Nightmare

I leaned back in the sofa, my legs crossed, my arms folded against my chest. My eyes focused on the floor, as I swallowed hard, my fingers drumming impatiently on my arm. Taking a few deep breaths, I closed my eyes, trying to calm myself down, trying to ease the tension that was coursing through me. Feeling a hand on my arm, I opened my eyes to see it was Zofie that sat beside me, offering me a kind, sympathetic smile.

“So, Johnny,” I lifted my eyes to my friend that stood a little ways away from me. “What do you say?”

Johnny was leaning against the wall for support, staring into the blazing fireplace, sighing. “Starr…” he looked over at me finally. “I don’t know if I can do that.”

“What do you mean you don’t know?” I snapped. “It’s not that hard to do, Johnny. I know you can do it. The question is, will you do it?”

“Starr, it isn’t that simple!” Johnny protested, walking over to me, sitting on my other side.

“How is it not simple?” I asked.
“I…” Johnny shook his head. “Starr, this is where you belong. Tristan expects you to be here waiting for him—”

“Tristan is a cool guy,” I cut him off. “If anything, he’s just gonna come looking for me on his own. He won’t bother you guys if you tell him the truth. I wanted to go home, so you let me.”

“Okay, so I let you go back,” Johnny nodded. “Then what?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know…” I let my eyes fall to my lap, hearing my voice crack, as my throat began to close up, my vision getting blurry. “What am I supposed to do, Johnny?” I whispered, feeling a tear slide, looking back up at him. “What am I supposed to do? He slept with her… He slept with her…”

I felt my heart breaking again, a soft sob escaping my lips as Johnny pulled me into a hug. I hugged him back, wrapping my arms around his torso, crying into his chest, and feeling myself hardly able to breathe.

“Starr…” Johnny murmured, rubbing my back soothingly. “I’m so sorry, Starr.”

I knew he was trying to comfort me, but there was nothing her could do or say to comfort me at the moment. I just continued to hug Johnny, sobbing away as my heart broke into tinier, unfixable pieces as I thought about what had happened.

Red had showed up at the house, his ex-lover, with Zacky claiming they were just friends even after he completely forgot about me the moment she walked through the door, the day after he told me he loved me.

I get angry and upset, feeling brushed aside, which I was, but then I allowed myself to be talked into being okay again. I let Zacky sweet-talk me; I let myself fall for a few lines, believing that there really was nothing wrong with the situation.

I let myself believe that I was going too far, that Zacky really did love me, and that I had nothing to worry about.

And then what happens? I get screwed over.

Zacky believes some lies that Red told him, jumping into bed with her.

“I thought he loved me,” my voice was soft as the crying finally ended.

“He does love you, Starr, he—”

“No,” I cut Johnny off, sitting up, wiping my eyes roughly. “He doesn’t love me… Zacky never loved me. I was a fool to think he ever did.”

“Starr, please don’t say that,” Zofie begged from beside me.

“It’s the truth,” I told her with a sad smile. “He doesn’t love me…” I bit my lip lightly with a humorless laugh. “Why? Why was I so stupid? I could never be enough for Zacky… why did I think I ever could be?”

“Starr, Zacky loves you, he does,” Zofie pleaded for me to listen to her. “He loves you so much… he just made a mistake. I’m not saying he wasn’t wrong, but he loves you. Please don’t do this...”

“I have to, Zofie,” I told her sadly. “I can’t stay here like this, knowing he slept with Red like that. That he believed the lies she told him about me not thinking about him while I was with Tristan, that I would forget about him once I returned… I can’t pretend like everything’s okay.”

“I’m not telling you to,” Zofie said. “I know you’re hurting. I know you’re heartbroken. I remember my human life and the emotions I felt… I know what it’s like… I remember…” She hugged me, resting her head on my shoulder in attempt to comfort me.

“Zofie, I appreciate what you’re doing,” I told her. “You too, Johnny. I appreciate everything both of you have done for me, as well as everyone in this house. You made me feel like I was welcome here, helping me adjust to everything without losing my mind… you guys… you’re been the greatest friends that I could have ever asked for.”

