Give Into Me

“Why are you getting so dolled up?” Caroline jumped slightly at her sister's sudden question, causing the lipstick she was applying to smear onto her skin. Caroline groaned as she rubbed the rosy pink tinted lipstick off her freshly made up face.

“I'm not getting dolled up.” Caroline glared at Danielle as she propped herself on the bathroom counter, gentling pushing some of Caroline's askew make up out of the way.

Caroline had decided to attend the party that Johnny was throwing, there was no particular reason behind the get together but she had figured it couldn't hurt to make an appearance. She had told Travis of her decision and he had spent thirty minutes making sure she wasn't going just because she knew Matt would also be in attendance. She had assured Travis that wasn't the case, however now she was stuck trying to think of a compelling lie to tell her sister so Danielle wouldn't wonder where she was all night.

“It certainly looks like you are.” Danielle's feet dangled off the edge of the counter and playfully hit the cabinets as she spoke.

Instead of correcting her sister again, Caroline scoffed and proceeded to finish painting her lips. Once she was finished, she traced a finger lightly around her lips, making sure their were no smudges. Danielle continued to watch her younger sister, even as she slipped the lipstick inside her small purse and put away the rest of her make up inside a drawer.

“Seriously, Care. Who are you dressing up for?” Danielle raised a curious eyebrow as Caroline sighed exasperated at the incessant questioning from her older sibling. She dropped her hands onto the counter loudly as her head turned in Danielle's direction.

“Why do you think I'm dressing up for someone? Do I not look nice normally?” Caroline popped an attitude and placed a firm hand on her hip. Danielle laughed calmly as she eyed her sister.

Caroline was dressed in a silky light blue dress that ended three inches above her knees, the bust was lined with a white and pink toned lace which carried onto the bottom of the skirt. She had her traditional gold plated heart necklace, along with her white flower stud earrings that were trimmed in gold as well. Her highlighted hair was styled in loose, beach style waves and her make up was done subtly but the pink of her lips gave the look a punch of colour. To finish off the look Caroline had a pair of four and a half inch nude satin peep toe heels, that were adorned with a light brown bow on top.

“Of course you look nice normally, but you're wearing a silky dress which is clearly giving off a 'touch me' vibe and that cleavage only adds to it.” Danielle explained motioning to her dressing then glanced down at her feet. “And those shoes... they're basically saying 'fuck me'.”

Caroline furrowed her brows before following Danielle's gaze down to the shoes on her feet. “I think they're cute.” She pouted as Danielle shrugged innocently.

Caroline then left the bathroom and moved to her bedroom, briskly sifting through her closet in search of the desired item that floated around in her mind. Danielle followed, leaning against the door frame as Caroline frantically searched through her hangers of clothes.

When she found the sweater she had been looking for, Caroline slipped it before studying her appearance in the mirror. The sweater covered more skin, which made it less 'touch me' as Danielle had eloquently explained.

“You look gorgeous though.” Danielle told her with a smile, Caroline mumbled a quiet thank you before her cell phone's ring tone for text messages loudly filled the room for a moment. She took the phone in her hand and check who the message was from; Travis.

Outside, ready when you are.

“Travis is outside. I'm gonna get going.” Caroline informed Danielle as she quickly took a glance in the mirror, making sure nothing was out of place.

“Travis huh? You two have been hanging out a lot lately.” Danielle crossed her arms over her chest, making eye contact with Caroline through the mirror. Caroline's snapped up, a confused look filled her brown eyes. She glanced over her shoulder at her sister.

“Travis and I are friends, Dani. He has a girlfriend.” Caroline said pointedly, brushing past Danielle and continued on down the hallway. She heard Danielle follow her to the kitchen.

“Well, have fun I guess.” Danielle said sadly, a pout evident on her lips. “I was hoping for a girls night before I spend all day tomorrow job hunting.” Caroline sent her sister a sympathetic look.

“Sorry, how about tomorrow night?” Caroline offered to which Danielle nodded silently. Caroline snatched her keys off the table before quickly blowing a kiss to her sister and exiting the apartment.

- - - - - - -

Travis and Caroline stood in the corner of Johnny's living room, Caroline's eyes admired the attractive furniture and high vaulted ceilings. She looked away upon hearing Travis inaudibly mumble something and took a large sip of his drink. Caroline sent a confused look at him to which he chose to speak at an octave that could be heard.

