Let the Walls Break Down

I can’t believe this!!!! Today is the wedding rehearsal for Todd and Kylee! I always knew Ky’d get married but when I first met Todd I never thought it’d be him but I’m so excited for them! And I get to be the maid of honor so I think all we do is the groomsmen and the bridesmaids come walking in together and then Ky and Todd but I think that’s pretty much all we have to do.

I was even more excited that Alex came with me, he’s so sweet. I’ve been on a few dates with him….well six but who’s counting? He’s so adorable and sweet and he’s so much fun. He reminds me a little of Josh but Alex is way more hyper and crazy.

We were walking inside and Alex slipped his hand into mine so I looked up and smiled at him. As I pushed open the door I saw Ky and Todd sitting at a big long table with everyone else sitting around them, most of them Mulisha guys and in that pack of mulisha guys was him.

Everyone looked at usmaybe because we were late but I saw Josh’s eyes lock on me, then travel to Alex, then he looked at our fingers that were tightly intertwined. I saw a twinge of hurt in his caramel eyes but why? I didn’t think he cared about me anymore? Maybe he does….no, no he doesn’t or he would have called. I’m just kidding myself, I need to get over him. I’m with Alex right now it doesn’t matter what Josh thinks, he probably doesn’t care in the slightest.

“Well it’s about time you showed up,” Todd groaned.

“Sorry Mr.Grumpy gills,” I chuckled.

“You have a strange and unhealthy obsession with Finding Nemo - you quote it all the time!” Ky rolled her eyes.

“No she just embraces her inner child,” Alex piped up as I nodded my head.

“So guys this is Alex Gaskarth, and he just came to hang out,” I said.

“Well let’s get this thing started,” Brian Deegan said.

“Okay well Kirstie your walking down the aisle with Josh because he’s my best man and your Ky’s maid of honor and you would have known that if you were here earlier. So your right in front of Ky and I,” Todd explained as I stuck my tongue out at him.

I glanced over at Josh who was walking to get in line and I felt my heart turn inside my chest. Alex came over and put an arm around my waist and led me over to the line where everyone was getting ready.

“Did I tell you how pretty you look today?” Alex asked once we got closer and I saw Josh’s head jerk toward us which made me feel a little uncomfortable.

“Um I think so,” I said as he put both arms around me.

“Well I’m going to tell you again. You look so beautiful,” he said. I smiled as he pecked my lips then led me to the line and I stood next to Joshua.

“Are you dating him?” Josh asked without looking at me.

“I don’t think that’s any of your business,” I coldly said as I shot a quick glance at Ky who was behind me.

I then reluctantly linked arms with Josh as we started to walk down the aisle. Josh kept glancing at me which made me uneasy but I was happy once we finally got up to the front and we could part our separate wayslike we had a few months prior. Alex was sitting in the front row and he kept waving at me, it was so cute but I kept seeing Josh shooting him looks, BUTT OUT JOSH!

We finished up our practice and so we were just all hanging out in the room where the reception was going to be. Ky’s brother Adam thought Alex was so cool and they were chatting for a while about music, I thought it was pretty cute.

Todd and Josh were talking together as well as Kylee and I were only I kept seeing them glancing at Alexthis can’t be good.

“I think they’re bad mouthing Alex over there,” I pointed out to Ky.

“Just ignore them,” Kylee rolled her eyes.

“Do you think I’m doing the wrong thing by going out with Alex?” I asked starting to second guess myself.

“If Alex makes you happy I don’t think you should stop seeing him just because of Josh. But if you still love Josh I think you should stop,” She told me.

“I like Alex but I’m still confused about Josh. When I was in Europe I thought I still loved him but today he seems…different. Besides even if I wasn’t seeing Alex I don’t think it would make a difference,” I sighed looking at Josh. “I don’t think Todd likes Alex either,” I added.

“Well that’s just because he likes Josh….and he hates ATL,” Ky said as we both giggled a little bit.

“What do you think of Alex?” I asked.

“Whoever makes you happy, makes me happy,” she smiled.

Alex looked over at me and shot me a big adorable smile. He started walking toward me when Todd started jeering at him.

“So are you gay? Because your music sounds like it,” Todd shot at him making Josh laugh.

“Yeah well that music is making me millions of dollars,” Alex laughed right back.

“You know I’ve always heard your pants shouldn’t be tighter than your girlfriends though,” Josh cackled.

“You’re just saying that because your jealous that I’m with your ex-girlfriend,” Alex smirked as he slung an arm around me.

“Don’t even go there skinny jeans cause I could take you any day,” Josh spat as he started walking toward us.

“Stop it Josh,” I threw at him as I shot him an intense glare, and he immediately backed off.

“I think I should probably get going,” Alex whispered to me and I nodded. He left me a hug and a sweet kiss on the lips which only enraged Josh farther but he luckily didn’t say or do anything.

“I think I’m going to go make sure everything is set up right,” I quickly said as I briskly walked away to get out of the same room as him.

A few tears fell as I walked away. I don’t know why this hurt me so much to see him but it did. Why did Josh hold my heart in his hands this way? Why did those wounds he left seem to never heal?Maybe it was because he was the only one who could fix the ones he left.