Let's Set Ourselves Free

Various conversations filled this hole in the wall place, the voices of different people made it seem like it was bigger than what it was. It made me nervous for those who were going to perform on the stage just across the room. This place, small venue, bar whatever one would label it was all ages; there were different types of people in view at all times all having their group to enjoy this evening with.

More information is needed to fully understand what was going on. A few days ago when I finally returned to work with a happy smile on my face that Sourpuss Sandra couldn’t even rub off. I was greeted with a tight hug from Adam and some worries about my lost. But I was fine; I knew I was going to be. I had stumbled upon a flyer about wanting some musicians to play at some local bar, or venue so it stated. I, being the supportive of Brendon’s dream, I mentioned it and he was excited to do it.

So here I stand in another Beatles t-shirt, some black skinny jeans and black Doc Martens. I was constantly getting the stay comment, “Oh nice The Beatles,” or “The Beatles rock, dude.” I once got, “The Beatles are great, what song do you like from them?” But that was from Adam when he arrived. I was really happy that I wasn’t going to be standing alone as I watched my boyfriend perform.

“Is he nervous?” I heard Adam ask, I was too in tuned with the conversation that was happening next to me between two girls. Both laughing and smiling at their memories from old concerts. Making me realize I haven’t seen a band alive before.

“Hmm?” I hummed my response, not entirely sure what I heard.

“Brendon, is he nervous?” Adam laughed lightly, his pearly whites showing.

“Oh,” I smiled and shrugged my shoulders, my head shaking just a bit. “I don’t think so; he looked fine when he left for the stage.”

“Hey, thanks for inviting.” He said softly, the smile widen.

“You’re completely welcome.” I said and nudged his side lightly, earning a chuckle.

It was only in a matter of minutes that the first performer was on stage and starting the show. The way they played sounded much like the 60s era which easily brought me into liking them and becoming a fan. The other two performers came on and did well, finally I noticed that was Brendon was setting up and getting ready.

I brought my arm around my middle and held onto it tightly, for some reason I was nervous for him. I wasn’t scared that he was going to get booed because he was a really great singer, I just could feel the nervous butterflies fill my stomach as he moved and would check the crowd out. I wouldn’t think it was any different from the coffee shop he sang at, but then I wasn’t the one on the stage alone.

Once he was settled, guitar on his lap holding close to his body as his free held the pick and adjusted the microphone in front of him, he looked nervous. I watched closely as he closed his eyes for a moment and then began to play and sing. It brought a smile to my face to hear his voice echo through the crowded room, the way he moved his head to one side as he sang a verse of the song and his smile whenever someone cheered.

He must’ve felt amazing up there once the nerves were gone. It was obvious he was happy, he looked really happy. I looked over to Adam who seemed to be enjoying himself; he looked back and smiled. His arm wrapped around my shoulders bringing me close to his side, I wrapped my arm around his waist and we swayed. Brendon was done sooner than I thought, maybe I was enjoying myself too much tell that he was up there for a good amount of time. He got what he deserved at the end of his time, a room full of cheering people.

I couldn’t wait to tell him how well he did, and how amazing it was to see him up there. I stood on my tippy toes looking over the sea of heads to find the head that belonged to my boyfriend. I bit my bottom lip impatiently as I moved my head around a bit; my arms were dying to hug him already. As I spotted him finally, the smile that he left the stage with didn’t seem to decrease. He spotted me quickly and smiled more, that prefect smile he owned.

He took a few steps closer and then was stopped by an older looking man, his eyes switched to me to this older man. He was turned around by the arm that was wrapping around him; he looked over his shoulder to me giving me that confused stare. I shrugged a little knowing I couldn’t tell him anything from where I stood.

“This might be a while,” I heard Adam say and grab my arm slowly pulling away from the spot I stood at.

“Why’s that?” I asked and followed him unwillingly.

“Because that man looks like he’s all business so who knows what he’s saying to Brendon.” Adam explained.

My mouth went into an, ‘O’ shaped now understanding. I followed Adam outside this hole in the wall and off to the side where a few others stood. I could hear the next group starting to play, but it was cut off by the closed door and the band now sounded muffled.

