Priceless

I was already awake, but I didn't want to move. I was so damn comfortable in my position that I never wanted to get up and answer to Erin's call.

"Dammit, Bails! You fucking promised me a lot of pancakes, bitch. Get the fuck up!" she exclaimed, hitting my shoulders with a pillow.

"Ow," I said with a short laugh, then burrowed myself deeper onto Stephen's chest. "Leave me alone, I'm comfortable. I wanna get more sleep."

"C'mon, leave Stephen alone!" Now Erin was getting violent. I felt her grab me by the waist, and she started pulling me off the couch. "I'm fucking hungry."

Because I feared that I might fall off and bump my head, I just decided to remove my arms off Stephen's waist, and sit up. He stirred a little, but that was about it. I envied him for still being able to sleep even after Erin's loud complaints.

I tied my hair up in a bun, and let Erin grab my hand and lead me directly into the kitchen while she continued to mutter curse words at me. Jess was already there, preparing the mix.

Erin took a seat on the counter, and grabbed the glass of water beside her. "You two do your job, while I fucking get some rest here, okay," she said before putting the glass onto her lips and drinking the water. Then she set it back on where it was, shut her eyes, and leaned her head against the wall.

Jess and I just laughed as we started doing kitchen work. I was focusing on what I was doing, so when Jess spoke, I was caught off guard.

"He—um—Kennedy talked to me last night," she started in a low voice. Those words caught my attention. I turned to her, letting go of the whisk I was holding. She looked at me and went on, her voice just above a whisper. "I was hanging at the backyard when you guys were asleep. And then after a while he joined me. He...he started talking about how he was thankful of how I've always been there for him, and he...he mentioned that he could never live without me, and then after that, he—um, he kissed me softly on the lips."

My eyes widened a little at that. "He kissed you? And what happened after that?" I asked.

She looked down the mixing bowl she was grasping and sighed. "I pushed him away before he could deepen the kiss," she said. "I said he was just drunk. Then I went back inside and locked myself at the bathroom for a while, and when I came out, he was already passed out beside Pat."

I didn't know what to say. I knew no comfort words whatsoever, so I just decided to reach out and touch Jess' hands. I squeezed them softly and she turned her gaze to me, and that was when I'd noticed that her eyes were somehow red, possibly because of crying. She gave me a sad smile and I gave her a comforting one, before I pulled her into a hug.

"He shouldn't have—he shouldn't have kissed me," she let out in a broken voice. "I've been doing quite well for the past weeks, but then—he just did that, and now I'm just a mess."

"It'll get better, Jess," I said soothingly, though I had no idea if it would. I had never fallen in-love before; I had never felt that emotion, so I really didn’t know what to say.

“I hope.” She slowly pulled away from me, and I could see her eyes starting to get watery, but she forced a short laugh. She then turned back to cooking and I did the same.

Pretty soon, breakfast was ready. Jess announced it loudly and it was Erin who was first to scramble onto her feet and raced herself to the dining area. Soon, everybody followed, but I noticed one boy was missing.

“Where’s Kennedy?” I wondered aloud.

That question was responded by someone flinging his arm over my shoulders and scoffing. “Funny of you to ask that, when you’ve been with another guy all night,” Josh’s teasing voice said. I fought back a blush as I rolled my eyes.

“It’s just that Kenny’s the only one who’s not here, okay,” I said, and removed his arm as I walked towards the table. I took the seat beside Jess, and Josh settled beside me.

“You might wanna say goodbye to Stephen, though,” he said. “He’s meeting with some of his fuck-friends today and you won’t get to cuddle with him because of that, awwwww.”

“Shut the fuck up, Jobe,” Stephen snapped as he leaned against the wall and sleepily fixed his hair. “Go mind your own fucking business.”

Josh laughed a little. “C’mon, cranky. Loosen up and have a pancake or shit,” he said.

“I have to go now,” Stephen said, making his way over to Josh, or probably to me. He stopped behind me and Josh looked from him to me, then grinned lopsidedly. I completely ignored him as I began munching on the delicious pancakes Jess and I made, but then there was a tap on my shoulder. Of course, I knew exactly who did that.

