Drop Dead.

He’s here again and I bite my tongue at the mere sight of him. His hair is combed to perfection and his clothes are polished, stating that he has money. The way he walks about with his head held high makes my insides twist. The way he puts on that damn mother fucking retarded smile that spreads from one ear to the other makes me want to puke all over him and then see how friendly he is.

Does this fucker think he’s better than us? I hate that. I hate the looks people give us, all of us. I bet that we’re better than half those assholes out in the world. Fuck them and fuck their bullshit. They’re all useless and could never survive the way we do.

I scoff and watch Gel like a bloody hawk as she walks up to thefucker man. He smiles at her and the moment his hand rests on her shoulder I’m at her side with a death grip around his wrist, I push the shit head away and glare.

He stares down at me with a slightly surprised expression and for a moment I expect him to scold me but he does the exact opposite. He smiles kindly at me and says, “I haven’t seen you before. I’m Carter, what’s your name?”

My eyes narrow but Gel grips my hand and I look down at her. She smiles reassuringly at me and says, “It’s ok, Jinx…Carter is really nice!”

That’s how they all seem to be. They’ll smile, laugh, and speak to you in a way that makes you think that it’s ok to trust them. Then, when your guard is down, they’ll stab you in the back. They’ll use and abuse you until the pain is too much to take.

I growl and shove Carter away. He stumbles backwards and watches as I stalk back to the stairs. Taking a seat at the bottom, I continue to watch Gel to make sure that man doesn’t try to do anything funny. As I do this, I see every time he looks back at me with a slightly concerned and curious expression. It only intensifies my glare.

Asshole is probably just angry that I’m keeping him away from Gel. He’s probably a perv just like all the others.

Prince, what should I do? There’s someone trying to stick their nose into our business. There’s a stranger in our world, one that we hate. What would you do if you were here, Prince? Would you let him be here? Would you trust him? Should I trust him? Prince, I really need your advice right now. I wish you were still with me.

I don’t trust him at all. He’s like all the others, I just know it. Besides, what if he tells? What if this man informs the police and they come here to take away our home? Not only that but if he tells the foster homes about us, then what? What will I do? Gel…she can’t go back there, neither can I.

I don’t trust him. Fuck the fucker. He needs to stop butting into other peoples’ business before something bad happens to him and he decides that it’d be good to ruin our lives.

“Come on man…he ain’t that bad,” Tee says this through a mouth full of food. Taking another bite from his sandwich, he swallows and watches as I take a bite of mine. I made sure to get mine when Carter wasn’t around and it was just Janet. “He’s actually pretty nice y’know.”

I shake my head, showing that I don’t want to talk about it. Sighing, Tee shakes his head and we eat in silence. When finished I get to my feet and walk towards the window. I watch as people walk down the street on this unusually warm winter day.

It’s been fairly warm this week, which we’re all grateful for. The warmer the better, considering that we have no heat in here and the only way to keep warm is to cuddle with the ones we know.

“It’s nice out today,” Gel says, appearing behind me.

I nod and look down at her with a genuine smile. She giggles and wraps her arm around my own. Resting her head on my shoulder she asks, “Can we go for a walk? I…I don’t w-want to go by myself.”

I shrug to show that I’ll do whatever she feels like considering that I have nothing else to do. Gel squeals and zips up her jacket. The both of us throw our hoods over our heads to keep our faces warm and I reach for her hand, squeezing it in my own. Laughing, she follows me outside and we walk down the sidewalk, Gel talking her mouth off while I listen and nod when needed.

A gust of wind blows by, chilling us both to the bone. Shivering, Gel buries her face in her jacket and mutters, “Maybe we should head back? It’s starting to cool off.”

The two of us shuffle back before it gets too cold and as we lie there that night, shivering in each others arms, I pray to whatever God there may be for it to be warmer tomorrow.

~

“Here, for you.”

I stare at the blanket quizzically. Raising an eyebrow, I look at Carter to see that he’s smiling as idiotically as ever. It makes my lip twitch with the want to snarl and plant my fist in his face just to see what he’d do. Growling, I get up and walk away from him, something that I don’t think he expected because when I sat down across the room he was still standing there with a questionable look.

He frowns and I scoff, cross my arms, and look away. Not long afterwards, Tee is beside me with the very same blanket. He waves it in my face and asks, “Why da fuck would ya give this up? It’s a blanket! Take it, man.”

“No.” I state coldly. “I don’t need his pity.”

“Dude, are ya fuckin’ kiddin’ me? Pity or not, we need this so fuckin’ take it. You’re just bein’ stubborn. I bet Prince would take it.”

My entire body stiffens and eyes narrow into slits at the dirt covered floor that did absolutely nothing. With my teeth grinding together, I hold out my hand and Tee places the soft fabric between my fingers. I grip it tightly and throw it onto my lap with an aggravated grunt. Of course Tee finds amusement in my anger and laughs.

“He ain’t that bad man. If Janet and Terry brought ‘em he’s obviously trust worthy.”

“They all seem that way,” I counter. I wouldn’t be surprised if my eyes flashed red after saying that. So many people I have trusted when I was younger and all of them betrayed me, one way or another. Rape, abused, I’ve been through it all and it has taught me a lesson.

Trust no one. And so far I’ve been doing damn fine by myself. I don’t need Carter to show me any sympathy. Fuck him.

Looking up, I see Carter surrounded by a sea of people, all asking for one thing or another. He smiles and gives out what he has. My teeth grind whenever he looks my way and smiles while waving. I lift up my hand as if to do it back and I can see the happiness in his eyes, until I give him the bird and walk away.

Asshole. We don’t need him.