Lima Loser - Part Two.

I walked into the Glee club meeting the next day with my new guitar slung over my shoulder. I was a little late, so the meeting had already begun. I took a seat over by Blaze, who didn’t greet me at all.

“How many performances are left today?” Mr. Schue looked around the room. “If we finish them early, I’ll give you the third part of your classic rock assignment.”

“A third part?” Quinn complained. “Are you kidding me?”

“Not at all,” Mr. Schue shook his head. “But I promise that this part is a lot more fun and not so much work. You’ll like it.”

“When can we move on?” Santana glared at him. “Seriously. I wants to get my crunk on.”

“Soon enough, Santana,” he replied. “Be patient.”

“Mr. Schue?” Kurt raised his hand. “Tina and I are ready to perform, if that’s okay.”

“Sure it is,” Mr. Schue smiled. “Come on up.”

Both Kurt and Tina stood up at the same time. They both walked up on the stage and grabbed two stools on the side. They sat down. I heard Kurt whisper something to Tina. He pat her on the back, and then gestured for the band to begin.

Kurt: “Josie’s on a vacation, far away!
Come around and talk it over.
So many things that I wanna say.
You know I like my girls a little bit older.”

Tina: “I just wanna use your love toni-ight!”
Kurt: “I don't wanna lose your love toni-ight!”

Tina: “I ain't got many friends left to talk tooo.
Nowhere to run when I'm in trouble.
You know I'd do anything for you.
Stay the night, but keep it undercover.”

Kurt: “I just wanna use your love toni-ight!”
Tina: “I don't wanna lose your love toni-ight!”

Kurt and Tina: “Trying to stop my hands from shakin'.
Somethin' in my mind's not makin' sense.
It's been a while since we were all alone.
I can't hide the way I'm feeeeliiin'.”

Kurt: “As you leave me, please would you close the door,
and don't forget what I told you.
Just 'cause you're right - that don't mean I'm wrong.
Another shoulder to cry upon.”

Tina: “I just wanna use your love toni-ight!”
Kurt: “Ye-e-ah!
I don't wanna lose your love toni-ight!”
Tina: “Ye-eah!”

Kurt: “I just wanna use your love toni-ight!”
Tina: “I don't wanna lose your love toni-ight!”
Kurt: “I just wanna use your love toni-ight!”
Tina: “I don't wanna lose your love toni-iiiiiiiiight!

Kurt: “I don’t wanna, I don’t wanna, I don’t wanna!”

Kurt and Tina: “Toniiiiiiiiiight!”

The song ended, and we all gave them a round of applause. I really enjoyed their performance. I was so proud of Kurt for being a good sport about continuing the classic rock assignment, and I was proud of Tina for trying to get out of her shy phase. She was really succeeding with that. Yay.

“Love that song! You guys make a beautiful duet,” Mr. Schue told them. “Who’s up now?”

Blaze looked over at me, and spoke with absolutely no emotion in his voice. “Let’s get ours over with…”

But before we could raise our hands to go next, Santana stood up and took Kurt and Tina’s place on the stage. “Come on, Brittany!” she waved to Brittany, who didn’t seem like she was paying a whole lot of attention. Typical Brittany.

Brittany made her way up next to Santana, and then Santana spoke up. “Oh, by the way, what do we win?”

Mr. Schue looked at her, confused. “This isn’t a competition, Santana. But the next part will be.”

“Oh. Well, it should be. I don’t really work unless I get something out of it,” she folded her arms.

“Just perform, please. We don’t have a whole lot of time,” Schue informed her.

She muttered a “whatever”, and the band began to play.

Santana: “One way or another, I'm gonna find ya.
I'm gonna getcha, getcha, getcha, getcha!
One way or another, I'm gonna win ya.
I'm gonna getcha, getcha, getcha, getcha!
One way or another, I'm gonna see ya.
I'm gonna meetcha, meetcha, meetcha, meetcha!
One day, maybe next week.
I'm gonna meetcha, I'm gonna meetcha, I'll meetcha.”

