It Wasn't Meant to Be Like This

The first day of London was spent mostly sleeping, Jack had booked a room together which meant I was stuck on the couch for a week because I promised Beth to keep it non-weird and she could have the bed.

The first day of us being tourists was amazing, if only we were a couple it would have been an amazing, but you can’t get what you want all the time. So I settled for it. I’ve took so many pictures, I’m surprised I haven’t got an injury in my fingers from clicking so much. Beth is fascinated by everything, you should see her. She’s like a child, seeing the world for the first time. She acts like a child too, she skips and giggles with her stunning brunette curls swaying down her back. She occasionally links arms with me and we do that thing were you step over each other’s legs, we look like idiots but I don’t think she cared, I didn’t care either.

We went on the London Eye, it was so cool. We lined up for our tickets and Beth almost squeals when we step inside, luckily we got very few people in our booth, because it was lunchtime so not many people went on the London Eye I guess.

We had our faces against the window, pointing everything out that London stood for, Big Ben, Westminster Bridge, the River Thames. There was so much to see. Beth insisted on having photos done, we had some together too. A nice elderly couple took a few shots and muttered how adorable we were. Neither Beth or I corrected them. It was like a different world here, the way things worked.

It wasn’t till our fourth day here, Jack called me.

“Hello?” I say, yawning. It was early in the morning which meant it was late over there.

“Hullo Guv’nor!” It was Jack, by the sound of his lazy accent.
“Jack, it’s like 6am. What you doing…” I whisper, noticing Beth was still fast asleep. I decided to escape out onto the balcony. The room was great by the way, we had our own balcony that overviews the busy town of London.

“Sorry, I just need to ask you a favour” Jack says, I sighed.
“I’m doing you one now aren’t I?” I say, feeling irritable that I had lost slip. Also it was Jack that was calling me, I suddenly felt bitter.

“I know, I know, look I called your hotel. They told me that tonight is a formal night, where you dress up and dance and shit.” Jack tells me.

I wanted to slap him, he called me just to tell what events were on in the hotel. I had a newspaper for that.

“Please say you didn’t call me just to say that” I mutter, rubbing my eyes. I yawned again, sucking in the cold air.

“No, course not. I want you to go out today and get Beth a new dress, anything she wants and I’ll pay for it. Then I want you to take her to this thing tonight and make sure she has a good time” Jack says, and I smiled slightly. He did really want her to be happy didn’t he?

“I would Jack but I can’t afford those dinner prices, or the drinks” I say, feeling guilty that I physically wouldn’t able to do it.

“No worries, I’ve sorted it out. Just give your names and you’re settled for the night. Drinks and dinner on me” Jack says.

Jeez, since when was he made of money?

“Jack-” I begin.

“Please Finn, I’m begging you. I feel really bad about what happened. She still won’t pick up her phone. I just want to make sure she has a good time. Please” Jack begs and I knew I couldn’t say no, one reason being because even though I had some kind of sick hatred for him. He was my best friend.

The other reason, that I technically had a ‘date’ with Beth tonight and there was no way I was giving that up.

“Sure Jack. I’ll do it” I say, smiling widely.

Jack sighs with relief “Thanks man, you’re the best” Jack says and I feel guilty again, after wishing me a good night. Jack hangs up and I crawl back into the room, the warmth of the sheets were like heaven to me.

I tried to go back to sleep, but I knew I had no chance of going back to sleep. No, not now when I had a night with Beth, a possibly romantic night.

Thank you God, for answering my prayers.

--

“So, what we doing today?” Beth asks me, as I was pulling on my t-shirt, I noticed she looked and it boosted my ego.

She was straightening her hair, looking in the big mirror as she did. We had sorted a routine some how, she’d get ready first as she took longer and while she did that, I had a shower and threw on some clothes. We seemed to work in harmony actually.

“Um, shopping.” I say, putting some socks on.

“We went shopping yesterday” Beth laughs, noticing the 10 bags in the corner full of souvenirs and clothes.

I had gotten April and Mom so much stuff. I couldn’t wait to see their faces.

“No, like fancy shopping” I say, trying to find my other grey pump, I wasn’t having any luck.
“Why, we’re not going anywhere fancy” Beth says, she had now pulled her hair up and I didn’t want her too.

“Don’t” I say, without finishing my sentence. Beth stopped what she was doing and turned to me, confused.

“What?” she asks.
“Don’t pull your hair up, it looks nice” I say, feeling myself blush slightly. Oh my god.

Beth half smiles, and nods and combs her hair out. “So why we going fancy shopping?”

I looked up, and see her holding my grey pump. I take it gratefully. “Jack called me this morning, he wants us to go this formal night” I say and Beth looks at me, her bottom lip between her teeth, her eyebrow furrowing slightly, her face looked annoyed.

“Jack called?” she repeats. I nod slowly, and walk over to the vanity table, grabbing the brush and combing my hair through messily.

“Why does he want us to go shopping then?” Beth asks, confused.
“To get a new dress for you, rent a tux for me. He wants us to have a good time” I say, it felt awkward between us now. Whenever Jack was mentioned, it got awkward.

“But I am having a good time” Beth says softly, and when I looked at her. I wanted to kiss her, I wanted to feel her lips again. I didn’t give a fuck about Jack.

“Don’t you want to go?” I ask and Beth shakes her head.
“Will their be dancing?” she asks and I nod, confused.