“I’ve got news.” I heard Adam say after a while, easily getting my attention from the busy street. I looked over to him and smiled also raising my eyebrows that he probably couldn’t see under my bangs. I guess by the expression on my face he continued, “I met someone.” He said like it was nothing, like he was stating he found a penny on the sidewalk.

“No way,” I smiled brightly and playfully smacked his arm. “Who is?” I asked.

“You wouldn’t know him,”

“You never know.”

“Johnny O’Neil.” Adam said more excitedly, doing some kind of dance in his spot as he arms moved along the side of him.

“Yeah, I have no clue who that is.” I laughed and joined him in his weird dance. “But I’m happy you found someone.”

“I knew you wouldn’t, but that’s okay because I’m going on another date with him tomorrow night.” He raised his arms above his head.

“Can this be? Is this love?” I asked and smiled more if it was possible. I couldn’t help but get excited for Adam. He found someone; I loved watching people get excited for the dates they were going on and the stories of how they first kissed. I couldn’t help that I was hopeless romantic. “Oh gosh, you are so inviting me to your wedding.”

“Calm down, Juliet. I don’t even know if we’re going down that road yet!” Adam laughed and shook his head. “But don’t think that I haven’t even thought about it, and it scares me. I don’t want to get excited for this if we’re not even going anywhere, oh my god.” He said a bit freaked out, his hands covering his face.

“Don’t worry about it, Adam. You two are going to be great together. Okay?” I reassured him and rubbed his upper arms comfortingly.

“Oh, I do hope so. He makes so happy.” Adam gushed and started to laugh. “Look at me, I can’t stop smiling.”

“That’s good, I love seeing you like this. It’s really cute.” I laughed a bit and crossed my arms.

Adam and I continued to stand outside gushing over the relationship that Adam was hopeful for. I was lost track of time because the conversation that was going on. Adam began to ask me questions about Brendon and myself the basic how we met and how we got to where we were now. It finally accrued to me that Brendon still wasn’t around, I frowned lightly. I walked over to the door and opened it, seeing that Brendon was now at the bar with the same man and a few other people. A few girls as well but there shouldn’t be anything to worry about, right?

I looked up at the head that was right above me the confusion on Adam’s face as well. I shrugged unsurely; I mean I shouldn’t get worked up on something I didn’t know. I moved away from the door and back to the spot we stood at. I looked up at Adam with a questioningly look, hoping he could give me some kind of answer that would comfort the feeling in my stomach.

“Um,” Adam started obviously noticing the worry in my face. “It’s probably business, or something and the girls, maybe they’re just telling him how well he did on his set.” Adam nodded his statement.

“Yeah, maybe…” I said and frowned slightly, “I shouldn’t get worked up honestly, and I know this stuff happens and if he’s getting into this music industry then the girls approaching him, I know I should get use to that.” I nodded, trying to convince myself. I didn’t want to be the girlfriend who didn’t trust their boyfriend but I didn’t want to the blinded one who didn’t see what he was doing.

“It’s getting late and we have work tomorrow so…” Adam interrupted my thoughts of worry. Thankfully.

I opened my mouth to speak and nothing but air escaped, I nodded instead and looked up at him and smiled. “Yeah, you should get home and rest, possibly dream of Johnny tonight.” I teased and poked his chest.

“Let’s hope so.” He smiled. “I don’t want you standing here alone, and I don’t want you being alone in there. Maybe I could drop you off at home?” He offered.

I took a deep breath and looked towards the door and then back to Adam, I hummed lightly debating if I should stay and wait. “Yeah, that would be nice. But can I borrow your phone? I just want to text Brendon to let him know.” I asked lightly.

“Yeah of course,” Adam said and pulled out his phone from his back pocket and handed it over. I stare at it for a moment, with no idea how to send out a text on his phone. I wasn’t that good with cell phones seeing I never had one. I looked up at Adam and laughed nervously. “What’s his number?” He laughed and took back his phone.

With a short few seconds the text was sent. I then followed Adam to where he parked and got into the passenger seat as he opened the door for me, I smiled in my way of thanks and he returned the smile. We continued to speak of this Johnny fellow; I still wasn’t over the romantic part of it. And Adam didn’t hold back on teasing me about my fascination with romances.

