Fat

I keep making myself sick. That’s why I didn’t write yesterday. School starts in four days; I hyperventilate just thinking about it. I passed out yesterday from it. But it could also have been because I haven’t eaten in nearly three days. Well, I have, but I haven’t kept it down. As soon as I’m allowed to leave the table after a meal I go into the bathroom and get rid of it. I have this horrible taste in my mouth all the time now. Hopefully I’ll get used to it soon.

I have to stop writing now. My head is spinning. I should sleep. Mother will be in here soon anyway, trying to feed me. She won't be able to feed me if I'm sleeping. I wish she wouldn't try to feed me. I don't need to be fed. I already eat too much. If I'm going to lose weight, Mother can't keep bringing me fatty foods to make me "feel better". I'd rather be sick all the time if fatty food is the only way to make me "feel better".