The Memories of Broken Dreams

I couldn’t take this anymore. She was like a ghost, always close, but never close enough for me to hold. I hugged the little girl I was holding in my arms a little closer as I watched Lily and Matt kissing.

“Daddy? Are you alright?” I looked back at my daughter and tried my best to smile. “I’m fine honey.” She wiggled out of my arms and I sat her down on the grass. She sat down and played silently with her doll, the one I got her for her sixth birthday last month.

I sat down next to her. It was still so unreal to have both of these girls back in my life, it was a miracle actually. I couldn’t believe more than half a year had passed already since they came back.

I tried to keep myself busy, but my eyes kept drifting back to the happy couple that was sitting a few feet away from us. Why? Why had I ever introduced those two.

“Daaaaaaaaaddy!” Ally whined and tugged on my shirt. “Can we go see Amanda?” She pouted. “Of course baby girl.” I picked her up and walked over to Matt and Lily who were lost in their own little world. “Hey Lil. Ally and I are going, she wants to see Mandy.”

Lily tore herself away from Matt for a second and kissed Ally on the cheek. “Of course honey.” She turned to me. “I’ll pick her up later. Bye Lex.” She waved and Lily grabbed my hand and pulled me to the exit of the park back to mine and Amanda’s house.

Amanda, my girlfriend and mother of my second, unborn, child. Ally seemed to really like her, or maybe it was just Mandy’s cookies she loved. I don’t know and I didn’t really care.

I didn’t really care about Amanda, or our baby, I just wanted Lily back, something that wasn’t going to happen, ever. Guess it’s all my fault, like everything else.

We arrived at my house and Ally immediately run off to find Amanda. I followed her to the kitchen to be greeted by my girlfriend, who was about 7 months pregnant. “Hey baby.” She said and flung herself around my neck. “I missed you.” I felt the urge the back away, but stopped myself and faked a smile. “Missed you too.” I mumbled and kissed her softly, or kiss, I guess it was more a small peck.

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Not even an hour later the door flew open, revealing a overjoyed Lily and a grinning Matt. “Guys! Oh my god! I have amazing news!” She cried as she stormed into the living room where the whole band was playing video games. They’d showed up not long after I came back from the park.

The stopped playing and looked up. “Sup Lil?” Jack asked. “We’re engaged!” She squealed and stuck out her hand to reveal a diamond ring adorning her finger. Everyone jumped up to congratulate them, except me.

I just sat in my chair, frozen. I slowly looked up to Lily’s happy smile, Matt’s arm around her waist and our friends swarming around them.

I quickly walked out of the house, desperate for air. It felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest and all I wanted to do was die, just so the pain would stop.