“Proper goodbye?” he said. I looked up at him and saw him smirking.

“I’ll still see you later,” I said.

“You sure you’ll still be around?” he asked.

I nodded. “100% sure.”

He smiled slightly and patted my shoulders twice. “See you later, then.” And then he said goodbye to the others, and made his way out.

I was aware that Josh was staring at me, though I didn’t exactly know why. Before I could speak and ask him, he beat me to it. “Well,” he stated with a shrug, “I was expecting a five-minute cuddle, but I guess that will happen later.”

“Just eat, Josh.” I didn’t know what else to say. He was not helping me at all. I already knew I was somewhat in trouble, thanks to my confusing feelings, and he was most likely adding fuel to the fire and I did not appreciate it. But I wasn’t optioning on telling him to stop, mostly because if I did, it would become suspicious, and I bet he would just tease us more. But whatever. I wasn’t gonna see Stephen until Thanksgiving—I had that much time to get rid of whatever this was I was feeling towards him.

We spent the rest of the day just watching movies, until they all began bathing. Pat was trying to contact Kennedy, who was not answering at all. Pretty soon, his band mates started getting concerned on his whereabouts.

“He could’ve gone to Gabi’s,” Jared suggested.

“Fuck. Didn’t anyone keep an eye on him last night?” John O wondered. I shot a quick glance at Jess, who looked flustered, like she was debating with her mind whether to speak up or not.

“Who was the last one to fall asleep?” asked Brian.

“I think I was the last one,” Jess said, finally speaking up. “I saw him passed out beside Pat. That’s it.”

“I could check if he’s at Gabi’s,” Rachael put in. “I could give her a call, or maybe drive over to her place right now, I think it will be some sort of help.”

“Just give her a call first,” Pat said. But just as Rachael was taking her phone out, the front door opened, and in came a zombie-looking Kennedy. His eyes were bloodshot, he was obviously sleep-deprived, and he just looked awful.

“The fuck, Kennedy,” John O snapped as he faced Kennedy with a serious look on his face. “Where the fuck have you been? Did you go see Ga—”

“No, John, I didn’t,” Kennedy snapped back. “I was just out. I didn’t come to see her, I didn’t call her, I didn’t text her. And I won't. I’m done with her.”

I guess when he said those words, we were all pretty much taken aback. None of us expected that from him; it seemed like it was only yesterday when they’d broken up, and now he was suddenly done with her? I was pretty sure none of us believed that.

“What the—”

Jared was cut off by Kennedy. “I’m gonna take a bath for a while,” he said and then made his way to the bathroom, not letting of us say anything to him again.

“Well, that was fast,” Erin commented as soon as he was out of sight. “How long has it been? Like 2, 3 weeks? Maybe 4? Whatever. It’s still fast.”

“Maybe something happened to him last night.” Josh shrugged. “Some eye-opener or shit.”

“Maybe he’s stoned,” Trey said.

“C’mon guys,” I finally interjected, noticing how Jess was reacting negatively to all of this. “Cut him a break, and if he says he’s done with her, just be happy for him. Maybe it’s the truth.”

“But you just don’t go from being heartbroken like how he was to being...like...I dunno, suddenly done with it or something,” Garrett protested.

“Guys,” John Go spoke for the first time, “just let it go for now. He’s gonna talk about it whenever he wants to. Let’s just respect that.”

The discussion died after that, and after a little while, Kennedy re-entered the living room, looking fresh and new. He decided to make himself a cup of coffee and some of us were still pretty much in awe as we just stared at him. We got over it after a little while, and continued watching, until Stephen finally arrived. I had to mentally curse myself for thinking he looked good in that gray V-neck he was wearing.

It didn’t help that he chose to sit next to me, but the moment I felt his skin against mine, I felt oddly fine. Although he didn’t talk to me, I wasn’t feeling awkward at all.

Soon, it was time to say goodbye. In a few hours, they would be saying hi to their Asian fans while a few of us were left back home, missing them. I stumbled upon my own feet as I made my way towards the boys, ready to say my goodbyes to them. I hugged Brian, John Go, Pat, Jared, and Kennedy tightly. And then I turned to Jess, and she hugged me like she never wanted to let go.

