Right Girl

I acted like I didn’t care. I acted like I wasn’t worried. But, I cared, a lot. I was so much worried to where he could be or if he is in a good condition right now or you know. I hate it that I still feel this way despite everything.

“Are we at Kennedy’s house?” I asked John as soon as he parked behind the van of band.

I don’t know what Kennedy’s house actually looked like because I haven’t been there but I’m guessing it’s his because I can hear a voice that sounded like a dad that talks the same way as Kennedy.

John answered, “Right guess, sweetheart”, as soon as he opened the door for me.

I’m not actually sure why we’re there because I thought we were looking for Garrett. I thought we were close enough to search and rescue state. But no, it looks like we’re on a stop for John’s craving for beers and alcohols.

“John” I grunted as soon as I got the idea on my head.

“What?!” He replied quickly, raising his shoulders and smiled.

Kennedy appeared on the front door, welcoming us in their very much formal home. With beer bottles scattered on the table with Pat and Jared lying down on the floor while laughing at a show that they find hilarious all the time.

I tugged on John’s plaid polo and asked, “I thought we’re going to look for Garrett?”

Kennedy heard my question to John and answered it, “We’ll just finish 2 bottles and we’re off to go!” He said excitedly.

I sat on the couch and started to wonder why nobody was occupying it and they even enjoyed the cold floor than the soft and cozy couch I was sitting on.

1 hour passed.

2 hours passed.

“Fuck this!” I said to myself and grabbed my bag.

“Where are you going, Sam?” Pat asked since he was the only one who noticed me going to the door because was not drinking.

“To find Garrett”

I smashed the door and started to walk. I started to walk without thinking of where to go, just to where my feet would lead me. I hope it would help me find Garrett.

I went to his favorite bar and looked for the bartender he would always talk to when we’re there before. When I spotted the bartender gathering the liquors he would need, I hurriedly made my way to him and asked, “Have you seen Garrett?”

“Garrett? As in Garrett Nickelsen?”

“Yes, him”

It took a minute for him to answer and to remember my face, “Oh, yeah, he was here earlier, asking for drinks but it’s too early for me to serve so he didn’t get to drink. But he looks very gloomy, miss”

I forced a smile to the very kind bartender, “Thanks. If he comes back, tell him to call Samantha Brooks, please”

“Sure”

“You must be kidding me, Garrett. Where are you?”

I don’t know where to go or where to look. He could possibly roaming around the city or drinking at another bar or he could be flirting with other girls. I just want to find him.

I grabbed my phone while running down the streets because someone was calling, “Yes? I’m looking for someone and you’re not helping” I said frankly to the caller.

“Sorry babe. But why did you took off without us?!” John shouted angrily at me.

“Uh, you were drunk. Yeah, that’s a good reason, John Oh”

“But Sam---” before he could scold me again for ditching them, I dropped his call and continued to look for Garrett ‘cause he might be here, I could be just too blind to see him.

Garrett Nickelsen:

“Well, is she picking up again?”

“No” John raised his eyebrows while dialing Sam’s number again.

“Where were you anyway?” Kennedy asked while handing me a bottle of beer.

“I was just at my room’s balcony, guys!” I replied.

“Sam thought you were gone, okay. Sam’s looking for you. She might be running around the city right now. I never understood why the both of you don’t meet at the same road; there’s always something wrong” John clarified.

“I noticed that too” Pat added and soon began to wonder.

I patted John’s arm and smiled, “I ask that to myself all the time and I can’t figure the answers”

Kennedy stood close to me and sighed, “I always liked the Sam and Garrett I see when we go out. It was always good to the eyes when I see the both of you. This is life, I guess”

“John, keep calling” I ordered and took a sip from my bottled beer.

John threw his phone on the couch and sighed, “She keeps on rejecting my calls!”

I headed my way out of the house even though the guys did their best from stopping me. I made my way to the bar that I went to earlier just to check.

“Did she go here?”

