What You Mean to Me

Lena.

The cool, crisp night air hit me, bringing me back to reality, washing away the tipsy feeling I had instantly. I became much more awake, alert, and happy. Happy because Frank was by my side.

"So where are we going?" He asked breaking the silence that was between us as we walked down the street.

"Somewhere," I answered, zipping up the light jacket I had on.

"Okay, then why did you want me to go for a walk with you?" Frank asked next.

I shrugged. "No reason… what? Are you regretting that you came with me, leaving Nora?" I tried not to let the bitterness seep into my voice.

"Is that what this is about? You wanted to get me away from Nora?"

I bit my tongue, quickening my pace a little so he couldn't see my face. "No, of course not."

The bad thing about knowing Frank since I was three, he knows exactly when I'm hiding something from him.

He reached for me, pulling me back. "Lena, are you--"

"I'll race you!" I yelled breaking away from him, sprinting down the street.

I heard him groan before taking off after me. I ran as fast and for as long as I could, not wanting for him to read me like he could. Frank loved Nora-- he had been with her for a year, seven months and ten days. They loved each other, and were happy together, and I couldn't do this to my best friend. I couldn't be the jealous person that I am in front of him. If I could just run for a little longer, maybe he would stop chasing after me, and go back home, and forget all about this.

Maybe…

"Lena!… Lena, stop! Stop, stop, stop!" Frank caught up to me, pulling me back with much more force than he had prior, tightening his arms around me.

I let my head rest on his shoulder, breathing in his scent-- a mixture of his cologne and cigarettes, now with a hint of booze-- that I loved so much, and couldn't get enough of.

Frank held us there as our breathing returned to normal from the running, before he pulled away slightly, so he could look at my face.

"Lena, what the hell was that?" He yelled.

"I don't… know," I admitted honestly, gasping for breath.

He shook his head. "Lena… I think we're a little over due for a talk."

I swallowed hard. Yep, here it comes.

"Do you not like Nora?" he asked.

I looked into Frank's eyes, searching for the answer that he wanted to hear. Hs eyes were curious yet apathetic, a strange combination in my opinion for a question of this sort.

"No," I answered. "No, I don't not like Nora."

"Really?" Frank asked unbelieving, and a bit shocked.

I nodded, acting very convincing. "Yeah, I mean, she's your girlfriend… I like her."

Yeah, I like her enough to drown her.

Frank nodded. "Okay, just making sure."

We continued on along the street in silence for a little until I spoke up.

"But what if I didn't like Nora? Then what?" I asked, curious.

Frank shrugged. "I don't know… I'd probably take a break from her."

"Why?" I asked.

"Because you're my best friend," he answered with a small smile. "I mean, you would not like her for a reason... I'd take a break from the relationship, take a step back, reevaluate her, and see what it was that I was overlooking."

"Really?" I was astonished at hearing that.

"Yeah… if you didn't like her, it would be for a good reason, like she wasn't who I really thought she was or something… because I know that you only want what's best for me-- for me to be happy."

I nodded, feeling tears stinging me eyes. I really needed to put an end to all this jealousy. Frank clearly thought of me in such a high stance, and that I would never just not like his girlfriend for a reason as stupid as jealousy. He trusted me to tell him if she was being untrue to him, or the like.

Wow.

I smiled, taking his hand, and leading him towards a back street. "Come on. This way."

Five minutes later, I was still guiding Frank along.

"Okay, seriously, where are we going?" He asked laughing.

"Here," I said, leading him towards train tracks.

"Oh, no way," Frank whispered. "Here? Really?"

I nodded.

"We haven't been here since we were kids," he said looking around. He smiled, now pulling me towards the tunnel that the tracks led into, and down into it, still holding my hand.

"Frank, how far in are you taking me?" I asked as I followed down the vaguely lit tunnel.

"Right here," he suddenly stopped, running his hand over a part of the wall opposite a small light that was installed above.

I looked at the concrete and saw what had been etched into the material years ago: Frank and Lena Forever.

I smiled, reaching out and touching it. "I had forgotten this was here."

"This is our spot," Frank said with a smile. "It's still here, and we're here again, just like we used to be when we were kids… now all we're missing is--"

Frank was cut off by the near-distant whistle of a train.

"The train…" I finished for him with a smile.

Frank held my hand tightly and we flattened ourselves against the side of the wall like we had when we were kids. I felt the concrete beginning to tremble, and the tracks that were seven feet in front of us began to quiver as the train approached us. Frank squeezed my hand, and then the train rushed past us. I felt the vibration of the concrete behind me penetrating through my entire body, the wind blowing through my hair-- it was exhilarating. I looked over at Frank who was smiling back at me, and at the same time, we both began to yell, scream, and just make a lot of noise, releasing any built up emotions within us that we couldn't express earlier.