Blah Blah Blah

“Listen, Taze, you don’t know if it’s even yours.”

I poured three mugs full of coffee and nodded in agreement. Patrick was calming Jonny down better than I had been. We were sitting at the kitchen island while Levi watched the Wiggles in the living room. Jonny clearly hadn’t slept at all, and from the looks of it he was about to have a complete breakdown.

I placed the coffee in front of him and in front of my husband, and then took a seat next to Patrick and sipped my own. Relief flooded through me, the caffeine fix. It was like therapy for me. Hopefully, just hopefully, it worked the same way for my best friend.

He buried his head in his hands, “Oh God, what am I going to do.”

Patrick sighed and reached over to pat Jonny on the shoulder, “First of all, go to the doctors with her. I want proof that this kid is yours, okay?”

“She said I’m the only person she’s slept with in months,” he groaned.

I scoffed, “I’ve seen this girl and I can assure you that you’re not the only guy she’s slept with in the last few months.”

“I’ll be damned if I let some bitch come in and try and one-up you for your money,” Patrick added, his hand still resting on his captain’s shoulder, “Or fame, or attention, I don’t care. It’s not going to happen.”

Jonathan lifted his head, “What if it’s mine though? What do I do then?”

The look in his eyes was haunting. It wasn’t only fear, it was utter despair. He wasn’t ready to be a father and he wasn’t ready to do so with some woman who was as good as a piece of trash left on the side of the road. I could almost see his life flashing in front of his eyes, the future that he was sure was over now that he might be having a child.

I sighed, “You make a choice.”

Patrick nodded, “In its life, or out of it.”

“I can’t be a father,” Jonny whispered. His lip quivered beyond his control, so he buried his head in his hands again to shield the both of us from watching.

“I did it,” Patrick reminded him, “If I can, buddy, you’ll be golden.”

Jonathan shoulders shook. I was sure he was crying. He shook his head but didn’t say anything more. My heart hurt for him, nobody deserved a shock like this. A part of me was angry, angry at the girl from the bar who had done who knows what to get where she was right now. She had Jonny in the palm of her hands, whether it was his or not. She was in control of his future right now, and that sickened me.

I looked through the opening to the next room and saw Levi shaking his butt, dancing to the Wiggles. Once you looked into your kid’s eyes for the first time, regret left your mind entirely. Even if it had been with another man, anybody, I would not love my son any less.

“Look how you are with Levi,” I said.

Jonny lifted his head and wiped his eyes with his sleeve, “I’m his uncle.”

“His cool uncle,” Patrick reminded him.

“But an uncle,” he said, his hands wrapping around his mug, “I don’t have the responsibilities that you guys do. I don’t have to yell at him or provide for him, or watch him every day.”

“If, God forbid, something happened to us,” I started, and watched his eyes flicker with something unknown, “Would you take care of him?”

“Of course,” he said quickly.

Patrick held out his hands, “Then you know you’d be a good guardian.”

Jonny didn’t say anything. We were right and he knew it. He loved Levi unconditionally and would drop everything to care for him if necessary. If he were to have a child, it would be the same thing. He would love his kid and care for his kid, nothing would matter except that.

“I just,” he shuddered; “Maybe if it were with...” he didn’t finish. He shook his head and took a drink of his coffee, the thought lost in the air.

“Maybe if it were with Danny?” I asked.

His eyes drifted up toward me and he nodded, sadly.

“It’ll all work out,” I told him, and I grabbed his hand from across the table, “I’ll make sure of that okay? For now, you might want to make sure she doesn’t go straight to the press. You don’t want a story coming from this before you have your answers.”

“Get a test done,” Patrick said.

“Can you even do that before the kid is born?” Jonathan asked.

“I think it’s expensive,” I said.

Patrick took out his phone and began typing into google. We waited quietly, the Wiggles being the only sound in the house. Levi giggled, and I couldn’t help but smile, his laugh still did something to my heart. Jonathan’s fingers tapped the table, his eyes locked on Patrick’s as he waited desperately for an answer. He needed this, he would drive himself crazy without it.

“Shit,” Patrick murmured and brought a hand through his hair, “It’s risky. They take blood from the mother, but there are fatal cells involved. Doctors don’t just do it for paternity.”