We arrived to my apartment building, I leaned over and placed a kiss on Adam’s cheek and said my goodbye. I got out of the car and pulled out my keys from my pocket and opened the door, once I was inside I heard Adam drive off. I ran up the stairs to our apartment and entered, it was quiet and I wasn’t bothered by it.

A flick on the light switch and the light lit up the small apartment and with a few steps I accidently pulled down the black sheet that made the living room and bedroom apart. I bite my bottom lip and shook my head; there wasn’t any way of me pulling that back up. I hunched over slightly and brought my foot up; I untied the shoelace to my boot and pulled it off and carelessly tossed down and did the same with the other boot.

I could feel the laziness start to creep up on me so I changed before I got fully lazy. I tossed myself on our unmade bed and stretched out fully taking up all the space I could. I looked over to the window that was slightly open allowing the cold breeze to enter and give me small chills. I smiled at the goose bumps crawling over my arms. I rolled onto my side and slid my hand under the pillow my head laid on, my thoughts at ease.

I closed my eyes and relaxed even more. The next moment I decided to open my eyes I jumped and screamed lightly at the beautiful brown eyes that were staring at me. “Oh crap,” I breathed and placed a hand on my chest feeling it raised up and down rapidly.

Brendon grinned as he stayed propped up on his elbow, still fully clothed in the outfit he wore for the night’s event. “You dropped the sheet again.” He laughed.

I looked over my shoulder seeing that it was now hanging, I looked back at him and nodded slightly. “It doesn’t mean you have to scare me.” I shook my head and sat up carefully, no longer feeling tired or lazy.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you, you just looked really peaceful and I kind of got lost in what I was looking at.” Brendon said and sat up next to me; he brought himself closer and wrapped his arm around my waist. I instantly cuddled into his chest and rested my forehead in the crook of his neck.

“It’s okay,” I smiled and placed my hand on his leg, closed my eyes.

“And I’m sorry for what happened at the venue, I didn’t think that was going to happen and I’m glad that Adam was with you.” He continued and rubbed my back softly.

“Its fine, I’m not even mad.” I mumbled lightly as I started to become sleepy again.

“Well,” He started; I could hear the smile on his lips. “I was talking to that guy, and he thinks I really got something. I told him that I do small gigs at the coffee stop I work at and he told that I wouldn’t be doing that for much longer. All I need to do is made a demo tape and I could be on my way.”

I raised my head and looked up at him, “Are you serious?” I asked and turned him. I looked over his face for any kind of sign. I didn’t want him to joke about this.

“I’m totally serious. Juliet this is my big break, something that I’ve been waiting for half my life and it’s finally happening!” He said more excitedly. He placed his hands on my cheeks and pressed a gently kiss on my lips.

“Congratulations!” I smiled brightly against his lips. I placed my hand on his and kissed him lightly, “Now you should call your parents and tell them. They’ll going to be proud of their son.”

Brendon dropped his hands and held onto my hand the one that was placed on his, he gave me that look. The one showing that he wasn’t on board with my idea, he shook his head slightly and frowned.

“Don’t give me that look; your parents should know that you’re going to be something and not some beach hobo!” I said and squeezed his hand.

“I’ll… I’ll call them tomorrow.” He said with a scrunched up face.

“You promise?” I asked and tilted my head slightly to the side.

“I promise,” He mumbled. I looked at him with a raised eyebrow, he looked back and laughed. “I promise, I promise.” He reassured and pressed his forehead against mine.

“They cannot be proud of you; you’re great at what you’re doing.” I nodded slightly and placed my free hand on his cheek.

“I just hope they think so.”

“They will, just watch.” I smiled.

I stayed sitting there in front of Brendon, a kiss being pressed against his lips every now and then. My mind started to run excitedly over the future that Brendon had in store for him. But then it did a quick turn and I was thinking about myself and my future. There was no way that was I jealous of Brendon, I was really glad that he was doing something. I was just nervous that I was going to end up as that beach hobo. I wasn’t planning on working at the record store forever, as cool as it sounded I knew I had to do something more productive with my life.

But the only thing was I didn’t know what.