I Brought You Bullets, You Brought Me Love

Soon after I started hugging Frank, he calmed down, and the people eventually went away, except for Mikey, Ray, Bob and Alicia; in fact, they came to see if he was fine, or whatever, which surprised.
I could just tell Frank wasn’t okay, even if he had stopped crying; he was hugging me so tightly and strongly I almost wasn’t able to breath, or even move. I could feel him biting his lip, in my arms, and I could feel him tense up as my friends got closer to us.
- Hey, is he okay? – Ray asked, a little nervous and stiff, but with a worried line crossing his features.
I shook my head, tears still falling, and then I kissed the top of Frank’s head.
- Baby, wanna skip this class? I think it’ll be better, we both need to calm down… - I suggested, and Frank lifted his head to look at me, nodding; I kissed his forehead, and we let go of each other, only our hands kept linked.
- Guys, you better go to class, though, I don’t want you… - I started, but soon got interrupted by my sweet little brother.
- No way, Gee; you know I worry about him too, I won’t go back to class with him like this – he said, crossing his arms on his chest; I looked over at Frank, and he was looking at the ground, guilt evident on his face.
- Fine, Mikey; anyone else is gonna join us? – I asked the rest of the people that surrounded us, and the three of them raised their hands, surprising me even more than before.
- We’ll not go until you two aren’t perfectly fine, ‘kay? – Alicia said, and then started walking towards the door at the end of the hallway we were in that led us to the parking lot. – So, you’re coming or what? – She asked, turning on her heels to face the rest of us that were still in the same spot.
We instantly started walking, and I squeezed Frank’s hand, making him look at me; when he did, I gave him an assuring smile, and then leaned closer to him to whisper on his ear.
- Don’t worry, baby; they’ll accept you – I told him, and he turned his head to kiss me on the lips for one second; then, he looked straight in my eyes.
- I hope they do, honey… But I still have to do one thing, first – he told me and, as soon as we were on the parking lot, he spoke again, this time louder. – Guys… - he started and when he was sure everyone was looking at him, he bit his lip and spoke again. – I’m sorry for what I made you go through… I know sorry is not even enough to make up for what I’ve done, but… I’m really sorry.
Everyone was silent, and Frank took that has a sign to go on.
- Mikey… fuck, I can’t even start. I made you watch shit you shouldn’t have watched – he started, and looked at me for a second, then looked away at Mikey, - and then I messed up with your mind, at home, ‘cause I was just your fucking best friend… I know you must be really doubtful of who I really am, and if that’s gonna happen again, but I can only promise you that the Frank you met after school is the Frank I’ve always hidden inside of me, the Frank I tried to protect from the school jocks… I’m sorry, man.
Before my brother could reply, Frank looked over at Bob.
- Bob… oh, gosh. I’m so sorry… I mean, fuck, I should’ve never made you do that… you were… just, I don’t know, my escape, kinda. It was as if you loved me, when you did that, that day. I wasn’t reasoning when I forced you to blow me, I’m sorry – Frank said, and then looked at Ray. – Same goes to you, Toro… I… fuck, I know words can’t fix it, but I’m really sorry.
None of them replied, and Frank looked over at Alicia.
- I’m sorry for all the insults, the bullying… I’m sorry. I wanted to look over myself, and I found the wrong way to do it; it’s not an excuse, but that’s the truth. I’m really sorry – Frank said, and Alicia smiled slightly at him, nodding.
Thinking Frank had already finished, I started walking again, but was quickly taken aback by Frank, who pushed me back to my place, making me face him.
- Last but not least, I’m sorry, Gerard. What I did to you was disgustful, unforgivable, stupid, erratic, fucking wrong… I can’t even name all the things that that was. I’m a monster, a fucking criminal if we see it really, and still you seemed to be here with me, forgetting all of that. I can’t honestly say how thankful I am that you’re here with me, but I’m also so sorry for what happened… I love you, but that… you shouldn’t even have forgotten me; I’m glad you did, though. I don’t know what would happen if you didn’t – Frank told me, and I was awed by all his words, all the emotions he put just in that little speech; although I was a little hurt that he had said he was a monster, I leaned in and kissed him. I kissed him like never before, only stopping when we both couldn’t breathe.
- Frank… I love you too. And I forgave you, so, that wasn’t unforgivable. Yeah, it was horrible and a fucking terror, but, right now, that’s behind our backs, okay? Let’s move on and forget all about that incident. I love you, and that’s all that matters – I told him, making him form a tiny small on his beautiful face, that I was holding with both of my hands, while stroking my thumbs up and down his cheeks.