Brittany: “IIIII wiiiiill drive past your house.
Annnnnd if the lights are all down,
I'll see who's arooooound.”

Santana: “One way or another, I'm gonna find ya.
I'm gonna getcha, getcha, getcha, getcha!
One way or another, I'm gonna win ya.
I'll getcha, I’ll getcha!
One way or another, I'm gonna see ya.
I'm gonna meetcha, meetcha, meetcha, meetcha!
One day, maybe next week.
I'm gonna meetcha, I'll meetcha.”

Brittany: “Annnnd if the lights are all out,
I'llll follow your bus downtown.
See who's hanging ooooout.”

There was a guitar solo here, so Santana and Brittany basically just went around the room and touched all of the guy members of Glee inappropriately. Well, Brittany was trying to feel me up at one point, but I awkwardly shifted around until she moved on to Mike.

I noticed Santana getting real close to Puck, and won’t deny that I got a little jealous. Her hands were all over him, and as much as I tried to avoid it and look away, I could see it from the corner of my eye. I wasn’t too happy about it, but Puck and I were just friends, so I couldn’t do anything about it.

Neither did he, though. He didn’t do anything back to her, but he didn’t push her away. Of course, he kept looking over at me to see if I was watching, but I pretended to bob my head to the music and be really into it. Santana and Brittany ran back up to the stage just in time for the singing to begin again.

Santana: “One way or another, I'm gonna lose ya.
I'm gonna give you the slip, a slip of the lip or another.
I'm gonna lose ya, I'm gonna trick ya, I’ll trick ya.
One way or another, I'm gonna lose ya.
I'm gonna trick ya, trick ya, trick ya, trick ya.
One way or another, I'm gonna lose ya.
I'm gonna give you the slip.”

Brittany: “I'll walk down the mall.
Stand over by the wall.
Where I can see it all.
Find out who ya call.
Lead you to the supermarket checkout.
Some specials and rat food, get lost in the crowd.”

Santana: “One way or another, I'm gonna getcha, I'll getcha, I'll getcha, getcha, getcha, getcha!”
Brittany: “(Where I can see it all, find out who ya call.)”
Santana: “One way or another, I'm gonna getcha, I'll getcha, I'll getcha, getcha, getcha, getcha!”
Brittany: “(Where I can see it all, find out who ya call.)”
Santana: “One way or another, I'm gonna getcha, I'll getcha, I'll getcha, getcha, getcha, getcha!”
Brittany: “(Where I can see it all, find out who ya call.)”
Santana: “One way or another, I'm gonna getcha, I'll getcha, I'll getcha, getcha, getcha, getcha!”

Santana ended off the song by going up to Brittany, grabbing her face, and making out with her right then and there. Everyone’s jaws dropped. Mine didn’t. I couldn’t expect anything less from Santana. She was obviously just doing it to get everyone’s attention, and it was working.

“Ahem,” Mr. Schuester broke off their kiss. “I enjoy that you’re expressing yourself, Santana, but this isn’t the place for PDA.”

The boys were loving it, though, of course. They were all on their feet (besides Artie), and whistling. Bunch of perverts, I thought to myself. I’m sure the female portion of the club were thinking the same thing to themselves.

“Excuse me, Mr. Schuester,” Rachel began. “I hardly think that was appropriate. That kiss basically just distracted everyone from a clearly flawed performance.”

Santana looked like she wanted to rip Rachel’s head off. “Look, grandma. Just because you don’t get any action doesn’t mean you can try to prevent anyone else from getting any.” She then hopped off of the side of the stage, making her Cheerio’s skirt fly up, which caused even more whistling.

Everyone laughed, but Mr. Schuester agreed with Rachel. “Rachel has a point, guys. There’s nothing wrong with adding things to your performance to make it more enjoyable, but don’t add distractions left and right. Make sure your talent shows. That being said, good job, Santana and Brittany! Great song choice and great energy. Just remember what I said.”

I knew that Brittany would have it forgotten in seconds, and Santana just didn’t care enough to remember. She did what she wanted, and didn’t give a shit about what anyone else thought. I admired her for that, but that only.