“Aw, Starr…” Zofie smiled, rubbing my arm. “You’re an amazing friend too. We’re so happy that we got a chance to meet you and get to know you as we have…”

“I won’t forget all that you guys have done for me, but I can’t stay here. I have to go.” I stood up, taking a few steps away, watching as the two vampires followed.

“We’ll miss you, Starry,” Johnny said hugging me.

I nodded. “I’ll miss you guys too,” I said hugging him back before hugging his girlfriend just as tight. “Say goodbye to everyone for me…thanks again for everything.”

Zofie nodded, giving me a big smile, filled with sadness. She opened her mouth to say something, but before she could, the door opened, interrupting her. We all turned and I saw Nikki standing there, her eyes wide-open resembling saucers, with Brian, Matt, Adarina and Kriselle behind her.

“Starr?” Nikki looked at me, walking over with the rest. “Do you mind telling me what’s going on here?”

I gulped, knowing what was coming next; her outbursts that she’s famous for.

“I’m sorry, Nikki,” I apologized quietly, knowing that was the only words I would get in for a while.

“You’re sorry?” She screamed, making me jump lightly at how loud she was. “You’re sorry? You’re just gonna leave us like this? Why would you even think that? We’re your friends, Starr! We’re family! And you just wanna leave like it’s not big deal?”

“What do I have left here?” I shouted back. “The only reason I stayed here to begin with was because of Zacky!”

I saw Nikki’s eyed harden at the mention of the name.

“Zacky…” she growled, her hands forming tight fists. “Zacky Vengeance!” She shouted loudly, like she was calling for him.

I sighed, running my hand over my face. “Nikki, I get it, don’t worry…”

“What do you mean?” She shouted at me.

“Nikki, please,” my voice was pleading as my eyes collected with tears again. “I… can’t stay here after all this. I love Zacky, and…” I bit my lip, trying my hardest not to have another breakdown, wiping away a few tears, taking a deep breath. “Nikki, he just cheated on me like that… he believed Red…”

“But Starr…” Nikki grabbed my hands, looking me dead in the eye. “You… what about what you are here? Kill Zacky for all I care—I’ll help you with it, even… but… you can’t just leave the underworld, leave us… like I said, we’re family.”

I nodded, another tear falling. “Nikki, we are family. You guys have done so much for me, and I do see you guys as my family, but I can’t stay here. If I do, I’m gonna end up losing any of the sanity I have left… the only reason I didn’t lose it when you first brought me here was because of Zacky… I can’t…”

Nikki pulled me into a tight hug, which I gladly accepted. I would happily take a hug when I feared she was going to slap me across the face.

“I’m gonna miss you, girly,” she told me with a small smile.

“I’ll miss you too,” I said. “I’ll miss all you guys. But you know I can’t stay here.”

They all nodded, and one by one, I gave them each a hug goodbye.

“If you guys ever go to the other dimension, look me up,” I told them.

Matt was about to say something, but her was cut off when the door opened once more, revealing the last person I ever wanted to see again.

“Zacky…” Zofie mumbled.

Zacky looked at the group of us, looking at the guys who looked bothered, the girls who looked upset, and then his eyes fell on me. He saw the tear stains on my face, his mouth hanging open in shock.

“What’s going on?” He asked.

“Zacky, you bastard I’m gonna kill you!” Nikki screamed, flinging her self at him, punching him right in the face.

Zacky fell back, not expecting the blow, but quickly got to his feet, staring at her like she was a madwoman. “What the hell Nikki?”

Nikki threw another punch at him before Matt wrapped his arms around her wais, pulling her back and restraining her. “I’ll kill you Zacky! You and your slut! How dare you hurt Starr like that! I will rip your head off if it’s the last thing I do!”

The room went silent and I felt all eyes fall on me, including a pair of jade green ones. Feeling beyond uncomfortable, I said nothing, just giving my friends a small smile before walking past Zacky, going to the door.

“Starr!”

I heard Zacky calling after me but I kept going, not having it in me to stop. He caught up with me rather quickly, taking hold of my arm, turning me to face him.

“Starr, what happened?” He asked, concern washed over his face. “What’s wrong?”

“Forget it, Zacky,” I muttered, pulling away.

