Where You Belong

“So she took your kid and left?” Marchie asked, rubbing the back of his neck. “Can she do that?” He asked.

“Yes, she can do that.” Tyler nodded, his head hung low down between his shoulders as he took another drink of the beer that Marchie had brought over. It had been two days since Anna had left for home with Aidan and even though she would send him pictures of the baby, he still missed the two of them terribly. “What did I do wrong?” Tyler asked.

“You got her pregnant when you’re nineteen and she’s twenty-two.” He pointed out.

“I bought her a house, I took her on trips, I made a good life for her and Aidan here. I asked her to marry me.” He sighed, running a hand over his newly buzzed hair.

“Hasn’t she fought you all the way about it, though? Didn’t want to move, didn’t need to go out to Montreal or Toronto, didn’t want you to take care of her?” He asked. “She’s not some Disney Princess who waits to be swept up, Tyler, she has her own life going on.” He explained, making Tyler look at him oddly. “I have sisters.” He shrugged. “Besides, she loved that job at the school and now that’s gone, it’s kind of ended up that she’s completely dependent on you. What’s she supposed to do when you two fall apart?”

“I guess I never considered that to be an option.” Tyler said, getting up and grabbing another slice of pizza from the box on the countertop. He skipped the rest of the conversation; passing the family room that Anna had spent weeks decorating and went straight upstairs.

“Alright then.” Brad sighed, getting up and letting himself out.

Tyler bypassed the master bedroom, lazily walking to Aidan’s nursery, still finishing off his beer as he slumped down in the rocking chair. Putting his feet up, he grabbed his cell phone and started flipping through photos of Aidan that Anna had sent him the night before so he knew that they were safe and everything was fine. Everything was fine, wasn’t it? He was doing exactly what he should have, made a comfortable life for the woman who was the mother of his child and center of his affection.

He taped his call button twice, going straight to Anna’s cell. It only rang twice before she picked up.

“Hi Ty.” She spoke gently.

“Hey, “ he replied, rocking back and forth in the chair.

“What’s up” She asked, still speaking quietly.

“Am I calling at a bad time?” He asked.

“No, no, I just put Aidan down and I was in the room with him.” She said, her volume getting louder.

“Just seeing how things were going I guess.” He mumbled softly. “I miss you.” He said, running a hand over his head again, taking a sip of his beer when he got nothing in return but a sad sigh.

“I miss you, too.” She replied softly.

“I don’t really know what to do without you here,” he laughed at himself for being so vulnerable.

“I want to come home,” Anna insisted, “I just need time to figure a few things out.” She finished.

“But you’re coming home to me, right?” He asked tentatively to receive silence once again. “It’s getting late, I should let you go.” His brain began to skip.

“Tyler, I – “

“I’ll call you tomrrow? To talk to the big guy?” He asked.

“…Yeah that sounds good.” Anna sighed softly. “I’ll talk to you then.” She said quietly. “Night Ty.”

“Night Anna.” He replied before she could end the call. “I love you.” He wanted to throw his phone against the wall, but shortly after she ended the call, it vibrated.

From: Marchie
why don’t u go after her?

Tyler rocked back and forth in Aidan’s chair for a moment before asking himself the same question. Why didn’t he go after her?

•••

Tyler prayed he was at the right house when his rental rolled up to a nice two-story in the west side of Pittsburgh. He faintly remembered Anna’s parents address when she’d receive mail from them and sure he felt like a creep looking it up but he had to do what he had to do.

“Tyler, hi.” He recognized Anna’s mother when she swung the door open.

“Hi Carol.” Tyler rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.

“I wondered how long it would take for you to come around.” She smiled gently. “Don’t let this be a mistake,” she added. “I really want you two to work this out.” She said, placing her hand on Tyler’s shoulder. “Plus her Daddy isnt’ home yet, but you better steer clear when he does.” She warned.

Tyler nodded his head as he shifted from foot to foot, already able to smell her perfume.

“Up the stairs and to the back of the hall, last door on the right.” She instructed, stepping aside. Tyler gave her another grateful smile before following her directions, walking quietly down the hall. He could hear her soft voice singing – the same song she usually hummed to the baby boy when he was being fussy before his nap. He stood in the doorway for a moment, watching as she paced what he assumed was her bedroom, a bounce in her step as she patted his little diaper butt which usually calmed him down.

He didn’t realize how much he missed her until he could see her again.

“Can I come in?” He spoke softly, not wanting to startle her.

“Tyler.” Anna’s eyes grew wide upon seeing him in the hallway of her home in Pittsburgh, hundreds of miles away from Boston. “What are you doing here?” She asked, frowning softly.

“I needed to see you,” he spoke gently. “I missed you, I missed Aidan.” He gestured to the baby who was looking up at his Daddy with his big, imploring eyes. “I just needed to see you.” He repeated.

