Dark and Dirty Like You've Never Seen

I sat in one of the comfy chairs with my feet tucked under me, sipping on my favorite white tea. Gerard and I had been sitting at the coffee shop for about half an hour now. Being midweek and in between breakfast and lunch, there weren’t many people here. Gerard had just told me about how all the guys met and when they had started the band. Right now Gerard is in the restroom and I used this alone time to gather my thoughts. I really had been paying attention to Gerard but part of me was still dwelling one the exchange I had with Aaron earlier. I said I would do anything to keep him from hurting Frank, and I meant that, but how far was I willing to go. Surely I could find something to accommodate him without having to do the unthinkable. Right now, I was coming up short. I saw Gerard coming out of the bathroom and tried my best to not think about that right now. I was pretty bad at hiding my emotions and I didn’t want him asking what was wrong with me because I wasn’t a very good liar, either. I shifted in my chair as Gerard took the one across from me. He stretched out and smiled at me.

“So, you and Frankie… how’d that happen?”

“Oh … um, well he just sort of asked me the other day right before the party. Nothing spectacular.”

“Hmmm … lucky bastard.” He mumbled the last part as he took a swig of his coffee. I felt my skin heat slightly. What was that supposed to mean? I wanted to change the subject.

“Hey, who’s Vee?”

He was in the middle of taking a drink when I asked. This caused him to choke slightly, and sit up in his chair. He cleared his throat and gave me a stern look.

“Who told you about her?”

“You did …” I stared at him with concern. Why did everyone seem to get so upset over this girl? I don’t even know who she is.

“I did?”

“Yeah, at the party. You were pretty drunk. So was I. I can’t believe I remember that. You said I looked like someone named Vee, though …”

“Huh… that’s weird.” He sat back in his chair again and took a long drink this time. I waited for more but he just sat there, casually staring out the window at traffic. I was starting to get annoyed. Why won’t anyone tell me who she is? I want to know why everyone gets upset when someone mentions her name, especially if I look like her. I decided someone was going to tell me one way or another

“So is she someone’s ex or something? Is this the crazy girlfriend Frank talked about that one time?” I was staring directly at him but he didn’t turn his gaze from the window

“Just someone we knew”

“How?” I was starting to lose my patients with how vague he was being.

“It’s complicated…” His hand was gripping the arm of the chair.

“Well, where is she now?” I was about to start yelling if someone wasn’t going to give me a straight answer.

“Dead.” He snapped his head around and stared at me. His expression was unreadable.

I sat with my mouth slacked open. I didn’t know what to say. I felt my face burn with embarrassment. I made a complete ass out of myself. I thought I was going to spontaneously combust at that very moment, or at least I wish I would have. After a beat, his face softened.

“I’m sorry, it’s just … it’s still a touchy subject for me. You didn’t know.”

“I don’t know what to say … I’m sorry.” I let my gaze fall into my lap. There was an awkward pause. Curiosity was getting the better of me and I wanted to know what happened, but I could tell Gerard was still hurt by the whole thing. We sat in silence for another minute before he let out a sigh, causing me to look up at him.

“One year and seven months.”

“What?”

“That’s when it happened. One year and seven months ago. Car accident.”

“Oh … was she--”

“My girlfriend? Not exactly. That’s why it’s complicated.”

I really shouldn’t pry anymore. I feel bad the way it is. I decided I wasn’t going to ask any more questions. If he was willing going to share the information, that’s fine but I can’t press the issue.

“Well I really am sorry for your loss…” There was a moment of silence where I wasn’t sure what to say and Gerard was obviously not all here right now. Luckily, my phone started buzzing in my pocket. I pulled it out and saw Frank’s name. I raised an eyebrow but stood up from the chair. “I’ll be right back.” I motioned to Gerard. He just nodded and turned his gaze back out to the street. I walked outside on the patio and answered my phone. “Frank?”

“Yeah. What’re you doing?”

“I’m getting coffee with Gerard. How are you calling me?”

“I’m in the bathroom. It’s lunch right now. So you got to his place ok?”

“Yeah. So how has your day so far? Any … problems or anything? …”

“Problems? No … like what?”

“Oh, nothing. Just asking…” I shook my head. I still haven’t told him about Aaron. I know he’s not at school today so there shouldn’t be any problems. I heard the door open and turned to see Gerard has walked out on the patio now. He nodded toward my phone and mouthed ‘Frank?’. I nodded back. I mouthed back, ‘You wanna talk?” He shook his head yes. “Hey, Gerard wants to talk to you, ok?”

“Uh… sure.”

I handed the phone over to Gerard who gladly took it from me.

“What’s up fucker? Having fun?”

