Wonderwall

Darcy held her breath as she stepped into the house. It was eerily quiet. She had seen John’s BMW in the driveway so she knew he was here. Her eyes scanned over the boxes, neatly stacked in three piles. Her stomach churned as she looked for John.

He came from the kitchen. His arms were crossed and his face was contorted into a scowl. He stared at her for a long time, watching her fidget and frown as she avoided his gaze. Finally, he couldn’t take it anymore.

“We need to talk, Darcy.” He spoke sternly and the guilt swelled up inside of her.

“I suppose we do.” She sighed and took a few steps toward the couch. She sat down and then glanced up at him. “You might as well sit down. This may take awhile.”

He sighed too and took a seat beside her, though leaving a considerate amount of space between them. He laced his fingers together and looked at them hard. “Darcy, you’ve got to tell me what the hell’s going on.”

“I’m just … having some trouble back home. I needed to come out here for a bit to get away.” It was not a lie, but again it wasn’t the whole truth. There were more details to her story that normally she wouldn’t have a problem telling John, but this wasn’t a normal circumstance.

“Why didn’t you just tell me that, Darc?” He sounded pained as he looked over at her. She was still trying to avoid his eyes; it made it easier not to tell him everything. “I would have helped you. I would have welcomed you with open arms, just like I did. You’re family Darcy. I’ll do anything for you. You just have to say something.”

“I don’t want you to do anything, John.” She spoke softly, mostly to the floor, before she sucked it in and looked up at him. Her green eyes met his and the emotions clashed.

“Is there something wrong with Un—,”

“No.” She stopped him before he could speculate. She shook her head and licked her lips. “My dad’s fine. He understands why I had to come here, and I left him with some good nurses who’ll look after him. This isn’t about my dad.”

“Then what is it about, Darc? I’ll admit, I’m scared shitless right now. I knew something was wrong from the second I first talked to you, but I keep shutting my mouth up because I know you’ll tell me in your own time, but Darc, sweetie,” he glanced toward the boxes filling up his living room. “Time is running out.”

Darcy O’Callaghan sighed heavily. She couldn’t take it much more. She thought for a few minutes and then decided that she was sick of the half truths. “You know when my mother left,” John immediately reached over and took her hand in his. He knew she put on a brave façade when her mother came up in conversation, but he also knew that it was just that, a façade. She smiled a little and squeezed his hand. “When she left, I took over her role in a sense. I became Darcy, the sensible, responsible girl who always took care of the household.”

She looked at him and he nodded to encourage her on.

“I’m sick of it John. I’ve been the same dependable person for over ten years. My childhood was spent paying bills and making diner. I—,” she shook her head, unable to finish. Her eyes started to tear up and he clutched her hand tighter, bringing his other up to wrap around it too. She licked her lips and rested her head on his shoulder. “I wanted to get away.”

John swallowed. He should have seen this coming. “Why didn’t you tell me that in the first place, Darc?” His voice was just barely above a whisper as he rubbed her small hand in between his.

She shrugged. “I was scared. I still am.”

He closed his eyes briefly. John never thought he’d ever hear those words come from the Darcy O’Callaghan. He put his arm protectively around her and leaned them both back on the couch. “It’s okay to want change, Darc. It’s normal.”

“It’s not normal for me.” She muttered and sniffled. “I’m supposed to be the brave one, remember?”

John chuckled and squeezed her. “But being a coward is so much more fun.”

“You’re a nerd, John.” She smiled a little. Her chest felt lighter now thatmost of her reasons were on the table. “But I love you that way.”

“I love you too, Darc.”

“Thanks for letting me stay here.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.” He kissed her temple and then rested his head on hers. “Though we do need to find something to do with all these boxes.” He chuckled again as the two eyed the piles of brown boxes. “How much shit did you bring?”

“It’s not shit.” Darcy slapped his stomach to no avail and then stood up. “And I packed everything.” She walked over to the closest pile and read her own crooked handwriting on them. “From CD’s to clothes to notebooks.” She bit her bottom lip and tried her best not to cry. “Everything that’s mine.”

“So it’s kind of like you’re moving in?” John smirked, one side of his mouth arching higher than the other. Once Darcy glanced over her shoulder and saw it, she couldn’t help but smile and push away the tears.

“If you’re still okay with that?”

John rolled his eyes. “As I’ve said a million times Darcy, this is just as much your home as it is mine.” Her smile widened as she grabbed a box off the top and nodded.

“Great, I’ll just start unpacking these in my room now. You know, the old guest room.” They both laughed as he stood up and followed her, taking two boxes easily with him.

“Yeah, I didn’t like having a guest room anyway. Made me feel too damn lonely all the time.” Darcy cracked up and John’s smirk slipped into a smile. This was his Darcy. “Oh, and before I forget, how did your date go with Kenny?”

She rolled her eyes dramatically and then pursed her lips. She could either tease him with gory details that didn’t actually happened, or tell him the honest truth. She decided there were enough secrets already. “It was fun.” She sat her box down in the center of her room and turned to John. He was giving her that look that made her add on to her sentence. “And it was not a date.”

“I beg to differ.” He scoffed and led the way back out to the living room. “You went out together, alone, for ice cream. That’s a date Darcy and you know it.”

“It was simply two people who hardly know each other, eating Italian ice and talking. Not a date.” She crossed her arms and watched him pick up another two boxes without even making a face.

“Oh, so … what’d you talk about?” He raised his eyebrows and smirked again. Darcy scrunched her nose up and then stuck her tongue out at him. “Real mature, Darc.” He laughed as he took the boxes back to her room. She grabbed one of the more lighter boxes and followed.

“It’s part of my personality makeover. Don’t you know? I am now more childish and spontaneous than you ever were.” She giggled, but it died in her throat when John straightened up and turned toward her. His face was suddenly serious and his green eyes soft.

“Seriously, Darc.” He reached out and placed his hand on her shoulder. She dropped her box at her feet and bit her bottom lip. “I really think Kenny is the best thing for you right now.” Her mouth fell open a little as she looked at him incredulously.

“Really, John?”

“I think he’ll balance you out. Maybe give you some stability.” Both of them fell quiet at the words. John truly believed it but Darcy didn’t. She was sure no one could have that effect on her at this moment. He shook his head. “Ugh. That sounds so wrong. Someone giving you stability. I don’t know if I can get used to this new Darcy.”

Darcy smiled and placed her hand on top of his on her shoulder. “It’ll take time.”

He frowned. “You think you’ll ever go back?” She wasn’t sure if he meant Kansas or maybe her old self. He wasn’t completely sure either.

She frowned back at him. “No.”