Breathless

“And Johnny knows I’m taking you home tonight, right?” Brian asked me as we pulled out of the school parking lot.

“Yup. But he mentioned something about you having me home before 8 since it’s a school night.” I said, leaning back in the seat and rolling down the window.

“He thinks this is a date doesn’t he?” he asked, a smirk making its way onto his face. That smirk used to annoy me. Now I just think it’s sexy.

“Probably,” I answered honestly. “He didn’t seem too happy.” I added.

“Well did you expect him to be happy? I’m taking the love of his life on a ‘date’.” I scoffed.

“Oh please. I am not the love of his life.” I told him, biting my nails.

“You are, you just don’t want to admit you are.” He said, pulling up to the beach.

“Why are we here? I don’t have my swimsuit. Brian!” I said as he ignored me and got out of the car. He grabbed something out of the trunk before coming over to my door. He opened it and pulled me out of the seat with one arm and threw me over his shoulder. “Brian!” I screamed, pounding on his back as he carried me down the beach.

“Jesus kid, you hit hard.” He said, setting me down in the sand. I crossed my arms over my chest.

“I do not like being picked up.” I said.

“Johnny picks you up all the time.” He said. I blushed.

“That’s different.” I said.

“Because you looooove him,” he said, smiling goofily.

“Shut up! I do not love him.” I said, throwing my hands up in the air.

“Touchy.” He said. I ignored his comment.

“Why are we here?” I asked him again.

“We’re going swimming.” He said and pulled out two towels and a brand new swimsuit for me. I took it from him and saw that it was the right size. “I hope it’s the right size. I just kind of guessed.” he said.

“It is.” I said. “I thought this wasn’t supposed to be a date.” I said to him.

“It’s not, unless you want it to be.” He said winking at me. I rolled my eyes at his comment.

“Where do I change?” I asked him. He pointed to a small hut with a bunch of girls standing around it. I nodded and went over to the hut and changed in one of the rooms. The swimsuit was really nice and I loved it. Brian doesn’t have such bad taste. I grabbed my clothes and left the changing room. Brian was already back at the towels, already changed into his swim trunks.

I walked over to him and threw my clothes in the bag. He looked up and me and his eyes widened.

“Like what you see Mr. Haner?” I asked, sitting on his lap. He just nodded. I smiled and looked around. I didn’t see anyone we would know here so we wouldn’t get caught if I kissed him. So that’s exactly what I did. He pulled away almost instantly.

“What are you doing?” he asked me.

“Kissing you?” I asked.

“Aria…” he said, looking around.

“It’ll probably be the last time you’ll be able to kiss me.” I told him. He looked down at me, frowning.

“You’re right.” He said sadly. I reached up and caressed his cheek in my hand. I smiled lightly up at him. He leaned his forehead against mine, rubbing his nose against mine; making me giggle.

“You’re not having seconds thoughts, are you?” I asked him. He opened his mouth to answer but I cut him off. “Be honest.” I added. He closed his mouth and thought for a minute.

“Maybe just a little.” He said. “I’ve kissed you, Johnny hasn’t. Doesn’t that mean I deserve you more?” he asked.

“Maybe.” I admitted.

“Have you thought about us at all?” he asked. I chewed on my lip; I’ve thought about us a lot but did I want him to know that? “Be honest.”

“Yes.” I told him.

“And?” he asked.

“And what? There can’t ever be an us.” I said sadly, looking down as our fingers tangled together. “I live with Johnny, and you’re my teacher and… it just can’t happen. You know that Brian.” I said, my voice cracking at the end.

“Don’t be sad, please.” He begged, squeezing my hand. I looked up into his eyes. “Everything will all work out.” He said, rubbing circles on my palm with his thumb. He leaned forward and connected our lips. I let my hand curl around to the back of his neck and grab lightly on to his hair. He smiled and pulled away, leaning our foreheads together again.

“We can talk about this later. Let’s go swimming.” He said. He slid me off of his lap and stood up. He held his hand out for me to take and we ran into the ocean. He picked me up and spun around a few times before he dropped me into the water. But I pulled him under with me and connected our lips under the water.

I didn’t have the same feelings I got when Johnny held me, or kissed my cheek or forehead. I always got tingles and butterflies; all the good stuff they tell you about in movies. But when Brian kissed me… I felt whole. Happy. Like a part of me had always been missing, and he filled that space.

I didn’t know what to do, or who to choose. Brian was having second thoughts about giving me up to Johnny. So that meant he wanted to be with me as much as I wanted to be with him.

But there were so many complications when it came to being with Brian. He was my teacher so it was obviously illegal to be with him. I lived with his best friend, who would probably kick me out if me and Brian were together. I didn’t want Johnny to hate me either. And then there’s the fact that I could see myself falling in love with him. Easily.

If I fell in love with him, he could easily hurt me. He could leave me. We could be separated. So many things could happen and I could get hurt, once again. And I didn’t know if I could take it again.

“Stop thinking so hard Aria,” Brian said to me, holding onto my hand above the water. Small waves made our hands move up and down in the water, making me smile.

“Sorry.” I apologized.

“Might as well tell me what you’re thinking about.” he said.

“Us,” I answered simply. I let go of his hand and walked/swam over so I could jump onto his back. I wrapped my arms around his waist and rested my head on his back.

“What about us?” he asked.

“If we ever started dating,” I said softly. I made patterns on his shoulder as he walked back up to the beach. He laid me on my towel before laying down on his. He faced me and joined our hands together between us.

“You know it would be really hard to be together right?” he asked.

“Yeah, I know.” I told him. “Always sneaking around, lying, and being careful.” I said with a sigh. He smiled sadly and kissed my forehead.

“We’ll figure it out soon. I don’t want you to be sad.” He said.

“Fine,” I said. He leaned in and kissed me deeply and I had a feeling I wasn’t going to end up with Johnny.