“Starr, stop,” He grabbed onto me again, pulling me back. “What’s wrong? You’re crying.” He ran his thumb over the side of my face, tracing at the tearstain. “Talk to me, baby.”

“Zacky, just get away from me!” I slapped his hand away. “How can you even look me in the eyes and ask me what’s wrong?”

Zacky’s mouth hung open in shock once again. I just hsook my head walking away again when he said nothing, but he quickly stopped me again, pulling me back, and trapping me between his body and the wall.

“Starr, listen to me,” he said.

“No!” I shouted. “What do I have to listen to? I think I heard enough when you were moaning Red’s name!”

I saw the pain that flickered in Zacky’s eys, but I didn’t care anymore. I wouldn’t let him talk me out of this one. There was no way he could; I know what I saw and heard.

“Starr…” he bit his lip rings. “Baby…”

He held the side of my face, but I tried to shove him off again. Zacky, however, was much stronger than me, pinning my arms down, moving closer to me, his hand remaining on my face.

“I’m not your baby,” I told him, my voice low and cold.

“Starr, I didn’t mean for that to happen,” Zacky said. “Believe me, I didn’t. I would never hurt you like that.”

“But you did!” I screamed. “You did, Zack! You…” I shook my head, trying not to cry. “You believed what Red told you… you believed her, that I wouldn’t remember you…”

“I know, and I’m sorry. Starr, baby, I’m so, so sorry. I wasn’t thinking. Red was telling me about that, and I couldn’t think straight. Her words got to me, and I started thinkg about what would happen if that were true, and…” he shook his head. “Starr, please… I love you.”

I saw the hurt in Zacky’s eyes, the sorrow from what he had done. He wasn’t lying; I could easily see that. His eyes showed me that he was truly sorry for what he had done.
“I love you,” he whispered again before pressing his lips to mine gently.

Just the feeling of his lips against mine was enough to make all air leave my lungs, my body trembling. I felt myself choking up, the tears building up, being overcome by too many emotions.

I loved him.

I loved Zacky more than I could even express, more than anyone could ever love someone else. Everything about him called to me, making me want him more than anything else on earth. He was what I needed, what I wanted; as long as I had him, I had it all. He was everything to me. I gave him everything, knowing he was all I could ever ask for.

Zacky slowly pulled away, and I saw the slight glimmer of hope in his jade eyes; hope that everything would be okay.

If only everything would be okay…

“Leave me alone, Zacky,” I told him, my voice soft but strong. “I don’t need you in my life.”

I moved past him, walking downt he hall again, but once more, Zacky stopped me.

“No,” he shook his head. “No, Starr, you love me. You can’t say you want me out of your life or that oyu don’t need me…” He sounded more like he was trying to persuade me rather than state it, holding onto me as if his life depended on it. “Starr… I love you, and you… you love me too, I know that.”

“I don’t love you!” I told him.

I saw Zacky’s eyes widen in what I imagined to be absolute horror. If he could have turned colder, her probably would have.

“I don’t love you, Zack,” I repeated, shaking my head, hoping that the tears that were threatening to spill weren’t calling me out as a liar. “I don’t love you, I don’t need you… I hate you.”

They say that the eyes are the windows to soul. They say that it is the eyes that show you what a person is truly feeling; that if you want to know what someone is really thinking, just look them in the eyes and you will have all the answers you need.

Looking into Zacky’s eyes were enough to let me know exactly what was going on in his mind. As soon as those words left my mouth, I could see pain and damage they caused him, and it was enough to break my heart—well, that is, if my heart wasn’t already broken.

Zacky’s grip loosened on me instantly, his eyes not leaving mine, his body not moving. It looked like he had become paralyzed, but I didn’t care. He hurt me too deeply for me to care.

So I just walked away.

I left Zacky there, feeling his eyes on me as I walked away. With each step I took, I felt my heart breaking even more, the tears cascading down my face, feeling a hot white pain surging through my veins, all over my body, scorching and burning my heart, setting it on fire.

I just walked away, forever locking the name Zacky Vengeance Baker away deep in my heart, never wanting to hear it ever again. I was done here. I was leaving this all behind.

I was leaving Zacky behind, promising myself I would never go back.

The End.