Diary of a Very Embarrassed Teen
Monday 28th July …4:49 pm
FINALLY HE HAS GONE!!!!!!!
Uncle Derek stayed with us all weekend,
I thought I was going to have a mental breakdown.
Anyway, I have some good news.
I have made a friend.
Her name is Helen and she is 96. She’s our neighbor.
Ha-Ha.
Nah, I'm kidding. I did make a friend though.
She lives opposite me.
I walked past her as she was sitting on her drive.
"Oh, hello. Have you just moved in across the road? "She said looking at my house. I looked at my house too.
There was a big removal van out the front. This girl obviously had a first class brain.
"Yeah." I said,
"I’m Mary." she said,
"Ellie," I said, and then walked off.
I tell you, that was the start off a great friendship.
At the moment I am sitting at the kitchen table, whilst my mum is looking at her folder.
I am eating chicken which looks really unhappy. In fact, it couldn’t look unhappier.
I wonder if it looked this unhappy when it was alive.
Okay, that has put me off.
I am going to become a vegetarian.
"Mum, I am going to become a vegetarian."
"Right."
"Mum did you here what I said?"
"Hmm...."
"Mum, I’m pregnant."
“That’s nice"
"Mum, today I got rabies from an unknown source which suddenly appeared in front of me in a glowing spaceship."
"Right, can you do it more quietly dear."
Oh, that’s nice isn’t it?
I got up from the table and went upstairs.
I think for her birthday I am going to buy here a goldfish. She might pay more attention to it than she does to me.
Monday 28th July
4:56 pm
Or maybe a grasshopper.
Monday 28th July
4:59 pm
No, I know. An ant farm!
Uncle Derek stayed with us all weekend,
I thought I was going to have a mental breakdown.
Anyway, I have some good news.
I have made a friend.
Her name is Helen and she is 96. She’s our neighbor.
Ha-Ha.
Nah, I'm kidding. I did make a friend though.
She lives opposite me.
I walked past her as she was sitting on her drive.
"Oh, hello. Have you just moved in across the road? "She said looking at my house. I looked at my house too.
There was a big removal van out the front. This girl obviously had a first class brain.
"Yeah." I said,
"I’m Mary." she said,
"Ellie," I said, and then walked off.
I tell you, that was the start off a great friendship.
At the moment I am sitting at the kitchen table, whilst my mum is looking at her folder.
I am eating chicken which looks really unhappy. In fact, it couldn’t look unhappier.
I wonder if it looked this unhappy when it was alive.
Okay, that has put me off.
I am going to become a vegetarian.
"Mum, I am going to become a vegetarian."
"Right."
"Mum did you here what I said?"
"Hmm...."
"Mum, I’m pregnant."
“That’s nice"
"Mum, today I got rabies from an unknown source which suddenly appeared in front of me in a glowing spaceship."
"Right, can you do it more quietly dear."
Oh, that’s nice isn’t it?
I got up from the table and went upstairs.
I think for her birthday I am going to buy here a goldfish. She might pay more attention to it than she does to me.
Monday 28th July
4:56 pm
Or maybe a grasshopper.
Monday 28th July
4:59 pm
No, I know. An ant farm!