Everyone was silent, and I felt someone get closer to us, the footsteps being heard loudly as the person got closer and closer; I didn’t care, though, I was just looking at my little piece of heaven, nothing could possibly interrupt this.
- Gerard Arthur Way – the person said, and I tensed up; I knew that voice all too well to ignore it. Holy shit.
- Emma June Farrell – I said, letting go of my paradise on earth and turning completely to her.
- So, we meet again – she said, looking straight in my eyes.
- We meet again, indeed – I replied, then laughing as she ran to hug me.
I’m pretty sure everyone thought we hated each other, when they heard our little exchange of hellos, but, in fact, she was my best friend. We knew each other since seventh grade, ‘cause, well, we dated, back in seventh grade; in fact, she was the only girl I had ever been with, like, romantically, and she was the one who helped me discover I was gay. Since then, we had always been best friends.
- E’ma, what the fuck are you doing here? – I asked her, smiling widely as we let go of each other; I held one of Frankie’s hands, but kept staring at my best friend.
- Well, Gee, you know our life wasn’t good back at Vineland; we only had each other to rely on and, well, when you moved… I kinda asked my mom to move as well; you know she gives me anything I want, after what happened, so, yeah, we moved here! – She replied, a smile adorning her features although I could see the hint of pain reflected in her eyes.
- That’s awesome! – I said, but then realized everyone was awkwardly looking at us, and I chuckled. – E’ma, this is my boyfriend, Frank; those are Ray and Bob, boyfriends, and that is Alicia; then, we have my little brother, whom you know already, Mikey – I said, and then she seemed to acknowledge Mikey was there, and went to hug him.
- Holy mother of cows, I missed you! – She said to him, while hugging him; I caught Alicia looking at them, a tiny bit of jealously on her face, and laughed.
- I missed you too, E’ma! – Mikey said, picking her off the ground and spinning her around.
When they were done, E’ma went to the rest of the people, and hugged them; well, except for Alicia, ‘cause that would probably cause her some problems… I think Alicia didn’t take it all too well, though, ‘cause she made a grimace towards E’ma.
- I don’t fucking bite, don’t worry – Alicia said, venom filling her voice as she felt as the outcast, once again; the problem was that she felt as the outcast of the outcasts, this time.
- I know… hum, I just can’t hug you, sorry – E’ma said, biting her lip and feeling awkward at the situation; that only boosted Alicia’s rage over that girl.
- Yeah, well, thanks then. I’m not a fucking sick dying girl, but, yeah, whatever – Alicia said; I instantly looked over at E’ma, suddenly letting go of Frank and going over to hug her. I wasn’t fast enough, though.
- Oh, really, tell me about it! You know why I can’t fucking hug you? ‘Cause it would bring back memories of the last girl I hugged, who was fucking dying in my arms… she fucking killed herself in front of me, because I fucking said no to her, just once! You fucking want me to hug you? I’ll do it, but, for fuck’s sake, if I end up home, alone, with a fucking blade crossed through my throat on my fucking way to hell, you’ll be the one to blame! – E’ma screamed, walking closer to Alicia, who was shocked for a while, but then snapped out of it, and started walking backwards. – Come on! Why are you running away? Didn’t you wanna hug me?
I quickened my pace as I saw E’ma getting closer and closer to Alicia; fuck, I’d have to stop that! I grabbed my best friend’s arm, and pulled her back, making her crash into my chest, instantly hugging me and crying.
- I… I’m sorry – Alicia managed to say, as Mikey stepped closer to her. – I didn’t know… Fuck, I’m really sorry.
I hugged my best friend for dear life, knowing how much of a mess she was inside; memories would be creeping up on her mind, flashing right before her closed eyes. Fuck, memories were creeping before my eyes, although they were memories of Frank with that blade on his throat; I forgot about those, though, ‘cause all that mattered, then, was my best friend.
- It’s okay, Alicia… you didn’t know, it’s normal – Mikey soothed Alicia, embracing her; she wasn’t crying, but I could see in her face she felt really bad about what had happened.
- She’ll forgive you, don’t worry – I said, nodding at the same time.

Fuck, Vineland people were such a mess!
Well, I’m saying this taking me, E’ma and Mikey as an example.
