Spinning Out of Control

I finally gained some courage and force my feet to move forward. I walk up the steps, taking deep breaths as I do so. Emma was looking around, mesmerized, while I stop in front of the door.

I reach out and ring the bell.

A few moments later, the door opens. It was my mom. She hadn’t changed, but there were more laugh lines and a few more gray hairs. She stared at me blankly before the look of recognition flashes over her face. “Hi, Mom,” I murmur, allowing a smile to grace my face. She lets out a small shriek of surprise.

I could see tears swimming in her eyes, but she kept her composure. “Ravyn!” she smiles in gratitude, moving outside and sweeping me into a hug. She stilled smelled like her lavender perfume.

Her eyes move away from me and toward my daughter. Emma squeaks before burying her face in my hair. I laugh, bumping her up higher on my hip.

“Emma,” I whisper lightly, “say hi to Grandma.”

“Oh,” my mother smiles, reaching over to smooth Emma’s shirt down, “she’s precious.” Her fingers shook slightly as she did so, and my daughter finally peeks out of her hiding place to look me her grandmother in the eye.

“How old is she?” Mom asks as she pushes open the door and leads us inside.

I place Emma down, but keep her hand in mine. “Two and three quarters. Her birthday’s in a few weeks.”

“Herald!” My mom suddenly screams up the staircase. “Get down here! Your daughter is home!” She smiles back at me and I try to return the gesture. “And your granddaughter! Fix them some breakfast!”

I laugh softly as Mom takes Emma from me, telling me to go get our luggage. I nod and move out of the house, blowing a breath out.

I make my way back to the car, my heart still racing. I didn’t know if the guys were on tour or not, and if they weren’t, that means Alex is right down the street. We bought that house weeks after we got engaged, and I doubt he sold it and probably still lives there. I had to bite back a laugh when I remembered it was the last place I saw Alex before I left for Chicago.

I pop open the back of my Jetta, removing my suitcases and Emma’s suitcases. There weren’t many, and it took me a small amount of time to collect them and set them on the sidewalk.

And just as I had closed and locked my car, shoving the keys back in my pocket, I hear someone on the street behind me. “Ravyn?”

I freeze, expecting the worst. Can I really handle talking to Alex right now?

But as I turn to meet the eyes of whoever said my name, a breath of relief greets me when I see it’s just Jack. I haven’t seen Jack for four years. He’s grown up well. And it made me wonder just how much Alex grew as well.

“Hey, Jack,” I smile, but it still felt sterile along my lips.

His eyes were wide, as if he were thinking he was hallucinating. He clears his throat and shakes his head. “What…what are you doing here?”

“Uhm,” I bite my bottom lip, looking down at my feet, “I came to, uhm…” I breathe in. I couldn’t tell him I came to have Emma meet her grandparents. No one knows about my daughter except for Mom and Dad. “I came to visit.”

Jack licks over his lips, nodding slowly. “O-okay. I should get going. I – I’m going over to Alex’s place.” I could tell he was shocked I was back, his eyes wide and his back rigid. He takes a clumsy step back, and I wince. “Sure,” I murmur. “I understand.”

I felt a ball in my stomach tighten at the mention of my ex-fiancé’s name. But I let it slide and nod, giving a hesitant wave as he lopes away.

I take a few seconds to collect myself before grabbing mine and Emma’s stuff, moving them back into the house. I set them by the front door, listening as my Mom asked Emma what she wanted to eat. “Pancakes!” my daughter instantly screams in response. I couldn’t help but laugh.

Pancakes have always been her favorite food, and today was no exception.

I snort when I realize something else. Alex’s favorite food is pancakes. Why am I not surprised?

Alex—

“So, we were just driving down Broadway, right?” Rian laughs as he leaned forward, his hands animatedly telling us this story about a cab driver. “And then our driver suddenly stops…”

His voice drops away as I feel her lips press against my neck. A grin meets my lips as I look down at Jasmine, her green eyes sparking up at me. I peck her lips.

“How about you and me go out tonight?” I murmur lightly, my arms tightening around her waist.

She giggles, nodding her head. “Sounds like a plan. Now I can wear my new dress.”

I smile again and bring her into a kiss as Zack and Rian scoff in disgust. I ignore them as I pull away, resting my head on top of Jasmine’s. But our moment was cut off as my front door bangs open. I jump a few inches in the air before uncurling myself from Jasmine and turning to look at who had barged in.

“Where’s Alex?” Jack squeals, his face pale and his eyes searching around frantically. His expression seemed dazed. “Have you guys seen Alex? Where the fuck is Gaskarth?”

I perk an eyebrow, raising an arm in the air. “I’m Alex.”

His face floods with relief. “Do you know about this?”

“Know about what?” I voice as he comes around the couch to meet me face to face. I could feel my brows scrunch together in confusion. “What are you talking about, Jack?”

“Wait…” he freezes, his eyes glazing over, “you don’t know?”

“Don’t know what?” I growl impatiently, getting to my feet.

He gives out a small groan as he plops backwards on my recliner. He shoves his face in his hands, taking small breaths as if his life depended on it. “Jack?” I ask, tapping my foot. “Could you please tell me what the fuck is going on?”

He uncovers his face, giving me a look that told me I wouldn’t like what he was about to say. And then he said the three words I never thought I would hear.

“Ravyn is back.”