“Okay! Two more groups to go. Matt, Mike, Blaze, Courtney. Who’s up?” Mr. Schuester looked at the two groups left.

I glanced over at Matt, who was sitting on one side of me. “You guys can go if you want.”

“Thanks,” Matt replied. Both he and Mike stood up and walked up to the stage.

Mike grabbed one of the microphones. “This song is kind of depressing,” he spoke into it. “Good, but depressing. Hope you enjoy it, anyway.”

He nodded at Matt, who nodded at the band, and the song started. I knew that both guys on stage were epic dancers, but I doubted any dancing would be going on in this song.

Mike: “Ricky was a young boy!... He had a heart of stone.
Lived 9 to 5 and he worked his fingers to the bo-one!
Just barely out of school, came from the edge of town.
Fought like a switchblade so no one could take him down, no!
He had no money, no, no good at home!
He walked the streets a soldier and he fought the world alone
And now it's…”

Mike and Matt: “18 and life, you got it.
18 and life, you know!
Your crime is time and it's
18 and life to go!”

“18 and life, you got it.
18 and life, you know!
Your crime is time and it's
18 and life to gooooo!”

Matt: “Tequila in his heartbeat, his veins burned gasoliiine!
It kept his motor running, but it never kept him clean!
They say he loved adventure, "Ricky's the wild one!"
He married trouble and had a courtship with a gun.
Bang, bang shoot 'em up! The party never ends!
You can't think of dying when the bottle's your best friend,
And now it's…”

Mike and Matt: “18 and life, you got it.
18 and life, you know!
Your crime is time and it's
18 and life to go.”

“18 and life, you got it.
18 and life, you know!
Your crime is time and it's
18 and life to gooooooooooo. Yeah, yeah!”

Matt: “‘Accidents will happen’, they all heard Ricky say.”
Mike: He fired his six-shot to the wind and that child blew a child awa-a-a-ay!”

Matt: “18 and life, you got it.
18 and life, you know!
Your crime is time and it's
18 and life to go.”

Mike: “18 and life, you got it.
18 and life, you know!
Your crime is time and it's
18 and life to gooooooooooooooo!
Yeeeeeeeeeahhhhaaaaaaahhhh!
Ohh whoooaaa, whooooaaa, whooooooaaaaaaa!”

Well, Mike was right. Good but depressing song. I decided that although it was slow and sad, both Matt and Mike did an extraordinary job with their performance. It fit both of their voices, and it was a decent and meaningful classic rock song.

We all clapped for them as they came back down to their seats. I was in a great mood. Until, that is, Mr. Schuester told me that it was mine and Blaze’s turn to perform.

I looked over at Blaze, who didn’t seem to be too happy with it, either. But we knew we had to do it, so we both stood up. I took my new guitar (which I decided to name Betty, after the amazing Betty White), and trudged up to the stage. Blaze slowly followed behind. Once we were both settled on the stage, I spoke into the mic with no enthusiasm whatsoever. “Enjoy.”

I started off the song on my guitar, while Blaze just sat there, glaring back and forth out into the audience and at me.

Me: “She's a good girl, she loves her mama.
Loves Jesus and America, too.
She's a good girl, she’s crazy 'bout Elvis.
Loves horses, and her boyfriend, too.
Yeeeeeeeeah!”

Blaze: “It's a long day, livin’ in Reseda.
There's a freeway, runnin' through the yard.
And I'm a bad boy, ’cause I don't even miss her.
I'm a bad boy for breakin' her heart!”

Me and Blaze: “And I'm freeeeeee! Free fallin'!
Yeah, I'm freeeeeee! Free fallin'!”

Me: “All the vampires, walkin' through the valley.
Move west down Ventura Boulevard.
And all the bad boys are standin' in the shadows.
And the good girls are home with broken hearts.”

Me and Blaze: “Now I'm freeeeee! Free fallin'!
Yeah, I'm freeeeee! Free fallin'!”