Beth grins widely “Yeah, I want to go” she says and finishes off doing her makeup, not that she needed it. She was beautiful anyway. I had seen her in the mornings before, but seeing her all to myself. Well, that’s just a bonus. I had walked in the bathroom once and she had just gotten out the shower. I almost died and went to heaven. But then I realized, I been in hell anyways for the amount feelings I had for her.

It was unexplainable, how it all worked. I knew that if Jack and Beth happened to break up, I could never be with her anyway because theirs always an unwritten rule that you never date a friend’s ex. I knew that no matter what happened, I would be in love with a girl I’ll never, ever get. Even if Jack does something stupid and break her heart. I still can’t be the one to fix it.

“You ready?” I ask and Beth nods, her dangly earrings shaking and I was amused by this. We grabbed our jackets, as it was much colder over here in London that California. We left the hotel and went out and got some breakfast, my treat.

Beth and I were walking, linked arms again and we came to the first shop which looked fairly fancy.

“After you m’lady” I say and Beth chuckles, dragging me in the shop with her. I was never one for shopping, I never have been it’s not something I particular enjoy. But when Beth whizzed off to get changed and I had to sit on a stupid stool, looking like a pervert sitting outside the ladies changing room. When she appeared, wearing dress number one. A little black number that looked stunning on her, showing off her fabulous long tanned legs. I suddenly loved shopping.

I noticed the teenage girls near by, glaring at Beth with envy and I couldn’t help smirk, as one guy looked at Beth, then nodded at me in somewhat approval. I wasn’t going to correct him, I would love people to think that Beth was my girlfriend and not my best friend’s.

It wasn’t till an hour later, Beth had modelled countless dresses and they all looked good on her, but she never listened to what I said. She always found something wrong with it.

“Hey Finn!” Beth calls from the stall, nearest to where I was and the exit of the changing rooms.

“Yeah?” I call back, leaning against the entrance wall. One little girl was swirling around in a lemon coloured dress, giggling happily. Her mother gushing on beautiful she looked. It was a moment where a picture could have kept that moment forever.

“I need help, this one zips up at the back” Beth says and I instantly felt nervous. I cleared my throat uncomfortably. She wanted me to help…zip her dress up?

I wouldn’t be able to control myself, with her so close to me with such little clothing on.
“Um, okay” I say, feeling stupider by the second. Beth unlocks the door and I open it and quickly walk in. It was a medium sized room, but it was full of dresses all hung up on hangers. Beth’s clothes that she put on that morning, discarded on the floor.

Beth was looking in the mirror, all hair on one side., looking at me, waiting for me to help her. She was wearing a purple dress this time and against her tanned complexion, it looked good. I could see her spinal bones tracing up her back, her black bra strap visible. I have never felt so turned on, over a freaking bra strap.

I smile uneasily and Beth looks at me, patiently. I, with shaky hands go to zip up her dress, her beautiful skin disappearing from my view. It went up flawlessly and soon, my moment was over. Beth turned around, the dress swishing slightly.

It was silky dress that clutching to her body effortlessly, with diamond sequins on the chest and trailed down to her thigh, it was a floor length dress, but their was a huge, visible slit down the right leg, which added a whole new range of sexiness.

She looked beautiful and I was lost for words, I couldn’t explain the jealously I felt that Jack owned such a beautiful, amazing girl.

“What you think?” she asks, sounding nervous. But I must have been mistaken. I couldn’t speak, my throat dry and my brain thinking too much of how better she would look without the dress. Don’t complain, I’m a male and I think of these things daily.

“I-I-I” I stutter, but nothing came on. Beth looked disheartened.

“Is it bad?” she asks, biting her lip which just turned on the fantasies in my head again.
“No!” I say, a bit too loudly.

Beth looked startled. “No, sorry. You looked beautiful, really. You look amazing Beth” I say gently, truly meaning my words but she would never know this.

Beth smiles, a smile that made tiny crinkles near her eyes which gave them a slight spark, a smile that showed off her pearly white teeth and a smile that made me fall in love with her repeatedly.

“Thanks Finn” she breathes, turning around and facing the mirror again, smoothing the dress down her hips. She smiled with confidence and I like to think I gave her that.

“This is the one” she says and I smiled, agreeing with her. We brought the dress, but my mind wasn’t thinking of anything but that smile she gave me.

Next, it was time for me to find a tux to wear tonight. I didn’t really care about it as long I didn’t look stupid.

I tried on different pants, shirts and jackets and ties and Beth said they weren’t the right ones. I eventually decided on a plain and simple, black tux. I tried on the outfit, trying to put on my bow tie.
I was failing, in the end I went out and saw Beth, sitting neatly crossed legs and watching the people around her.

“Beth? Little help?” I ask, and she looks at me and giggles when she sees I was unable to tie my bow tie. Beth chuckled again and walked up to my, one leg in of the other. She got close to me and started to my tie. She was so close, I could kiss her. I could kiss her right now.

Beth pulled it tight for me and smiled with content. I turned around, and walked to the floor length mirror. I looked alright, I guess. It was simple.

“How is it?” I ask, seeing Beth behind me, watching me as I sorted out the cuffs and straightened the tie again.

Beth kept watching me and sudden amount of attraction built between us.

“It’s good” she says and I smile, as she sounded a bit dreamy.

“You look great Finn” she corrects herself and I smile, pleased.

“Alright, let’s go then” I say and go back in to get changed. I couldn’t stop smiling, as I knew Beth had trouble talking then, just like I had earlier.

Maybe, I wasn’t the only with feelings for each other.
Maybe, maybe somehow. She does like me, just a little bit.

A guy can dream right?