Be Good to Me

That was the last straw. I’d done enough groveling. I wasn’t going to text him back and beg for his forgiveness. I’d already tried that. He obviously didn’t care. I called my sister, who lived in a dorm at the community college a few minutes away.

“Cam, I’m studying. Can we talk later?” she answered the call.

I tried to speak without my voice cracking. “E-Ellie. I need you . . .” My voice cracked anyways and I couldn’t help but start sobbing again.

The line was quiet for a minute. “I’ll be there in sixty seconds. Hang in there, kid.”

Ellie made it to our parent’s house where I would live until I graduated, in record time. It still felt like an eternity to me. She barged into my room, crawled under the covers next to me, and wrapped me in her arms.

“It’s okay, I’m here. Whose ass do I need to kick?” she whispered. I wanted to laugh, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t do anything but cry just yet. Ellie seemed to understand that, so she sat there, and rubbed my back until I could talk.

When I could, everything came spilling out like a waterfall. It was mouth vomit at its worse, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. After all was said and done, I still couldn’t stop crying. I probably looked a mess, but I didn’t even care that I’d disposed of my bra and my boobs felt saggy underneath my over-sized hoodie. I just wanted my best friend back.

“Oh, baby,” Ellie said. “I’m so sorry. You know you deserve better than that. Do you want me to go tell him off? I will. I will go kick that boy’s ass to Australia. Just say the word.”

I shook my head. “Please, d-don’t do that. I d-don’t want any more trouble. He hates m-me enough as it is.”

“Cammie, he’s not worth all that trouble. He can’t do that to you. He’s always thought he could control you, and tell you who you can or can’t hang out with. You deserve better than that. He doesn’t know what a great friend he’s losing, okay?”

“It’s m-my fault though, Ell. I should have n-never gone to their h-house. I betrayed h-him,” I hiccuped.

“Stop blaming yourself. Jared’s being a douche bag. You’re better off without him. He told you to go, and then he changed his mind because he’s probably man PMSing, and he got jealous that you were spending time with somebody other than him. He has no right to control you, and treat you like this.”

“Thanks, Ellie. I appreciate y-you coming over here. I j-just need to be alone n-now though,” I said. She left without another word and I was left to cry in loneliness.

Jared didn’t text me again. A month had gone by, and we hadn’t spoken a word. I tried texting him a “Hey” every now and then. I called him a couple of times. All of my efforts were ignored, and I knew it was time for me to give up. His surprise party was tonight, however. I would go to his house, and help his sister set up. Since he was no longer coming over to my house for a movie while everyone showed up, Jared’s dad had agreed to take him car shopping, which was where they were now.

Mia didn’t speak to me much, and I assumed Jared had told her his side of the story.
“After what you did to my brother, why are you even here?” She asked me. I didn’t want to fight with her.

“I just want to make sure Jared has a fun time tonight. I’m not staying for the party, I just thought you could use some help,” I replied, not bothering to defend myself.

“Why would you want to help? You don’t care about him,” she continued.

The open bag of chips fell from my hands, somehow landing in the bowl I was about to pour them into. “Don’t you ever say I don’t care about Jared. He’s the one who won’t speak to me. I’ve tried all I can to apologize, but he doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore. I’m doing my very best to leave him alone right now,” I said. My voice was curt, and there was no room for argument.

Looking around the room, I saw that the decorations had been finished. After an hour of hard work, his backyard looked ready for a party.

“I think we’re done here. I hope he has a good birthday,” I said. A feeling of finality came over me as I made my way back to my house. Maybe after tonight, I could start over. I felt as if I might be able to move on.

Jared’s house was about a ten minute walk from my own, and only a two minute drive. Therefore, I watched out my window as all of his party guests made their way to his house. I was pleased that there was going to be a good turnout. Mia and I had worked hard putting everything together, and I didn’t want it to go to waste.

The cars stopped driving by for about half an hour. Then, Jared and his dad came down the road. I walked away from the window and went out to sit on the deck behind my house. It had a nice view of the pond in our neighborhood, and the weather was really pleasant tonight. I looked down at myself as I sat on a wicker lounge chair. I was wearing basketball shorts and a long-sleeve tee shirt with the Green Bay Packers emblem on the front. My hair was thrown up in a messy bun, and I knew I looked a mess.

After four weeks of crying myself to sleep every night, I was out of tears. It was about time, too. My tear ducts never needed to be used that much again. I would prefer it that way, at least.

I was grateful that I couldn’t hear what was going on at Jared’s house. It would depress me to listen to what a great time everyone was having. Despite the fact that I wasn’t there, I wasn’t sitting here sulking. I was just enjoying the quiet, drama-less time I was spending alone right now.

“Do you mind telling me what the hell you’re doing?” said a voice, coming up the stairs to my deck. It sounded all too familiar, but it was a voice that I’d only dreamed of ever hearing again over the last month.

