Tragedy

The blue sky was slowly being tainted red, orange, and purple and there were not many clouds above. However, the sun could not be seen. For god knows how long, I tried searching for it mindlessly, like I wasn’t going to an emergency, like I was just kid with his father on his way home, returning from a field trip. Neither I nor Jon talked since the moment we climbed up the car. It was ironic really, that I remained quiet and still when deep inside me my insides were doing somersaults for worrying too much. I was in the back seat, and Jon was driving. He never wanted me in the backseat when he drove. He said he felt like someone’s driver—my driver—when I sat at the backseat. But now he didn’t even mind. Maybe he didn’t even notice. Maybe there was so much going on in his head.

I felt like we’ve been on the road for three hours now but the sky told me it must’ve been just a couple of minutes. I looked at my reflection in the mirror. My eyebrows met. If I was a stranger to myself I’d be scared. Maybe this was what Brendon—I sighed, Brendon.

It wasn’t like it was my first time thinking about him. It was just that this was the first time I was going to see him in two years and I’ve no idea what to expect. Maybe I was expecting something but was just too scared to admit what it was.

“You do realize this is a four-hour trip, don’t you?” Jon asked. I realized he must have been looking at my reflection in the front mirror despite the fact that he was driving. His expression was just as serious as mine. He wasn’t asking, he was informing.

“I didn’t ask where we’re going.” I said stiffly, although it was only then that I realized I didn’t even know where we were heading to. All I knew was I was going to see Spencer and Brendon and the rest soon, and know what happened. The distance didn’t matter to me and I didn’t think it mattered to Jon either.

“I know. I was merely informing you.”

I guessed it right. I’d known Jon for too long not to guess his motives correctly. And the same went for Spencer, and Brendon, and it was what was bothering me the whole time—

I knew that if they were okay, if Brendon or Spencer were okay, it could’ve been them who’d called us. Or they could have not called us and not allowed anyone to inform us at all.

But neither was the case.