“Do you want me to leave you alone?” He asked with a slight edge to his voice, catching her off guard. Travis seemed to noticed her absentminded nature as he nodded his head to his left. When Caroline's gaze shifted in the direction he had implied to look, she spotted through the array of guests, Matt walking towards them with two drinks in hand.

Before Caroline had a chance to answer, Matt was standing in front of her and Travis, a slight half smile on his face while looking her up and down. Caroline instantly wondered if Danielle had been right about her outfit and was sending Matt the wrong messages with her choice of attire.

“So you decided to come huh?” Matt asked rhetorically, causing Travis to roll his eyes at the larger man.

Caroline silently nodded at Matt before he looked over his shoulder as someone said something to him in passing. While Matt was distracted, Caroline took the opportunity to send Travis a heated glare and swat his arm gently.

“Be nice.” Caroline hissed, keeping her voice low. Matt turned back to them, clueless as to what had just transpired.

“I'm gonna go call Jenna.” Travis said as he pulled his phone out of his pocket before slinking away into the crowd of guests. Matt and Caroline stood off to the side of the growing party. Caroline eyed the two drinks in Matt's hand, before looking up at him. His lips curved into a dimpled smile as their eyes met.

“Drink?” He asked, extending one out to her. She mumbled a soft thank you before taking the clear glass filled with red liquid. She brought the cup to her lips, letting the cold, tart tasting beverage slide down her throat.

Caroline's eyebrows raised in surprised. “Is this cranberry and vodka?” Matt chuckled lightly before nodding his head and took a sip of his own identical drink,

“Since you don't like beer anymore, I figured I'd get your second favourite drink.” Caroline was slightly taken aback at how he remembered her favourite drink even after three years of no contact whatsoever. She felt herself grin faintly at the feeling that knowledge gave her.

“So,” He said, leaning against the wall next to her. “other than trying to get laid how's Danielle doing?” He forced a genuine smile on his face, as Caroline chuckled and stared down into her drink.

“She's okay.” Caroline looked back up at him, a slight frown on her lips. “She got laid off almost two months ago. She lost her apartment in Huntington, and hasn't had much luck finding a job as of late.” Caroline explained.

She fought the urge to reveal the fact that she felt like Danielle wasn't actually job hunting as much as she claimed to be. To Caroline, it seemed highly unlikely that in a large city such as Los Angeles, there wasn't even the simplest of jobs available for her sister to temporarily take. She didn't think it was that farfetched for Danielle to find something part-time while also searching for a better opportunity.

The subject was quickly changed though and the two began talking mostly about the new songs him and the band were recording. Caroline was curious as to what their new material sounded like knowing that they were one man short.

“You know, you can always stop by while we're at the studio.” Matt said, downing the last of his cranberry and vodka. Caroline had since finished hers, but the cup remained firmly in her hand. “I get tired of seeing those fuckers all the time. It'd be nice to see a gorgeous face every now and then.”

“I'll keep that in mind.” Caroline said meekly, shifting on her feet.

She felt a faint blush spread across her cheeks as Matt's eyes stayed locked with hers until she bowed her head to smile secretly. Matt chuckled at her inability to be able to take a compliment without blushing, it was a trait she possessed since the night they first met.

“You want another drink?” He changed the subject upon noticing her empty cup. Caroline smiled politely and nodded as he reached out to take the cup from her hands.

His fingers lightly grazed hers, and Caroline could've sworn she felt a jolt of electricity pass through her at the skin to skin contact. Her eyes subtly moved up to look at him, his poker face making another appearance. She frowned to herself as he turned on his heel and headed towards where she assumed the makeshift bar was set up in the kitchen.

Caroline stood idly by herself, her eyes scanning the room. She saw Travis and Johnny by the large fifty-two inch television, beers in hand, fighting over some old VHS tapes. Travis attempted to wrestle back the tape Johnny had clutched firmly in his grip, however Johnny was stronger than she thought and was able to fight Travis off.

Travis fell to the couch close by, as Johnny announced that he had found some old home made videos from tour while cleaning out his garage earlier in the day. He had discovered one where Travis broke his tailbone by trying to jump down a concrete flight of stairs but landed on his ass instead. Johnny slipped the tape into the VHS player, something Caroline had no idea they still made, before yelling that everyone was in for a treat.

Caroline smirked to herself, she remembered being called by Matt telling her that Travis was in the hospital but had explained that he was fine and it was only a drunken injury. Caroline watched the screen anxiously, however the screen remained black with only audio being played.