“I’ll miss you a lot,” she said. “And you better not tell anyone else about that...”

I laughed softly. “How sweet of you to say you’ll miss me and then just give out a warning like that, Jess,” I said. “I’ll miss you as well. Call me whenever you want to.”

“Guess I’ll be doing that a lot.”

I was greeted by the warm hug I had recognized as Garrett’s. Maybe it was his scent I had always known, or just generally him and his familiarity, since I had been around him since I was young. I faced him and hugged him back tightly.

“Don’t sneak out too much while we’re gone, okay?” he warned.

“Garre-bear, we don’t sneak out when you guys aren’t around,” I said, which was the truth. Since it was only Erin and I, our hangouts were pretty much just at either houses, or at coffee shops, or places as such.

“That’s good.” He grinned as he pulled back from me, and then pecked me on the cheek. “I’ll miss my sisters.”

“You know we’ll do, too. Love ya.”

“Love you, too. Don’t forget to text, okay?”

I smiled and nodded, before I turned to Josh, who already had his arms wide open. I gave him a big hug, “Learn to behave properly around Asian girls, Montgomery.”

“Hey, hey. I am always...inappropriately proper,” he said, then laughed. “That doesn’t even make sense. I’ll miss ya, Bails.” He gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before he let me go.

“Though I don’t want to admit it, I’ll do, too, Josh,” I said.

Garrett was saying his goodbye to Erin, so I decided to grab a hold of John before Erin could get him solo again. As soon as our eyes met, we both smiled. He walked towards me and gave me a big hug.

“You do know that I will miss you a lot, don’t you?” he asked softly.

“I know, John. And I will miss you a lot as well,” I replied with a sigh.

“Me or Stephen? Because—”

I rolled my eyes, “I said, you, John.”

He laughed softly and kissed me on the cheek. “You and Erin take care of yourselves for me, alright?”

I nodded. “Just promise you’ll come back soon,” I said.

“We will.” He tapped my cheeks softly, before he turned his eyes to whoever was standing behind me, and then he smiled slightly at me and started walking away.

I wasn’t that surprised when I felt his arms around me. I mean, I already had a feeling it was him, since he was the only one left who hadn’t said goodbye to me yet. I mentally sighed as I faced him. He was smiling slightly, and I didn’t know why. Was he happy to leave, or what? Well, he probably was, since he was gonna be with the love of his life—his music and their fans, but me? I wasn’t happy. I was far from happy, because I knew that I would just miss them all so much.

“Find time to reply to my texts or answer my calls, okay?” he said. “Don’t get too busy with your boy toy that you’ll start to forget about me.”

I frowned and felt my stomach flip. It felt wrong—his statement, I mean. It was just...it was probably just me, but I kinda felt that it had a different meaning to it. I tried to shake it off, deciding it was probably just my guilt eating me up—although I wasn’t sure why I felt guilty like I had done something bad towards Alex; it was just there.

“It’s Alex,” I corrected him for about the hundredth time, and he just rolled his eyes.

“Whatever. I better see you as soon as we get back,” he said.

I tilted my head to the side. “Well, I’ll try to come see you guys right away.”

He smirked as he took his hands off my waist, and transferred them both to my face. “I’ll miss you, Bailey,” he said.

Those words caused my heart to start beating fast. “I’ll miss you, too,” I said, my voice just higher than a whisper, but I knew I meant it. I watched as he slowly leaned down and touched his lips to my cheek.

Josh did that. Garrett sorta did, too, and John as well; but none of those made me feel like the way Stephen’s kiss made me feel. It was probably just a friendly gesture, at least on his side, but its effect to me was not friendly at all. It was beyond that.

“See you,” he said before completely releasing me.

“I-I’ll see you soon,” I let out. He tapped me softly on the arm before running to where the others were. Then they all loaded the van and Erin moved beside me.

“I’ll miss them. Especially John,” she said with a sigh.

I couldn’t answer. I didn’t trust my voice at the moment. Moreover, I wasn’t in the mood to talk; because something inside me was slowly dying of confusion and it was probably because of one guy, and some nameless, certain feelings I had that were directed towards him.

~~~