“I um, I…” Anna was at a loss for words. It was so hard being around Tyler. She loved him, she did, but she just didn’t know how to make this work.

“I was thinking maybe we could go for a walk.” Tyler suggested softly, “I’ve got the pram in the car.” He confessed, stopping at a Target after renting the car that got him from the airport to her suburban home. Anna weighed her options.

“Let me change?” She asked, ushering down to her outfit of rolled sweats from her college and a grey t-shirt, one of Aidan’s towels over shoulder.

“Sure, let me see the big guy.” Tyler nodded, reaching for his son. Anna shifted a happy, gurgling Aidan from her arms to Tyler’s hands, shivering as his fingertips grazed her arms. Tyler grinned widely, holding Aidan up high and bouncing him before swooping him down into his arms. “Hey baby boy, Daddy missed you.” He cooed, kissing all over Aidan’s small face. It made Anna’s heart hurt to know that she was the reason they had separated, it was something she didn’t want to feel ever again. She didn’t know what she would do if Tyler had ever taken Aidan from her.

Anna shrugged into an old pair of jeans and one of the v-necks she had packed, layering it over a white lace tank and braiding her hair over her shoulder. She headed downstairs where she could hear the warm bass of Tyler’s voice as he spoke to Aida.

“Daddy missed you so much.” He snuggled, “I know you’re having a good time with Mama, but we miss you in Boston. Marchie has no one else to hang around with without his shirt on.” He whispered, making Anna giggle. Tyler smiled up at her. “You look really nice.” He complimented, watching the blood rush to her cheeks as she tucked a loose hair behind her ear.

“I look awful.” She flushed deeper, “haven’t really been sleeping.” She added gently. Tyler stayed quiet and strapped Aidan down into his stroller.

“Maybe we could take a tour of the neighborhood?” He suggested softly. He knew that he needed to be strong for Anna and take charge in the situation.

The two left her cul-de-sac and wandered aimlessly, Tyler baby-talking to Aidan as she walked along. It was odd being side by side with Tyler and not holding his hand. Looking up at him, shielding her eyes from the bright sunlight, she realized how much more of a man he looked than when she had first met him. There’s no way she would have mistaken him for a sixteen year old now.

“So I was talking to my friend Kyle, he works at admissions at BC.” Tyler began, knowing that they’d have to start talking sometime. “I remember that you said that you had thought about getting your Master’s and he said that the have lots of night classes and flexible courses for people who return to school.” He suggested.

“Tyler I don’t know… maybe, maybe I should just stay home with Aidan.” She shrugged. “I want to be with you, it took me a while to realize that, and I’ll do whatever it takes to stay with you.” She stopped walking as they faced a small opening where there was an empty sandbox.

Tyler turned to face Anna. “I don’t want you to give up on your dreams for me.” Tyler said, brushing a hand over her cheek. “That’s not what this is about. If this is going to work, we both need to be happy. If we have to get a nanny, we’ll get a nanny, I will run a daycare if I have to, but you need to do what you need to do so that you feel as fulfilled as I do when I play hockey.” He explained as she stepped into him. “I want that for you.” Anna smiled, her eyes water as she looked up at him, her lashes heavy with tears.

“I just… sometimes I don’t know where I belong… like I can’t fit into this whole Bruins’ wives and girlfriends thing.” She sighed, running a hand through her bangs, brushing them from her forehead.

“I want to help you figure that out.” Tyler whispered. “I don’t need you do be anyone other than yourself. I will do anything to make sure you’re happy, but we’re in this together. It’s not me or you against the world, it’s the two of us – together.” Anna too a deep breath before shaking her head softly.

“No, it’s the three of us.” She whispered softly.

“I just want you to know, someday I’m going to make you my wife. I’ll wait, and you’re going to fight me about it –” he paused to laugh softly through the tears that ran down both of their cheeks. “But I’m going to call you my wife.”

“Only if I can call you my husband, too.” She said, tucking herself into his chest.

“We’re your family, Anna. You belong with us.” He whispered into her hair.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “I never meant to take Aidan away, I just, I needed to clear my head and – ”

“It’s okay.” Tyler cut her off, “I know you’d never do that with bad intent.” He insisted. “I just miss you at home, and if you don’t feel at home there, we can find a new place.” He offered. “But we’re going to be together – the three of us – that’s where you belong.” He finished. Anna nodded, letting him hold her tightly as she familiarized herself with his heartbeat once again.

I know you haven’t made your mind up yet, but I would never do you wrong. I’ve known it from the moment that we met – no doubt in my mind where you belong.

I could make you happy, make your dreams come true - nothing that I wouldn’t do. Go to the ends of the earth for you, to make you feel my love.