Billie Joe Armstrong Is My Step-Father...and I Hate It

“GRAAAAAAAACE!” It seems my name was getting quite over-said in this house. Everyone was screaming it to get my attention. It seemed like everyone wanted to tell me something. Or sneer at me if you count Joey or Billie. Billie doesn’t really sneer at me, to be honest. More like... winds me up unintentionally. But he still winds me up. Brushes up up the wrong way. And when someone brushes ME up the wrong way... they don’t live for much longer.

Joey arrived at my door. “Oh, there you are” he smiled.

“What do you want?” I hissed. “Can’t you see I’m busy wallowing in my plots?”

“I wanted to tell... damn, I forgot now” he made a face of deep thought when he tried to think of what he was to say. “Hold on, give me a minute.”

“Don’t think too hard, you’ll end up getting hurt” Billie said, who happened to be walking across the hallway. “You spend a lot of time in your room, Grace.”

“I’m thinking” I hissed.

“Joey, go away for a sec” Billie said.

“Hey, this isn’t your house, I can stay here if I want to!” Joey protested. I was about to team with him until he left. Fuck, no! I wanted to scream for him to come back and talk to me to get out of talking to Billie. As well as that, Joey seemed to be the only one who understood, even though he quite liked my mum. It was hard not to like my mum, really. Billie edged closer to my doorway.

“What?” I seethed, looking out the window.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked softly. “And you may as well let me in, coz I’m not leaving until you do.” I was silent. I shrugged, indifferent to his sentence. “S’at a yes?” I shrugged again. So he took his chances and entered my room, sitting on the bed beside me. “So, what is it your thinking about?”

“It wasn’t how nice you were anyway” I hissed, refusing to look at him.

“I figured” he said. I could hear the amused smile over his face. What I wouldn’t do to wipe it off his face... “So, what was it?”

“What’s it to do with you?” I asked, gruffly.

“Because I know whatever it was, it was about me, wasn’t it?” he asked. It was. I often thought about him getting hurt in different ways to pass the time. But it seemed to go slower. I shrugged again. “C’mon Grace, I’m trying!”

“Let’s get one thing straight here, shall we?” I asked, turning around to look at him for the first time. “I hate you. And you know that, so why do you try?”

“Because Grace. I like you, you’re awesome” he laughed. “And I want you to like me but you just seem to want to blank me out all the time.”

“You should know why, fucker. You went through it” I said, looking out my window again.

“Yea but... but... but that was different...” he said, clearly knowing I had victory. I smirked.

“How so?”

“... never mind about what I did! I’m talking about you. I’m being so nice to you, Grace. And even if you ever like me-!”

“Which I never will.”

“- I’m gonna keep being nice to you because I like you! I want us to be friends” he said, in a pleading voice. I looked at him. He blinked his green eyes innocently in that way he does, pretending to be five yerars old.

Fuck, I almost smiled.

“Don’t think I know what your doing” I said, when I got a hold of myself, quick enough not to smile at all. “You think you can blink those green eyes and I’ll melt, just like mum. I won’t. And another thing...” I leaned closer to his face, scowling, “I will never accept you as my step father. Ever.” I looked away again.

“Don’t think I’m gonna stop trying Grace” he said, in an extremely annoying tone of voice, as if to say he knew it all. I would’ve killed just to smack him around the face at this point. “I’m just gonna bounce back.”

“Don’t even think about poking your mind around my head” I said, turning to him again.

“You’re afraid of getting hurt, aren’t you? Again?” he asked. I blinked, in shock. Who was he to read my mind?! And why was the tiny voice at the back of my mind agreeing?!

“NO! Leave me alone!” I yelled, suddenly. I turned violently away from him.

“Fine” he said. “But, if I ever do marry your mother, I’m gonna love you like a real father would. Whether you like it or not.” And with that, he left. His words were becoming stale in my head. He’ll take care of me if it were up to him. He wants to love me like a daughter. Like his daughter.

WELL, FUCK ALL!

He wasn’t getting anywhere near me! Anger boiled like acid in the pit of my stomach, it felt like a nuclear explosion in my gut. My hands curled into tight fists and I sat up. I was going to DESTROY that guy. Most pepole would think I will make his life a living hell. They would think I wanted to kill him, I wanted to see his guts across my bedroom floor. Think I wanted to see him get eaten by a fucking lion.

No. I know what I wanted.

I wanted him to be hurt on the inside. I want him to be hurt by the power of my mother. I want to see him have a mental breakdown because mum doesn’t LOVE him. But that won’t happen. To hell it will. I hate to admit it, but mum adores Billie too much. And that’s what scares me. I was afraid she’ll get hurt by him. I’ll be left to pick up the pieces. Mum would be shattered. In fact, she was only barely glued together after the whole incident. I got up and walked across the hallway. I heard Billie playing his gutair. Not that I liked to admit it, but he was pretty damn good. I decided to play spy on him.

I knelt beside the bedroom door, where mum and him slept and listened. There was no words, but occasionally, he would write a few things down. But, basically, all I could hear being played was soft strums from his gutair. It was one of them slow songs.

“Billie! Can you come down here?!” mum called from downstairs.

“Yea” he replied. I got up and scampered across the hall as fast as I could when I heard him get up. I hid in the closet, which was just across from mum’s room. I looked out and watched him go downstairs.

A sudden urge swept over me. He was writing a song. Oh my God, I must look at this. I waited until I heard his voice say something comforting to mum. Asshole. I pity mum, really. She believes anything he says. I opened the closet door and began to casually walk down the hallway until I banged into Joey.

“Oh, there you are!” he said. Whoa. De ja vu.

“Here I am” I responded.

“I remembered what I wanted to tell you!” he grinned.

“Then tell me.”

“Do you wanna hang out later? I mean... you don’t have to, but I thought you might want to meet my friends or... or something. We’re... sorta friends, right?” he asked.

Sorta friends? What the fuck put that idea in his mind, I have no idea. I raised an eyebrow in confusion. No one asked me to hang out with them. Ever. In school, I was this total loser. I wouldn’t talk to anybody after my dad died and I still don’t. I didn’t see the point in trying to regain something that was only a tad higher than now. No one knew my name in my school until Billie became my step-dad. Although, then, they still didn’t know my name. But I was recognized as “the girl who’s mum is dating that rockstar dude”. Not a very respected title. It felt nice to be asked to hang out with someone after years and years of being alone. But with Joey Armstrong, Billie’s son? I shifted awkwardly. What was I going to say? Walk up and say hi? They only people I’m confident with is mum, Kage, Hollie, Billie and now Joey and Jakob. But that’s coz I spend days with these people. Well, four of them anyway. I get used to their actions and thoughts. I haven’t had a friend since first grade.

“Me?” I asked. “Why?”

“Eh, you’re pretty cool” Joey smiled. “You up for it?”

Before I could fake up a scoff and a laugh of pity and shout no, I said, “Sure...”

“Really? Oh, awesome, then it’s set!” Joey grinned. I didn’t want to smile. I wanted to roll my eyes and scoff loudly at him but I felt the corners of my mouth lift into one. “I’ll tell you when we’re leaving, yea?”

“Um, yea sure, alright” I said. He gave me one last smile before leaving. Fuck. Did I just set a date with Joey Armstrong?

Ha, no. I didn’t like Joey. He’s just like Billie.

He’s juuuust like... Billie...