“Yes, she did. She told me to tell you to call her when I see you. Man, she’s worried!”

I grabbed my phone and started to call Sam’s phone but I cannot fucking reach her. I called again but the same thing happened. I called and called but she cannot be reached.

“Sam, where could you be?”

I ran out of the bar and entered bookstores and other stores or places that she could be. But no Samantha Brooks there. No sight of here, no scent of her. She was nowhere close to finding.

“John’s so stupid. How could he say that I’m gone?” I complained.

“I blame myself too” I added.

Samantha Brooks:

It’s been 3 hours already and I got tired from all the running and the searching. I just can’t find him anywhere. I can’t even see his shadow. I’m running out of places to go and people to ask.

I turned my back. I headed home with a gloomy aura. Because I failed to find Garrett when I know I could have if I just looked everywhere carefully. I should have been with him right now as I start to nag about his carelessness for being gone. But no, I can’t find him. Here I am, giving up.

I dropped my bag on the floor as soon as I opened the door of my empty house, “Welcome home, Sam” I said to myself with a depressing tone.

I kicked my bag away and shouted, “Where the fuck is Garrett?!”

I made my way to the kitchen to get a glass of water and brushed the sweats dripping on y face, “Where could he be? I looked everywhere but I can’t find him”

I don’t know why I act like this. I want him out of life, but I want him to be a part of it. I’m trying my best to forget my strong feelings for him; here I am, close to tears because I’m so worried. I don’t get it. I don’t get anything. Am I just forcing myself to hate him when truthfully, I still like him. Why am I making a mess of myself?

Questions. Questions that I cannot answer myself.

I heard a weird sound while I was heading to my room, “Who’s there?”

I slowly made my way back down the living room, shaking and terrified of what the sound was and where is it coming from.

“Hey” I called out.

I felt something grabbed me, “Sam, if I was a thief, you could be stabbed by a knife right now”

I pushed him away and punched his stomach, making him squat from the pain, “Garrett!”

“What?” He laughed.

“Did I scare you?” He asked and pushed my hair aside my face.

“I.. I looked for you” I couldn’t focus my eyes on his face because I felt uneasy.

“I know. I apologize from John’s stupidity” Garrett giggled and smiled sweetly.

I was shaking; he can see that. I was confused; he noticed it. What should I hide now? He knows everything. How can I even hide my feelings anymore?

I don’t know what stopping me from liking him.

“Sam?”

I took all the confidence left in me and looked straightly at his face, “Yes?”

“If I walk out of your door right now, would you stop me? Or would you just let me go that easily?”

His question was off guard. It came so sudden that I don’t know what to say or how to respond. I don’t even have the time to think of the right words to say to him.

Yes, I want to stop you. I’m just afraid of things.

No, if I let you go, I can return to my old life. I’ll try my best to move on, I swear.

I’m torn between two answers. If I get the wrong one, I might regret everything. I might let myself down for letting go of someone I really cared and wanted.

“Garrett, don’t”

“Sam, I want to know”

I shook my head and cupped my own face. I don’t know what else to do. He was waiting for an answer. I have questions of my own that I can’t answer, how can he expect I can answer his?

“Here, I’ll change it. Pick one: Cameron or me?”

My eyes widen from shock, how could he ask me something? I held his hands for the first time again and pressed close to mine, “Cameron’s my friend, Garrett”

Garrett sighed, “Of course he treats you like a friend. Do you know how we see it?”

“Tell me what you see!”

“He likes the hell out of you! He likes you so much it hurts!” He shouted.

“Garrett, don’t be angry” I calmed.

“How can’t I? I’ve always wanted you back but he was being a big wall! I’m losing so much hope in everything now since he came” Garrett explained.

I pulled Garrett to sit down on the couch as he continued, “I’ve always loved you. I’ll always love you”

“Garrett”

“Sam”

“I’m sick of acting strong. I’m weak since you left my life” He continued.

“Can’t I just have you back?