Reason to Live

“ Do you think It’s broken?” I asked with my head back and a fist full of tissues to try and stop the blood from gushing out my nose. Holly sure packed a punch.

“Dunno. Oh this sucks!” Billie complained.

“What?” I asked.

“I think one boob is bigger than the other. Look, don’t you think?” she asked with a hand on each.

“I’m not going to look at your breasts Billie!”

“Why not? Just look,” Billie insisted.

“Billie your tits are fine ,ok?” I said a bit too loudly. The man in the aisle across from us watched and listened with extreme interest. Noticing this, Billie smiled triumphantly.
I gave him a disgusted look. “Enjoying this?” I snapped.

“Uh, I was just going to say, your nose is bleeding,” the man said nervously.

“Thank you sir. I did not know that,” I said sarcastically. He resumed staring out the aeroplane’s window.

“Geez you’re grouchy Audrey,” Billie observed. I gave her a look that underlined my discontent. “Argh! I’m so uncomfortable,” she complained.

“You’re kidding me right?” I said with a face so swollen that I could barely breathe. I’d swap it for odd sized boobs any day.

A piece of paper hit the back of my head, causing me to turn around and glare at Holly and Debbie. It was a note that read...

Sorry to fuck up your face.

“Sweet,” I said and turned around. I got another one.

Seriously. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just think you needed it chick. You’re fucking crazy.

I must not have looked impressed.

Debbie walked over to us. “Deborah! You can’t walk around on planes, you’ll get us kicked off!” Debbie hissed.

“Scoot Barbie, I need to talk to Audrey,” Debbie replied, kicking Billie out of her seat.

“But where am I supposed to go?”

“Go sit with Holly, she doesn’t bite... hard.”

Billie reluctantly left, leaving me and Deb alone to talk. I must say I was relieved to be away from Billie.

“She didn’t mean to hurt you,” Debbie said in Holly’s defence.

“ Then why did she do it?” I replied.

“Please tell me you know why.”

“Because I’m ruining the band?”

“No, that’s nothing. The time you miss when you’re late is just time we spend watching Miami Vice repeats anyway,” Deb laughed. “She punched you because she thinks that you need to wake up to yourself. You’re so love struck and it’s a little pathetic... please don’t get mad!” she backed off when I started to glare.

“Oh did he say it?” I asked, nobody in particular. I pulled at my hair in frustration.

“I don’t know Audrey.”

“If I knew how he really felt, I could be at ease and would stop being so obsessive.”

“Well you better call him as soon as you can and ask because you are driving me nuts woman.”

Later that night I sat in my hotel room, talking on the phone to Marie. I was yet to find the courage to call Bruce.

“She did what?”

“Punched me. I deserved it though.”

“She’s lucky I’m all the way over here in California because I would kick her ass!” Marie threatened.

“It’s ok, really. We sorted it out. Built our bridge,” I laughed at Marie’s hunger to beat Holly. “My face is still swollen though.”

“Other than the excruciating pain you’re in, how’s London?”

“Oh I love it! It’s beautiful. Today I had lunch at this amazing café and had these delightful boiled sweets that tasted like pure heaven... oh dear, I’m talking with a British accent am I not?”

“Yes,” Marie laughed. “Or at least you’re trying to.”

“Well, anyway, It’s been a pretty good day. Right now I’m completely relaxed, other than the fact that I’m freaking out about this whole Bruce thing, but yeah. I’m massaging complimentary designer moisturisers into my legs while I listen to the Beatles on the radio, and tomorrow I’m going to a party with Aerosmith! Jealous?” I teased.

“Well, let’s see. Today I ate a whole plate of nachos. It rocked. Then I had lunch with Bruce Kulick, your Bruce Kulick, who by the way did not stop talking about you...”

I couldn’t help but smile at that comment.

“...Then I went to a KISS concert, Gene let me play his bass. It was epic. But then he tried to make me pay. Nah, just kidding. And .... so I just had a bubble bath with Eric... pretty sure I just won. Jealous?” I could just picture the cocky grin on her face.

“You won as soon as you said Bruce Kulick,” I laughed. “Oh, Marie. What am I going to do?”

“Just talk to him. Don’t ask him or anything, but just be Audrey. He can’t resist you. I’m sure he’ll say it soon enough. But oh my fucking KISS call him. I know for a fact that he’s waiting by the phone. I don’t know for sure, but you know what I mean!”

“Thanks Marie. Why is this so hard?” I sighed.

“Eh... love is weird. Speaking of love, I think I found the perfect dress for my maid of honour,” she chirped in a nice change of subject.

“Oh really? That’s nice.”

“Yeah, I almost wanted it as the wedding dress. But it’s blue and I’m trying to be classy in white.”

“Blue, sounds amazing,” I giggled.

“Glad you think so. You’ll look so beautiful wearing it Audrey. I can’t wait until you get back here so that we can plan this wedding!”

“What? Me? You want me to be the maid of honour?” I asked, beaming with a smile.

“Well I did want Vinnie Vincent but he’s busy the day of the wedding,” Marie joked.

“Oooh that’s nasty,” I laughed.

“But you laughed. Yes, Audrey I couldn’t think of anyone better. You’re probably my best female friend. And Bruce will be the best man, I mean we haven’t asked him yet, but hell, I’ll make him say yes.

I laughed. “Sounds like fun. I should probably call Bruce. I miss you Bacon. Talk to you later in the week. Have fun!”

“Oh believe me, I will. Bye!”

I took a deep breath as I hung up the phone, then I smiled. Marie always makes me smile.
I dialled Bruce’s number and anticipated his voice. He greeted me with “Audrey Leanne.” It made my skin tingle, his voice was husky and sexy as hell. It sounded like he just woke up.

“Mr Kulick. It’s a pleasure. I am so very sorry to bother you at this hour, but I miss you ever so much.”

“You left Australian, now I’m worried you’ll come back retarded Jamaican,” he laughed.

“You don’t think I sound British?” I asked, sounding a little offended.

“No babe, sorry. I like your Aussie voice.”

“You Americans say Aussie weird.”

“You are such a dork.”

“Thanks Bruce.”

“You’re a cute dork.”

“You’re a sexy fool.”

We talked like that for hours. I almost died when I got the phone bill.