“Jared,” I said monotonously. “Shouldn’t you be at your . . . house?”

I didn’t know if he’d gone there and found out there was a surprise party going on yet or not, so I didn’t want to spoil it.

“You threw me a party,” he sounded angry.

“Mia and I put it together,” I said.

He was standing in front of me, but I couldn’t look at him. I couldn’t break down. I didn’t want Jared to see me in a state of vulnerability.

“I know that it was all your idea. You sent out the invitations. You made sure everyone kept it a secret. You even came by today to set everything up,” he said. His voice was rising.

“Don’t worry, I wasn’t planning on showing up. I don’t really want to sit here and listen at you yell at me just because I’m the last person you wanted to throw you a party. I’m sure your guests are waiting for you,” I said.

Jared didn’t move. I was rooted to my chair. We remained in silence for what seemed like eternity.

“I didn’t come here to yell at you,” he said, sitting down at the foot of my lounge chair. I moved my feet out from under him, and he turned to face me.

My neck had a mind of its own. It forced my head to face Jared’s direction, but my eyes were closed. I wouldn’t doubt that I looked like a lunatic to him.

“Then why are you h-” I began to question him, but I got cut off by a kiss.

I opened my eyes out of surprise, and out of instinct I slapped him across the face. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I screeched at him.

Jared took one of my hands in his, and the other cupped the side of my face. “Listen, Cam – I’m so sorry about everything. The reason I got so angry was because I thought I was losing you. You know what a jealous psycho I can be, especially over you! I’m sorry it took me so long to realize that you went to Valerie’s house for me. I know you told me that, but I was too stubborn to listen. I am such a dick. You don’t deserve the way I treated you, and now I know that I was lucky to ever have a friend like you. You put all effort into throwing a party for me after I was a complete ass hole to you. When everyone jumped out to say surprise, I looked for your face. When I discovered that it was missing, I think my heart broke. It made me realize that I love you. I’m in love with you, Cam. I think I always have been.”

I sat there dumbfounded for about a year. I’m just kidding. That would be uncomfortable. I didn’t know what to say for a long time, though.

“You think you can ignore me for four weeks after treating me like utter trash? I spent every night crying myself to sleep because you didn’t want anything to do with me. I shut out my family, and any other friends I used to have who probably hate me now for avoiding them. I’ve been going through hell! You are not allowed to just show up and tell me you’re in love with me! We were best friends. How can I trust you after everything that you put me through?” I ranted.

Jared ran his thumb over my cheek, and I had to ignore the shivers it sent down my spine. “Cammie, I am eternally sorry. Just tell me what I need to do to make it up to you. I’ll do anything, I swear. Just give me a chance. I know I was wrong, now. You have to understand that I felt like I was losing you to the girls who are out to ruin me. I’ve lost everyone else to them, but I thought I always had you. Then, when you were at their house, I couldn’t help but think of everything that could go wrong. I didn’t want those bitches corrupting my innocent little Cam Cam. In a moment of insecurity, I thought I couldn’t trust you. I know I was wrong now. You’re the only one I can trust. You’re beautiful, smart, funny, mature, and you don’t take crap from anyone. There’s nobody better for me.”

Tears were welling up in my eyes. I wanted to give into him so badly. I’d always been attracted to Jared, but I knew that any romance between us could threaten our friendship, so I put it to the back of my mind. Now, here he was, pouring his heart out to me, confessing his love. What was a girl to do?

“Jared . . . you hurt me. I don’t ever want to feel that way again. Your surprise party . . .”
His eyes bore into mine, and he was making it really hard for me to stay strong. “I’ll never forgive myself for doing that to you. All I want to do now is protect you; hold you in my arms and be with you. I don’t care about my party. I’ll have other birthdays. None of them will matter if I don’t get to spend them with you, though.”

My breath caught in my throat, and this time when he kissed me, I didn’t push him away. His lips were soft and urgent. They felt perfect against mine. I never knew what I’d been missing out on, and now I was afraid to forget. After a few minutes, I pulled away feeling breathless.

“Jared, I think I love you, too,” I whispered. “Please don’t hurt me again. I don’t think I could handle it.”

He kissed me again, soft and quick. “Baby, now I know that I need you. I couldn’t hurt you if I tried.”

I grinned, and grabbed his hand, standing up. “Go back to your party. I’ll come over as soon as I get cleaned up.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” he argued. “I can help you get cleaned up.”

He winked at me and I pushed him toward the stairs. “You most certainly cannot! Get out of here, you dog.”

I began walking towards my house, but Jared called me back.

“Wait,” he said, running up to me one last time. “I love you, Camille. And guess what? I’m going to marry you, someday.”

Then, he kissed my cheek and dashed off down the stairs.

“I’m holding you to that!” I yelled after him.

Then, I just stood there and smiled for a little while. Real life did have happy endings sometimes.