Well, let’s start with Mikey; he witnessed my parents being killed in front of him, while his older brother was hiding behind a fucking door, unable to move; then, he had witnessed his big brother being… raped for a whole month, unable to do anything to stop it; then, he witnessed his best friend break down in front of his whole school. Oh, and we shall not talk about his childhood… one day, he end up putting a fucking for in a fucking toaster! It was so damn funny to watch…
Then, we have E’ma; we knew each other since we were little kids, although we never talked that much. She was bullied at school, both physically and psychologically, every fucking day; then, she dated a fucking weird guy, ending up both discovering they were gay [yeah, that’s me I’m talking about; and, well, she was bisexual, for the matter] and being best friends; not long after that, she found the girl she loved, and dated her for nearly three years, and they only ended because the girl killed herself in front of E’ma after the last one had said no to an orgy [what? It’s not my fault the girl was horny, don’t even think of me as the perv]; then, she begged her mother to move away from there so she could be near her fucking weird best friend.
Then, we have me. I was always the outcast at my former school, since I was a young boy; I was the ‘emo’, the ‘faggot’, the fucking everything you can think about; I always handled that fucking shit, but then my parents died in front of me and I did nothing to stop that guy from killing them; then, I moved, and ended up being… raped [I feel like this is not the right word to describe it, but I can’t find no other word… damn English and your lack of words!] for a whole month, right in front of my little brother; awkwardly, I fell in love with the guy who did those things to me, and saw him trying to kill himself in front of me, sliding a blade through his throat; we ended up as boyfriends and he broke down, screaming apologizes to me and saying he should be death, in front of the whole school.
Yeah, I don’t know if it is because of where we’re from, but we seem to be so wicked! I don’t know, though; maybe someone else in the world has had the same problems as us… Yeah, probably.

I was still hugging E’ma and I didn’t plan to let her go; I softly petted her red natural hair, knowing for experience that it would calm her down. Ray and Toro were holding hands, having a small conversation, just as Mikey and Alicia; Frank was awkwardly standing a little bit behind me, biting his lip and looking at the ground. I looked at him, and, as soon as he looked at me, I reached my hand out to him, so he would come to me and hold my hand; feeling this lack of contact, E’ma let go of me, whipping her tears away with the back of sleeve; I planted one kiss on her forehead, and she smiled weakly at me.
- So, you’re Gerard’s boy? – She asked Frank, smiling more happily towards him; she knew what he used to do to me, and knew what he had done the day before; yet, she didn’t seem to mind, just like I did. We were pretty much alike, if you wanna know.
- Apparently… - Frank replied, a little shy; I gave him a gentle squeeze on the hand we were holding, but he didn’t look up; in fact, he looked over at the school building. – I shouldn’t be, though; I should be dead – he whispered, probably not wanting me to hear; but I heard, and I was pretty sure E’ma had heard as well.
Damn, she had! E’ma, knowing how much it hurt me when Frankie said those things, did the only thing she knew to wake people up to reality; she slapped him, really hard.
- Don’t you dare say that again, boy! Can’t you understand how much it hurts Gerard hearing you say those things? It brings back fucking memories he doesn’t wanna have, and you keep bringing them! Fuck, Frank, what happened, just happened! Stop being so stubborn about all that, he forgave you already! Forgive yourself as well! – She yelled at him, and, by now, all of my other friends were looking at us; trust E’ma to cause a scene!
- O-okay… I’m sorry – Frank said, biting his lip; he was not only afraid of her, but I could see in his face he had realized something through her words; he hadn’t forgiven himself yet, though, but I could see in his eyes that he would try. I smiled at that, and kissed his cheek.
- It’s okay, baby… - I said; I don’t know why, but I wanted E’ma and Frankie to get to know each other really well… maybe because they were both so important in my life, you see? I wanted them to bond, and just be friends and talk… And I knew just how to do it! – Frank, did you know that E’ma has got a fucking cool tattoo on her back? – I said, and saw E’ma’s eyes lit up, as well as Frankie’s.
- Really? – He asked, smiling towards her; she smiled back, and her arm linked with his free arm.
- Yeah! Do you know Davey Havok’s wings? I have those! – She started, and I knew she was going to start rambling around her fascination towards tattoos and stuff, so I kinda block them out, just happy that they were talking.
At the same time, I walked closer to the rest of the guys, as they started walking towards the school gates; I didn’t know how we’d manage to leave, but we’d do it, eventually. I decided not to worry about it, and just let my mind drift to another concerns. Would this really work? Would they forgive Frankie? Would Frankie and E’ma get along well?
Would life finally work, for me?