“How the fuck do you turn this thing on?” Caroline's breath hitched in her throat at the voice that filled the room. All the other voices that talked amongst themselves immediately hushed. ”'Elle, help me out here. The screen is all black!”

“Jimmy, it is on. You didn't take the lens cap off, dumbass.” Danielle's voice also sounded through the room just before the black screen was now a shot of a nineteen year old Caroline, smiling nervously.

Out of the corner of her eye, Caroline saw Matt's tall, muscular frame step back into the room. He stopped as soon as he entered the room upon seeing everyone intently stare at the televsion, he followed suit. His eyes instantaneously darkened at the sound of his late friends voice.

“There we go!” Jimmy yelled enthusiastically as the camera briefly moved erratically.

Caroline shook her head in amazement, the video was of the day she had planned to perform for the first time at a local talent show. Jimmy, Danielle and the rest of the guys had shown up in support of her, however by the end of the day they were all consoling her as she hadn't been able to muster up enough courage to actually sing.

The camera sporadically moved from Caroline to Jimmy, as he held the camera in front of his own face. He was a mere twenty-two years old, his face was bare of any of the make up he wore on stage but his jet black hair stood out against his light skin. Caroline glanced around the room, noticing that all eyes in the room were glued to the television.

“This is Jimmy Sullivan, reporting live at Huntington Beach Pier, preparing for the first ever performance of Caroline Ford. Let's see if she's up for a quick interview.” He smiled widely before quickly moving the camera back to Caroline.

“Caroline, what are you planning to sing today? And how are you feeling?” A nineteen year old Caroline pursed her lips as she thought it over.

“Um, I'm good, a little nervous.” She laughed awkwardly, letting her nervousness show. “I was thinking Long Time Gone by The Dixie Chicks. What do you think Mr. Sullivan?” A young Caroline asked the young man holding the camera.

“That's a good song, but I was thinking that Faith Hill one, from that war slash love story movie you and Danielle made me watch.” Jimmy scratched his head waiting for his mind to come up with the name.

“There You'll Be?”

“Yeah! That's the one, you sound great singing that.” Jimmy assured enthusiastically, while Caroline's brows furrowed. “Sing it for me?”

Caroline recalled the adorable smile he flashed her while he said that, making it impossible for her to deny his request.

“I don't know... that's kind of a depressing song. You think the judges will like it?”

Caroline smiled at the memory, the irony of the fact that he had asked her to sing a song about missing someone she loved had been lost on her until she had been informed of his passing. Now whenever she heard the song, or sang it herself, she always associated it with Jimmy.

“Trust me they'll love it.” Jimmy said convincingly before the camera shook uneasily. A few seconds later it steadied on himself and Caroline. He had an arm wrapped around her shoulders. “'Elle, get in here!” He yelled before Danielle weaved herself into the shot on the other side of Caroline.

“What exactly are we doing?” Danielle asked glancing at her boyfriend. There was a hint of a laugh in her voice.

“We're making history,” Jimmy said seriously, staring at the two girls to his left before looking into the camera. “I'm getting the first interview with Caroline Ford, before she becomes all rich and famous and forgets about me.”

“Jimmy! I could never forget about you.” Caroline scolded, clinging to him. “I'll sing There You'll Be, just for you, okay?” She pulled away to look up at her much taller friend. He responded with a bright Jimmy like smile before he pulled her close for a hug.

“I'm going to hold you to that.” Jimmy muttered before his blue eyes travelled to meet the green ones of his girlfriend. “That goes for you too.” His tone was serious, unlike his usual upbeat one.

Danielle's pink lips curved upwards as she raised on her tip toes to kiss his lips softly. “You know I love you too much to forget you.”

“That's good cause I love you too.” Jimmy smirked before the camera shut off, leaving a sight of black and white snow on the screen.

Caroline closed her eyes, feeling a sense of heartbreak wash over her. She had always enviously watched Danielle and Jimmy together, wanting the kind of love that they had. They had been unlike any couple she had seen together, they were so in love that Caroline had naturally assumed he'd be the guy Danielle would settle down and start a family with.

As talk slowly began to fill the room again, Caroline caught sight of Matt down one of the drinks on his hand. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and his chest moved up and down at a rapid pace. His features were darkened and he avoided eye contact with everyone around him. He began moving towards the patio door, darting through some of the guests in the process.

Caroline sighed, mentally deciding to wait a few minutes to see if he just needed some air but when he didn't return she became worried. She wandered onto the deck only to find him with his back hunched over and his tattooed forearms resting against the railing. His eyes seemed to be captivated by drink in his hand that was less than a quarter full.

