Breaking Their Hold

The first two days after they left were the worst. I had to endure time with Tyler, Sam, Evan, Jaimi, and Tori. I hated it. I hated every mindless second I had to spend in their presence. Luckily for me, they were able to take the ski trip they'd been planning all semester.

"I wish you could come," Jaimi said.

It was the night before they were leaving for Virginia. Jaimi, Tori, and I were hanging out at Jaimi's house, watching movies.

"Yeah." I tried to sound bummed. "I do, too."

"What are you going to do while we're gone?" Tori wondered aloud.

"Work, I guess. I need the money."

Tori made a face. "Eew."

I lifted a shoulder. "I know, but it's not like I'll have anything else to do with all of my friends gone." My mind was on Matt, Brian, Jimmy, and Johnny when I said this.

"Awww!" Jaimi jumped on me, hugging me tightly. "We'll miss you."

Tori joined the hug. "Yeah. We'll miss you tons and we'll bring you back stuff."

I giggled. "Thanks, guys. I'm going to miss y'all, too."

The next morning, they left before I was even awake.

I did work a lot, but nothing could keep my thoughts away from California and the new guys. Matt kept his word, calling me twice a day, every day. Brian always talked to me during these times, and sometimes, Johnny and Jimmy did. Once or twice, JB Diz demanded to speak with me. Hearing their voices made me miss them even more.

On Christmas Eve, Matt didn't call until almost midnight. "Hey, tiny." The television was extremely loud on his end of the line. "What are you doing?"

"I just got out of the shower."

Matt was silent for a long moment.

"Matt?"

"Sorry. I was imagining you naked."

"Ha ha." My tone was sarcastic, but I couldn't help smiling. "Why is the t.v. so fucking loud?"

"Because, for some reason, the more my friends drink, the worse their hearing becomes. They're trying to watch How the Grinch Stole Christmas."

"Is that Jordan?" I heard Brian ask.

"Yep," Matt confirmed.

"Gimme!" There was the sound of the phone being wrestled away from Matt, then Brian's voice came on the line, "Hey, gorgeous."

My smile widened. "Hey."

"Bored?"

"A little."

"Why aren't you with your pals?"

"They're in Virginia, skiing. They'll be back on the thirtieth, in time to throw their annual New Year's bash."

"Hey, Bri!" Zacky yelled over the blaring television. "Tell Jordan if she was a good girl this year, she can suck my dick!"

Without even waiting for me to retort, Brian shot back, "She says not even if you had one, man."

"Merry Christmas, Jordan!" Johnny crowed drunkenly.

Matt's chuckle was close to the phone. "I think it's time for the gnome to go to bed," he commented to Brian.

"I think it's time for all of us to go to bed," came Jimmy's voice, also nearby. "We have to be up early tomorrow."

"Jordan? The adults over here have decided it's time to go to sleep," Brian said.

I laughed. "I guess you'd better do as they say."

"Yeah. I surely don't wanna get grounded."

"You're such a fuckin' retard, Bri," Matt muttered.

"We'll call you tomorrow," Brian said to me. "Sweet dreams."

"Night, Bri," I murmured, and hung up. I put on some warm pajamas and crawled into bed. My sleep was haunted by dreams of Brian.

*****

Brian called at eleven o'clock the next night. I was curled up in bed, watching Nightmare Before Christmas.

"Hey," he said.

I immediately sensed that something was wrong. I bit my lip, unsure if I should ask him what was up or not. I decided not to. We'd only just become really good friends, and he probably wouldn't think it was any of my business.

So we talked for a while about nothing, then I started bitching about my family's tradition of getting together at my grandmother's every holiday. Brian interrupted me mid-rant. "Are your parents still together?"

I frowned, thinking that was a weird question for this conversation. "Yeah. They've been married twenty-four years."

He didn't say anything.

"Why?" I inquired. "Aren't yours?"

He was silent for a few seconds before muttering, "Yeah."

"Bri...are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Hey, listen, I've gotta go. I'll talk to you later, okay?"

"Sure. 'Bye."

For the next five days, only Matt and JB called me. When I mentioned Brian and that I was worried about him, they assured me he was fine.

Tyler, Sam, Evan, Jaimi, and Tori returned from their ski trip on December thirtieth, as scheduled. I listened to them recount the highlights of the week without really hearing their words. I was too immersed in my concern for Brian.

I went to the New Year's Eve party at Sam's simply because I had nothing else to do and I didn't want to spend the entire night waiting to hear Matt's or JB's voice.

I was seriously considering going home when my cell rang. I flipped it open without checking the caller ID. "Hello?"

"Hey, gorgeous."

My heart skipped a beat. "Brian?"

"Yeah. Sorry I haven't called since Christmas. I've been…busy." His voice sounded funny.

"So…how are things?" I queried, climbing the stairs to the quiet solitude of the second floor.

"Good," he replied, and now that I was away from all the noise my friends were making, I could hear that he was slurring a little.

"That's good."

Silence fell. I didn't know what to say. He'd been avoiding me for a reason and had to get drunk to talk to me again. What was going on?

"Jordan?"

"What, Bri?"

"I wish you were here. You could be my midnight kiss."

I licked my lips. That sounded like a great idea to me. "You're drunk, Bri. You don't—"

"I do know what I'm saying," he cut in. "I want to kiss you. Right now."

I swallowed so hard that it hurt. "Well, I'd like that."

"I know. Happy New Year, Jordan."

"Happy New Year, Bri."