Breathe, And For A Moment Enjoy The Freedom In This Perfect Chaos

I woke up a few hours later, nestled into Brendon's arms. I gave a content sigh and pulled Brendon's arms tighter around me.

"About time you woke up." Brendon chuckled from behind me. I laughed and turned around to face him. "Have a good nap?" He continued.

I nodded, "Anything involving your arms around me is good."

"I've been thinking." He stated after a minute. I looked up at him and his face was serious like he really in fact had been thinking about something. "I know what we're going to do. Now just trust me on this okay?"

"I trust you with anything Bren."

"Okay good. Want to hear the plan?" He smiled and kissed the tip of my nose. I laughed and nodded closing my eyes and placing my head on his chest ready to hear this so called plan.

"So as you know, we graduate next week." He started and I nodded, "Well after graduation, I want you to come to California with me." He stated and I felt me breathe hitch.

"Bren," I started but he cut me off.

"Ryan just listen before you try to argue. I have this all planned out. I have some close friends out there and they already said that they would let us stay there until we get out feet on the ground. We can just run away and escape from it all Ry! It would be perfect. I've got a few thousand dollars saved up that we can use and we can both get jobs. I know it wont be perfect, but we cant stay here Ryan. I can't bare to see you hurting like this. Just trust me okay? Come with me after graduation."

The room was silent for a few minutes while we both took in the plan, letting it sink into our thoughts.

"Brendon, I just don't think its going to be that easy."

"Why does it all have to be hard? Can't we just take a chance and jump?"

I took his warm hand in mine with a smile, "Okay. Yeah, lets jump. You just better catch me if I fall." I mumbled the last part into the crook of his neck while he pulled me into a hug.

****

I tossed my hat into the air and grinned at Brendon. We made it. We are officially high school graduates. All those years of agonizing work is finally all paying off. We're finally done. This day, I'll never forget. Brendon came over and placed his hand in mine while our classmates all cheered and went to get praised by their family and friends. The Urie family came up to us and we both got our share of hugs.

"I'm so proud of you both." Mrs. Urie choked out between here tears.

"Aw, mom don't cry." Bren laughed and hugged his mother.

"When are you two leaving?" She asked pulling back from her son's embrace.

"As soon as we pick up Ry's stuff from his house tonight. I'll call you when we get there okay?" She nodded and kissed her son's cheek one last time before come and bringing me into a tight embrace.

"You take care of my boy okay Ryan?"

"I will Mrs. Urie. I love him, I won't let anything happen to him." She pulled back and kissed my cheek.

"I know." We smiled and hugged each other once more before our group split in two, off into different worlds. You see we came out to Brendon's family after we decided to go to California. We figured we might as well be honest with them before leaving. Turns out they completely accepted and encouraged us for not only our decision but our relationship. It feels so good to be accepted by someone. I can't even tell you how good.

****

I clutched my bag within my hand as I shut the door to my bedroom for the last time, probably forever. It looked pretty much the same since all I was taking from it was a duffel bag of clothes and a few journals and pictures. The walls were still covered in posters, my shelves cluttered with random but meaningful objects. My closet full. It felt cold though.

I gave a weak smile and turned around look at my parents room. It was only me and my mom in the house since my dad was still at work so I entered the room without having to fear my life. My mom sat on her bed, face expressionless.

"Hey mom," I whispered waling to her bedside. She turned to face me, sad eyes and a weak smile playing across her face.

"Sweetheart," He choked and reached for my hand which I let her take.

"I'm so sorry mom. I didn't mean to cause all this. I was just so scared." I choked out.

"I know honey. This isn't your fault. This has all just come tumbling down so fast." She sighed, her faced reflecting genuine sorrow.

"I'm leaving mom. Probably forever." She looked at me with tears in her eyes.

"I'm going to miss you." She said and pulled me down for a hug.

"I'm sorry mom." I told her pulling back. I walked for the door about to leave this life forever.

"I'm sorry too Ryan. For everything. Especially your dad. I'm glad you found someone to love and treat you right." I didn't turn back at her comment, just kept walking out the front door to the waiting car ready to take me out of this hell and into a new life of promises.

****

"This is it Ry. This is our new life." Brendon grinned and pulled me into his arms, spinning us around on the sidewalk in front of a shabby house. We laughed and held each other close.

"I love you." I whispered into his ear before kissing him hard on the mouth.

"I love you too baby." He grinned and kissed me back. "Okay, lets go in." He laughed, picking me up bridal style.

"Brendon you dork!" I exclaimed slapping my palm against his arm. He laughed and kissed my head and walking us into our new house. Turns out we didn't have to stay with friends, Brendon's family had an old unused beach house that they never spoke about and when we told them where we were headed, they offered the place to us which we took with much gratitude.

"Welcome home baby," Brendon whispered, setting me down in the middle of the living room. "Where nothing will ever hurt you."