I couldn’t hear Frank’s end of the conversation but Gerard laughed in response to whatever he said.

“How ‘bout we come rescue you then? … Alright, well get ready sir, cause we’re on our way.” He ended the call and handed the phone back to me. “So, how would you like to save your boyfriend?”

“Sure.” I perked up at this. Frank and I were on a roll these past few days. First our break in and now a kidnapping. I grinned and started walking to Frank’s car.

“How about you just ride with me? We can come back for his car later.”

I shrugged my shoulders and followed Gerard to his car. I climbed into the passenger seat as Gerard got in the driver’s seat, bringing the car to life. I looked around his vehicle. It was a lot messier than Frank’s. There were various sketch books, song books, and some trash scattered in the back seat. It also had the same smell of stale cigarettes like Frank’s, but it just didn’t have the same effect on me like Frank did. On our way to the school, I saw Gerard take out his phone and dial a number. After a moment someone answered.

“Yes, this is Frank Iero’s father, Frank Senior… Yes, I needed to pick him up from school; we’ve had a death in the family… Yes, thank you…”

I watched in awe as Gerard was able to rattle off all the information they needed to have him pick up Frank. He finally hung up the phone and looked at me, a smirk on his face.

“How… how did you …”

“That’s not the first time I’ve done this.” He laughed and turned his attention back to the road. I guess I should have expected that. Gerard seems like a mischievous kind of guy. In a few minutes we were parked outside the front of the school. We saw Frank standing in the lobby. When he saw our car, his face didn’t even change. In fact, he was doing a good job looking upset. Both of them are way too good at this lying thing. He climbed in the car and didn’t say a word until we pulled out of the parking lot. I turned to look at him in the back seat. He had his head hanging low, looking in his lap.

“Frank…?”

He heard what I thought was him sniffling. I started to become a little concerned. I started to reach my hand out to shake him when he looked up at me. I saw that he was smiling. My face changed to a look of confusion and he started laughing that cute, addictive giggle of his and I couldn’t stop the smile that spread across my face. I reached out and punched his leg.

“You’re such an ass.”

“But I’m so good at it.” He grinned from ear to ear before leaning forward and planting a kiss on my lips.

“Yeah… I guess.” I smirked at him and turned to face the front of the car again.

“So kids, where to?” Gerard asked as he reached into his middle counsel pulling out a pack of cigarettes. He placed one in his mouth and held the pack out to Frank who also took one. He gently placed it between his lips as reached in his pocket and pulled out a lighter. I watched as he lit it and took a long drag. He rolled down his window and let the toxic air escape his lips and sighed as he slumped back in the seat. I still wasn’t sure about the whole smoking thing, but if anyone could make me change my mind, it was him. Gerard shook another one out of his packet and offered it to me. I hesitated before taking it from the box. I wasn’t sure I actually wanted to or not. He could see the hesitation on my face and chuckled. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to, but you were practically a connoisseur the other night.”

I blushed as I remembered trying a cigarette for the first time that night, and shot gunning one from Frank as well. I placed it in between my lips and leaned over as Gerard offered his lighter to me. I inhaled and watch as the end sparked to life. As I exhaled the smoke I felt myself start to relax a little. I sat back in my seat and watched as the smoke curled off the end of the cigarette and danced out the window into the passing air. I was intrigued by something so simple. I was torn from my train of thought when Gerard repeated his question.

“Is there anything you guys wanna do? Anywhere you wanna go?” He looked between Frank and I. I just shrugged my shoulders. Frank sat there for a moment in thought.

“What’s Toro and Bryar up to?”

“Nothing that I’m aware of. Why, you thinking of a little jam session?”

“Sure, why not? Angela’s never heard us before.”

“What do you think Angela?”

“I’d like that.” I smiled at them as I took another drag off the cigarette placed awkwardly in between my fingers. I’ll get the hang of it eventually.

“Alright, I got Ray, you got Bob?” Gerard asked as he dug in his pocket for his phone.

“Yup.” Frank retrieved his phone from his pocket and punched in his number. I sat sideways in my seat so I could see the two of them. I watched Frank as he took another hit off his cigarette. He caught my eye and gave me a wink causing me to blush slightly. As I turned my gaze toward Gerard, I heard Frank respond on the phone. Bob must have picked up. Gerard was still waiting on the line when he glanced over at me. He, too, gave me a wink and a smirk before turning back to the road. I kept the smile on my face but turned to face the front again. I was glad to be spending my time with Frank, and I had fun getting to know Gerard more, but I couldn’t stop the awkward pulling feeling in my stomach when they both looked at me. And I couldn’t get Vee out of my head, either. Who the hell was she?