I Need Him, My Gerard

I love him. I love him, I love him, I love him. I love everything about him, everything that he stood for. I could go on for an eternity about his personality, how hot he was, all the cute little things he did, but I’d bore you. Although how you could read this and not fall in love with the perfect man I’m spending eternity with is beyond me. I feel like I should do more for him though, if you know what I mean? Like I don’t work hard enough to make him smile, or laugh, like I don’t let him know how special he is to me every single second. I guess that would bore him though, and you.

He’s just so angelic, radiant, loveable. Right now, he’s sleeping curled up against my side, snoring softly in a way that could never be considered annoying. His raven black hair hangs in little clumps against his ivory face and neck, and against my chest, which was far darker against his. Mine was richer, a little tanned, although Gerard was the one with the Italian heritage. I brush a few stands from his face so I can get a better view. All the worry of the day and the stress in his life disappears when he sleeps, and his face becomes so peaceful and radiant. My slight movement woke him though, and he sighed and flickered open his eyes.
“Mornin’ Frankie,” he whispered gently, sleep thick in his voice and making it sound deeper than usual.
“Hey Gee, sorry I woke you up baby,” I murmured, leaning down and kissing his cheek lightly.
“S’ok, I wanted to wake up anyway,” he said, sighing heavily again and rubbing his eyes, before sitting up gently and propping his head against my shoulder.
“How did you sleep love?” I asked and he giggled.
“Pretty good actually, waking up with you for the first time in ages was really something,” he said and I nodded.
“Even if its cramped,” I stated and he chuckled and kissed my shoulder.
“Yeah, even if its cramped.” I forgot to mention, although you probably worked it out, we’re both squashed up in my hospital bed at the moment, because we just needed to be close to each other. He’d been sleeping beside me for weeks, but never in my bed, and this was the first and last time he would. Oh, that sounds like I’m breaking up with him, which I’m not, I NEVER would. Just that, I’m getting out today. The nurse was a little angry when she had to tell me I could leave, but obviously not for me. She wouldn’t get to see Gerard anymore if I was out, would she? There’s no way he’d tolerate her near him if it wasn’t for me, so contacting him out of the hospital would be out of the question. Ha. Serves her right for trying to take what she absolutely cannot have. Ever.
“I cannot wait to get out of here Gee,” I groaned and he grinned.
“Me either! Although, obviously, it’s worse for you love,” he said and I laughed.
“Yeah, I hate tests, I hate the annoyingness of the people here, and the being stuck in one place, and the not being able to smoke!” I complained and he smiled and kissed my lips softly.
“Its ok Frankie, you’ll be out in a few hours, I promise, and then we can go home,” Gerard said and that reminded me of something I’d been thinking about for a few days now.
“Yeah, well I need to go shopping first,” I said and he frowned.
“Ok, I’ll go with you,” he said and I frowned now.
“You can’t darling, its something I need to get for a surprise for someone,” I said and he pouted.
“I won’t tell,” he said, sounding childish and I rolled my eyes.
“Well that may be hard for you Gee, seeing as the surprise is for you!” I laughed and he grinned, his eyes sparkling like a little kid on Christmas.
“Ooh Frankie tell me, what is it? What’s it for?”
“I can’t tell you what it is, it’ll ruin the surprise! As for why, just because I love you more than anything, and I always have, right from that day I met you,” I said and he smiled, softer and less like a kid on Christmas now. He leaned in and kissed me, softly at first but I could feel the smouldering passion behind it. Soon his tongue glided cautiously along my bottom lip and I sighed, opening my mouth and allowing his tongue access. He searched the inside of my mouth, grazing his tongue against mine before pulling out and biting on my lip where my ring usually is. Damned doctors made me take it out for a while to prevent infection and they were pretty worried it would interfere with the tubes as well. After a few minutes he pulled away and kissed my cheek.
“I love you Frankie,” he whispered against my skin, his words ghosting on the flesh and making me shiver.
“I love you too Gerard,” I said and he smiled.
“Lets get up and ready, eh love? Then I can go grab that doctor and make him sign the discharge papers,” he suggested and I nodded eagerly. Granted I didn’t want to move from the comfy spot with Gerard on the bed, but I really, really wanted to get out of this gown, out of this hospital and home, with of course the exception of the stop I had to make. I heaved myself out of the bed and put on the rumpled clothes from yesterday. They’d been discarded rather hurriedly after the painting session yesterday, if you know what I mean… and yes, you should be raising your eyebrows in a disapproving way.

“Ok Mr. Iero, are you ready to go home?” The doctor asked and I rolled my eyes.
“Hell yes! Never been more ready for anything Doc!” I said enthusiastically and he smiled politely.
“I suppose you will be happy to leave also Mr. Way?” The doctor asked, turning to Gerard.
“Yeah, I really want to get Frankie home so I can take care of him myself thanks,” Gerard said, beaming at me.

Fresh Air. I can breathe Gerard, and the sunlight feels so good. It makes you shine Gerard, makes you sparkle baby. I love you. Did I say that before? Of course I did. I say it every day, because every day I realise I love you and it hits me again. Although hits is definitely the wrong word. Envelops. That’s a good word. Your love envelops me and makes me real, makes me feel you. I never want it to stop, and hopefully, after tonight, it never will.