The Way She Wears My Clothes

“Sierra? Where’d you go?” I called out, walking through the maze of halls. The venue we’d booked was big, one of the biggest we’d played this time around. Sierra had pulled me from my bus as I was just waking up, demanded I follow her and then had been taking seemingly random turns whenever she wanted. I’d seemed to have lost her, until she popped back around the corner and grinned. She grabbed my hand and hauled me along.

“No dawdling, Jack. We must be on time. Don’t want to keep Plan B waiting.”

“Yeah, about Plan B. What happened to Plan A? You never called me.”

“She wouldn’t have anything of it. She wouldn’t listen, tuned out as soon as we started to talk about it. She just wouldn’t, Jack. It’s up to you now. And Jack?” she said as she opened a door near us.

“What?”

“I’m sorry,” she shoved me inside and I heard a lock click. This had to be the only door in the entire venue that locked from the outside, and of course, Sierra found it. I turned and gasped. Taylor was sitting in a chair, looking rather angry, with her arms crossed over her chest. A single bulb hung from the ceiling, illuminating the small space. It was a small room, barely bigger than a closet. We were surrounded by shelves that were stocked with cleaning supplies. There was a few mop buckets behind Tay, beside a floor sink and there were brooms propped up on all sides of us. We were in the janitor’s closet, locked in and alone.

“This is not a good Plan B, Sierra Kusterbeck!” I hollered.

“So you were a part of this? I should’ve known! You can’t live well-enough alone, can you? I told you that I do-“

“Excuse me. You didn’t actually TELL me anything. You didn’t this heartbreaking head shake like, let it go, Jack, you’re not good enough.”

She stared at me for a moment.

“Wait, repeat that,” she said softly.

“No, you know what I mean, Tay. We’re not meant for each other, I get it.”

She chewed on her lip. I leaned against the door and then slid down the wood. I took a good look at Tay Jardine, and cursed to myself when I noticed her shirt. She was wearing another goddamn JAGK shirt. I put my head in my hands and breathed slowly.

“Jack, I have a question,” she said gently, as if she were scared to speak too loud, or too harsh.

“What could you possibly want to know?” I asked, a little too sharply.

“Nothing, forget it. It wasn’t important.”

I shook my head.

“This was stupid. I don’t want to do this anymore, Sierra!” I called out over my shoulder. With my luck, Cass and Sierra had locked us in here, and wouldn’t be back until the show. It seemed like a pretty Sierra-thing to do.

“Why are you giving up now that she locked you in here with me?”

“Because, you don’t want me and I have to accept that. I have to accept that and move on, because I can’t spend all of my time pining after you.”

“Why wouldn’t I want you?” she asked.

“Seriously? I’m awkward and childish. I make stupid jokes and suck at relationships. Out of the entire human race, I don’t see why anyone would pick me. I’m not right for anyone.”

Her face contorted for a few moments, displaying a look of pure confusion. Her eyebrows pulled together, her lips pursed and she stared hard at the floor. She looked up at me and finally broke the silence, asking, “Jack, who told you that you weren’t right for anyone?”

“No one, not with as many words. I’ve figured it out over the years. I’m not good enough for you, or any of the girls I’ve dated before.”

“Shut up.”

“Why? Because you know it’s true?”

“No, Jack, it’s not.”

She slid off the chair and knelt in front of me. She took my hands and played with my fingers for a while. She didn’t say anything, just slotted and reslotted our fingers together. I didn’t disturb the silence that fell over us like a blanket. I liked it, the way her skin felt on mine in the small, private space.

“Jack, it’s not true, because I want you.”

“No, you d-“

“Shut up and listen to me,” she interrupted. I shut my mouth and wrinkled my nose at her.

She took a moment to finish collecting her thoughts before she spoke up again.

“Let me tell you something. And I want you to just listen, and not interrupt me.”

She stopped and just looked at me.

“I promise I’ll shut up,” I said with a smile. She leaned forward and kissed my nose.

“Jack, it seems to me that you don’t think very highly of yourself. And I can’t quite figure out why. You’re not awkward or childish. I mean, yeah, you do suck at making mature jokes but you’re funny. And so far, you’re better at this relationship than I am, so that’s something. I don’t know why you think that you’re not good enough for me, because in no way, shape or form, have I ever been better than you. Do you know why I said what I did the other day?”

I shook my head. Sierra had tried to enlighten me on it, but I hadn’t been very perceptive. It went in one ear and right back out the other.

“The thought of being with you terrifies me, Jack.”

“Well, I guess I’ll just go then, if it’s that scary.”

“Shut up,” she instructed. “It’s not scary enough to keep me away, though. This entire tour, I’ve been trying to get you to notice me, to see that I want to know you, and kiss you, and be with you. But at the same time, I don’t want you to hurt me. I’ve had some pretty bad relationships before, and I didn’t want that to be the case.”

“I wouldn’t dream of hurting you,” I muttered, shuffling closer to her. She unlaced our fingers so she could cup my jaw in her hands. I moved my hands to her hair, brushing it out of her face. She leaned in and kissed me, soft and gently. I slid my hands into the thick curly mess that was Tay Jardine’s hair. She moved into my lap, straddling my legs as she deepened the kiss. I pressed one hand into her back as I pressed forward into her.

The door opened behind us and I heard immature snickering, the likes of which only came from one person. I broke the kiss and said hello to my best friend, Alex Gaskarth.

“What are you guys doing locked in a supply closet?” Rian asked. Tay stood up off of me and offered her hand. I took it and stood up with her.

“Your girlfriends locked us in here,” I said, turning to face the pair. Peeking out from the ends of the hall were Sierra and Cassadee, grinning like mischievous devils.

“Well, looks like the plan worked,” Rian said, smiling.

“We’ll leave you two alone,” Alex said, dragging Rian away to Cass and then kissing Sierra to distract her. I shook my head.

“My friends, I swear,” I stopped and looked at Tay who was beaming up at me.

“I never would’ve plucked up the courage without Cass and Sierra, so, I’m grateful that they like to meddle,” she said. I nodded and leaned down to kiss her. I don’t think I could ever get used to this. It was just so perfect, the way her lips felt on mine, and the way her hands clutched at my shirt to keep me close.

“I was so stupid,” she muttered.

“Hmmm?” I hummed in response.

“For thinking that this wasn’t worth the risk, I was just so naïve. I’m sorry, Jack.”

“Don’t be. We’re here now. It’s okay.”

She nodded.

“Yeah, we’re here now.”