Blaze: “Free fallin', now I'm, free fallin'.”
Me: “Free fallin’, now I'm free fallin’.”
Me and Blaze: “Free fallin’, now I’m free fallin’.
Free fallin’, now I’m free fallin’!”

Blaze: “I wanna glide down over Mulholland.
I wanna write her name in the sky.
Gonna free fall out into nothin'.
Gonna leave this world for a while!”

Me: “Now I'm freeeeee! Free fallin'!”
Blaze: “Yeah, I'm freeeeee! Free fallin'!”
Me: “Now I'm freeeeee! Free fallin'!”
Blaze: “Yeah, I'm freeeeee! Free fallin'!”
Me and Blaze: “Ohhhhhhh!”

I ended off the song with a few ridiculous strums on Betty. There were a few odd claps in the audience, but for the most part, everyone was fully aware that we sucked. Sure, it was loud, but loud didn’t always mean good. And why? Because Blaze Jagger was a dickhead.

Mr. Schuester clapped and smiled at us to be nice, but as we were getting off of the stage, he spoke. “I have a question…”

We both looked up at him.

“Where was the emotion in that song?” he asked.

“I have to be honest, I have no idea,” I replied, staring at the floor. “It turned out a lot better when we were practicing at my house.”

“No, it didn’t,” Blaze mumbled.

“He’s right,” I shrugged. “We weren’t feelin’ this one, Mr. Schue. Personal issues. I’m sorry for wasting the Glee club’s time.”

“It wasn’t a waste of time,” Mr. Schue shook his head. “It just wasn’t your best. I’m a little confused as to what happened to the rest of your amazing performances. This one didn’t seem very well-rehearsed or anything. It just seemed like you guys were doing it for fun. Minus the fun.”

I didn’t have an answer for him, so I just shrugged and sat down. Blaze sat way over next to Finn, who sat by Rachel, who just gave me a “what the fuck is wrong with you?” look.

“Well, I’m pretty sure Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers are just well, heartbroken right now,” I looked up to see Sue Sylvester standing in the doorway of the auditorium. “That performance was just unpleasant. I wasn’t sure if I heard a fire alarm or the Loch Ness Monster crying, so I assumed that it had something to do with Glee club. I decided to come check it out. Bad, bad idea.”

“Thanks, Sue, but we don’t need your input here,” Mr. Schuester waved as if to tell her to leave.

“Of course you do. What’s a dreadful show without Sue Sylvester’s opinion?”

“Please leave, Sue,” Mr. Schue rolled his eyes.

“Done. I should probably go make an appointment to get some new hearing aids, anyway,” she smiled, sarcastically. “And you should probably make an appointment to get a new hairstyle, William. You look like a lesbian version of Taylor Swift.”

She turned around and walked out of the auditorium, leaving Mr. Schuester even more insecure about his hair, and leaving me even more ashamed of my performance. Sue wasn’t really worth grieving over, but she was a woman in power, and she really knew how to bring someone down.

“Don’t listen to her, Blaze and Courtney. Your performance wasn’t awful, or even bad. It just wasn’t as awesome as usual,” Mr. Schuester tried to comfort us.

I smiled at him. “Thanks, Mr. Schue. Your hair isn’t as bad as she says it is, either. I can’t see you rocking anything else.”

He grinned, and then brought up the third and last part of the assignment. “Okay! So, are you guys ready for the third part of your assignment?”

“Either way, we have to do it,” Rachel frowned. “So, just tell us.”

“I want you all to split into two groups based on your gender,” Mr. Schue glanced at Kurt as he said this. “Each group will come up with a classic rock number for Friday, which is in two days. Costumes are highly recommended, and whichever group comes up with the best number, gets a prize.”

“What’s the prize?” Finn asked.

“The winning group gets a free dinner at Breadsticks,” Mr. Schue told us, and everyone began to freak out. What? Breadsticks was a big deal.

“AND that’s not all. The winning group also gets a free night at the Northshore Hotel, which is rated one of the best hotels in Ohio.”

Okay. After hearing this, I was seriously determined to beat the guys. I’d heard about Northshore, and apparently, it was amazing. I would do whatever I had to in order to win this competition.