“And you don’t want that,” I assured Jon, “You want your child healthy.”

“Her child,” Pat corrected me, looking sharply away from his phone.

I rolled my eyes.

“Whatever,” I whispered, taking another sip, “I have to get Levi to his haircut. I’ll be back in a bit, okay?”

I leaned over and kissed Patrick sweetly on the cheek and then walked to Jonny. I wrapped my arms around him from behind and squeezed. His hands lifted to my arms. I wanted to tell him that he was ready, but I couldn’t tell him anything that I wasn’t sure of. Being ready was up to him.

“Thanks Leah,” he whispered.
“Of course, Jonny,”



I walked back into the house with Levi sleeping in my arms. He was so tired that he almost fell asleep in the chair. His little Mohawk looked cute and sharp though, his lovely blonde baby hairs sculpted like a true rock star.

The house was quiet. I put Levi to bed and covered him up with his Blackhawk blanket before returning down stairs. Patrick was in the kitchen, stirring something on the stove. Jonathan had left, and I was kind of relieved, because it was stressing me out too. I needed to think before I acted on this one.

Patrick looked up, “Hey babe.”

I sighed, and wrapped my arms around his middle, “Hey.”

“Where’s my boy?” he asked, pouring a spice into the water.

“He fell asleep, so I put him to bed,” I rested my head on his muscular back, “He looks cute though.”

Patrick nodded and rested the spoon on the top of the pot. He turned around and leaned against the stove, wrapping his arms around me, pulling me into him. He kissed my head and let out a low breath. Obviously, I wasn’t the only one stressing out about Jonny.

“I feel awful,” I admitted.

“I know,” he said, his hands rubbing my back, “We’ll figure it out though.”

“He’s going to be a wreck for nine months,” I added.

“Let’s forget about it for a bit okay?” he said quietly, “Our free time was cut short, right now this is a vacation.”

I smiled, squeezing him tightly, “I love you, my big bear.”

“I love you too, Lee,” he said, “And I love that sexy red lingerie on you, too.”

I grinned and pulled away from him, raising an eyebrow, “Did you, Mr. Kane?”

Patrick nodded, a smirk spreading on his lips, “Thinking about it even gets to me. It’s not every day you dress up for me.”

I grabbed his hand, “I don’t always feel sexy after cleaning up Levi’s stained pants and vomit,” I said, “I’m sorry I don’t anymore.”

“Way to ruin the mood,” he joked, but he brushed his thumb over my hand, “You’re sexy even if you’re in my sweater with your hair on the top of your head.”

I blushed lightly, “Shh.”

“I’m serious,” he whispered, “I still want you, more and more every day.”

I looked up at him and dropped his hand. Without a word I lifted my shirt over my head. He watched, quietly, raising an eyebrow. Then, I undid my jeans and let them drop to the floor too. I stood in front of him, in my black bra and underwear. His eyes fell from mine, trailing over my body.

“Mr. Kane,” I said, undoing my bra. I dropped it next to my shirt.

“Hmm?” He whispered.

I stepped toward him and snuck my hands under his shirt, “Babe?”

He looked at me in the eyes, lust filling his features, “You’re killing me.”

“I’m feeling kind of tired,” I whispered.

He nodded, reaching back to shut the stove off without looking away from me. His hands found my waist, and they pulled me as close as possible to his frame. I felt his abs underneath shirt, he shuddered.

“Take me to bed?” I said quietly.

He kissed me roughly, pushing me back to the island. He lifted me up, sitting me on the top of the granite. His lips found my neck and his hands fumbled with his belt. A whole bunch of thoughts went through my head, motherly thoughts. I would have to clean this kitchen thoroughly because my child eats and sits in here. If Levi woke up and wandered down here, we didn’t have a locked door to shield us, and he way too young to have this explained to him.

He stopped kissing my neck and looked into my eyes, “Are you okay?”

I nodded, touching his cheek sweetly, “I love you.”

He smiled, kissing me softly, “I love you too.”

“Can we do this more often,” I asked, pulling him closer by wrapping my legs around his waist.

He smirked, “Anytime you want.”