Lullaby And Goodnight

I rubbed Rachael's stomach with my thumb softly. Her calm breathing made me smile. I lent on my elbow and watched her sleep for a few minutes before kissing her forhead softly and going for a shower. I lent against the shower wall and let the hot water spray onto me. I closed my eyes and thought everything through. I was so fucked up. What did Rachael mean to me? Did I love her? Or was it just lust I felt towards her? I had to get a few things straight with myself. Everyone in my past, Frankie, Ray, Linda, Ray's mom, everyone, was to be deleted from my memory. I scrubbed myself hard, like I had the day I was raped. I tried to scrub everything away. I had to stop comparing everyone to Frank. I'd focus on my future instead of my past. I washed and conditioned my hair to a sliky standered before stepping into my complete new start.

Rachael was brushing her gorgeous hair as I stepped out of the bathroom in just a towel round my waist. She smiled at me through the mirror at me as my arms snaked around her waist. I smiled at our reflection. She lent back on me and closed her eyes. I watched her and kissed her neck briefly before getting dressed. I raced her downstairs and into the kitchen where Helena had cooked a wonderfully smelling breakfast. It consisted of fried eggs, bacon, beans, sausages, and two slices of buttered toast each. My mom came in smiling broadly with two little blue books in her hand. She tossed one to me and one to Mikey, who was sitting opposite me. I gasped and grinned at my new passport. It had my picture in it and my personal details.

"Name: Gerard Authur Way, Date Of Birth: 9/4/77." I didn't read anymore. My mom had changed my name. I was no longer Gerard Carter, but Gerard Authur Way. I had a new middle name too? Cool. I swapped with Mikey and read his.

"Name: Michael James Way, Date Of Birth:10/9/81." I smiled and passed it back. I liked having a loving family and a secure best friend. Helena kept prodding my hair from behind and it took a while to realise she was combing and styling it. I earned myself a playful slap around the head as I shook my hair. I laughed and finished breakfast. School today. My second day at Beleville high. The bus ride there was full of tension. I was sat with Rachael and Mikey at the back. I saw Eliza in the arms of Cooper a few seats infront of us. I snickered as Mikey flicked a chewed up bus ticket at the back of Cooper's head and it mingled with his hair without him barely noticing. Eliza was being extreamly *bombastic. She was flicking her hair and batting her eye lashes. Why did I ever like her again? She fiddled with his **Shimmy between her fingers and ran her fingers up and down his basket ball shorts. I rolled my eyes and turned back to Mikey and Rachael's coversation. I was ***encompassed in people who wanted to impress. A bus full of sheep. That was my only ever ****mandate, not to follow the crowd.

The bus pulled over and lurched us all forward before Mikey and a few others got off the bus. Mom had arranged a place for him the Beleville middle school. After about half an hour, the bus pulled up at our own school and we reluctantly made our way off the bus, avoiding Cooper and Eliza at all costs. I laced my fingers with Rachael's and made our way to home room. Again, Mr Whiticar was greeted enthusiasticly. Even though Eliza tried to be teachers pet with him, Rachael seemed to be his favourite. He gave her a small plastic bag with three books in it. A Child Called It, The Little Prisoner and The Kid. She thanked him greatfully and stuffed them into her bag. Our first lesson was gym. We had it together, but I was alone in the locker room. I was encompassed by jocks. Of course several guys came up and told me lame rumars about kids been killed in this cold and tiled room and the ghost haunts and tortures the new kids. I rolled my eyes at them. I wish I hadn't. One guy caught me and made me yelp in surprise as he lashed my back with his gym towel. I couldn't feel a lot of pain since I was used to it, but it surprised me. I waited till most of the guys were in the gym till I pulled on my gym shorts and baggy Shimmy over my white tee shirt. I made my way out into the gym where Rachael was waiting. I saw a boy talking to her. I watched to see what would happen and fury surged around my body as he pushed her into a wall. I ran over and shoved him back from behind. He spun round and glared at me. Boy he was big. He was built like a brick wall and his muscles felt the same as he slammed me to the floor.

I pushed myself up, determined not to look wimpy infront of the other kids. I watched as he turned on Rachael again, but I stopped him. I pulled him to face me and as he turned his brute-like head, I slammed my fist into his meaty jaw. A few kids close by cringed at the cracking sound. As soon as his head slammed against the gym floor I pounced on him. I gripped his hair and slammed his head on the tiled floor. He was knocked out cold on my third blow. But I still cracked him over and over. Eventually, Mr. Cox, our gym teacher, came in. He was yelling as he pulled me away from him. Rachael looked terrified as the teacher dragged me into the gym office to calm me down. I was breathing deeply in an attemp to chill out. He sat behind the desk and I looked through the glass in the door. I held back a laugh as two guys carried the jock out to the nurse. I shook my head and turned back to my teacher, who seemed to be more sympathetic than angry.

"This is your first Gym lesson Gerard, and your already fighting? I know what David is like, but did he really go that far?" I lent against the wall and looked the teacher in the eye.

"He shoved Rachael." I looked away blushing slightly. The teacher lent back with a smirk on his face.

"Rachael Alexander? Perviously Rachael Lockheart. You like her Gerard?" He had an interested smile on his face. I couldn't stop my own.

"Yeah I do. But she's my best friend." He chuckled slightly to himself and sent me away, without even a detention. Rachael hugged me as soon as I opened the office door. A quick kiss had our teacher chuckling as he walked past us both.

"Thanks Gerard. Sorry if your in trouble." Rachael said as we broke apart. I smiled and shook my head, leading her back into the gym. We were on the apparatus today. Sir told us to get into pairs for trust excersises. Hehe. Time for some fun. The pairs were all boy, girl. So he had the boys, including me, lie on our backs with our knees bent. Rachael had to put her hands on my knees and I held her knees up. She then had to spin so our hands were together and so were our knees, she she was right over me. I winked at her and moved my legs so she fell ontop of me. I kissed her until the teacher cleared his throat. It was certainly the most interesting gym lesson ever.