She made sure to approach him quietly, and resumed a similar position right next to him. Her arm was only millimetres from his. “Are you okay?” She questioned softly, he didn't even bother to look up to acknowledge her.

“It still isn't any easier.” He uttered in a disheartened tone, Caroline felt her heart break slightly at how much the video had effected Matt. His hazel eyes bore down into the cup of alcohol and cranberry juice with so much intensity, it seemed to Caroline as if Matt blamed the drink itself for taking away his best friend.

“It might never be but you can at least go on knowing he left a great legacy behind. He meant so much to so many people.” She offered with a slight shrug and a small half smile as his eyes shifted to her. He nodded before turning his eyes to the beach below. “At least you got to see him before he passed. I never got that opportunity.”

If the old video of Jimmy hadn't of sent Matt's thoughts and emotions into the abysmal darkness of depression, hearing Caroline tell him she wasn't able to see Jimmy before he passed would've done the trick. It had been in large part, his fault that she wasn't around to say goodbye to the late drummer, and seeing the hurt expression on her face only submerged his disheartened thoughts further.

“You wanna take a walk on the beach?” Caroline asked, a tiny smile slipping its way onto her pink lips. Matt tore his eyes away from her to quickly look down at the beach then flashed her a smile, nodding his head gently.

Caroline lead the way down the steep set of stairs leading down to where the sand met the water. Upon reaching the bottom of the stairs, her heels instantaneously sunk into the soft sand. Matt stopped next to her as she struggled to stand on one foot while removing her shoe. She was about to fall when her free hand reached out for his broad shoulder in an attempt to steady herself. Matt stepped closer making it easier for her to successfully remove the four inch heels from her small feet.

She released his shoulder when the sand comfortably moulded against her bare feet and her hands easily carried her recently discarded shoes. They walked in silence for a few minutes before Matt chose break it.

“How did you find out about Jimmy?” Matt asked suddenly, as Caroline sighed, recalling the dreary morning of December twenty-eighth.

“Danielle,” Caroline told him with a slight nod, her paced slowed down until she had stopped walking all together. Her fingers released her shoes and they fell softly to the sand. “Riley and I had had a show in this small town in Arkansas that night and I got the call as we were on the road. Truthfully, I didn't believe her at first.”

Matt nodded, understanding what she meant. He had felt the same when Leana had called him that fateful morning and somewhere between sobs and sniffles she told him Jimmy had died while she slept next to him.

“Riley offered to cancel the show but I knew Jimmy wouldn't want me to.” Caroline smiled as she pictured the lanky drummer scolding her if she ever doubted herself or made excuses for not performing. “I sang There You'll Be that night for him, I was a bawling mess by the end but it was his favourite song that I played. Kind of ironic now.” Caroline laughed awkwardly as Matt's lips curved upwards slightly.

“You should hear the last song he wrote and recorded, it's fucking creepy how foretelling it is.” Matt sighed, his eyes briefly darting up at the sky. It was something he found himself doing quite a lot of since Jimmy's sudden departure.

“I'd love to hear it,” Matt's eyes drifted back down to the brunette in front of him, a genuine smile on her face. At that moment the wind decided to pick up, Matt felt the cool breeze whip against his exposed arms.

Caroline tightened the sweater around her upper body as her hair and the skirt of her dress blew wildly with the sporadic gusts of salty air. Instinctively he reached out to brush some hair behind her ear so it wouldn't get in her eyes, but instead of pulling away once he had done that, his hand lingered. His fingers lightly grazed the side of her soft cheek as he watched her eyes flutter at his touch.

“I missed you so fucking much.” He breathed impulsively as her brown eyes opened and met his. A hint of a smile made its way across her lips. Matt returned the faint smile before taking a small step forward and brushed his lips passionately against hers.

Caroline was surprised his sudden action especially after earlier in the night where he showed no hint of how he was feeling when they made skin to skin contact. However, as Matt's thumb grazed over her cheek bone and expertly moved his mouth with hers, she knew he had been trying not to show his true feelings. That plan had now been shot to hell the moment he leaned in and skillfully captured her lips.

Caroline pressed herself as close to Matt as she could, her hands travelling up his built chest, feeling the soft material of his shirt underneath her finger tips.

A muffled moaned escaped from her as she felt his tongue slip passed her lips. His hand that wasn't on her cheek was resting firmly on the small of her back, keeping her in place. Though she had tried her best at hiding it, Caroline knew she wouldn't want to be anywhere else.