You Can't Tell Me to Heal

I was puzzled as to why Avery didn’t come to her physical therapy sessions this weekend. The paper that the receptionist gave me said Avery came in Friday to Monday, but I haven’t seen Avery here at all during that time. I couldn’t help but worry. Did my tripping her cause more damage than I thought it did? I couldn’t ask Dr. Resnick about her, either. I didn’t want to be obvious or feel pathetic…

Well, at least the receptionist was rooting for me. She’s the one who told me Avery was returning Wednesday. I let it go and focused on relaxing this weekend. I was floating in Kennedy’s pool, beer in hand as I recalled the whole incident with Halvo the other day…

“Let’s practice.”

“No, John,” Jared said, blocking my way to my microphone. “You can’t leave things with Halvo like that. You should call him back and talk to him about it.”

Ah, Jared. Always the voice of reason. The look on Pat and Kennedy’s faces obviously said they agreed with Jared, so I reluctantly gave in. After giving myself a few minutes to calm the fuck down, I grabbed my phone and trotted upstairs for another beer before I went out to the back porch and called Halvo. “Hello?” he answered, and I was surprised he picked up for me at all.

“Hey, Halvo,” I began slowly. “Look… I just wanted to apologize for the things I said earlier…”

“No,” Halvo said quietly, and I knew I had my friend back. “No, man, I’m sorry I snapped. I didn’t mean to bring her up,” Halvo sighed apologetically. He was one of the few people who knew how badly Jenna screwed me over, how badly fucked up I was after her.

“I didn’t mean any of it, bro,” I told him honestly, wanting to move past any mention of Jenna. “I was just messing with you, I swear. I was just joking and stuff.”

“I know, I just don’t like people talking about her like that,” Halvo scoffed after a moment’s pause. This girl was a touchy subject for him. I guess she does mean a lot to him. “So, I guess I’ll see you around?” Halvo said hopefully, and I could hear rustling noises from his end.

Oh, that’s right, he’s going somewhere with his girlfriend for the weekend. “Yeah, for sure. You and your girl drive safe and have fun and…be safe this weekend, alright?” I teased my best friend.

“Oh, thanks, we will,” Halvo laughed, and I knew he got my joke. I could practically hear his eyes rolling in his head. “Later, bro.”

"YOU'RE JUST A CUPCAKE LOVER!" Pat screamed, and then all of a sudden Jared was thrown into the pool. Water splashed up and soaked me. I swore, but thankfully I'd already finished my beer before the chlorinated pool water got all up in it.

Jared was laughing when he surfaced, but I chucked the empty can at my favorite ginger. in no time we were all playing chicken - me and Pat against Jared and Kennedy.

This was no time to dwell on the past.


When Garrett came back, we decided on a dinner date as a group since he was finally going to introduce his girlfriend to us. Kennedy was bringing a girl he was seeing named Megan and Jared was bringing his girlfriend Chloe, so Shannon wouldn’t be the only girl at dinner tonight. That left me and Pat the only single guys, but that was fine with us. Our party was fairly balanced.

Shannon had a soccer tournament this weekend, and my thoughts instantly went to Avery as Shannon talked about how intense and close their games were over our appetizer of fried green beans. We were having dinner at T.G.I.Friday's. Soccer always made me think of Avery these days. I didn't follow Shannon's explanation at all, really. I listened to her voice more than her words. She was a very bubbly, energetic person... perfect for Garrett. From the way Garrett looked at her, he thought so, too.

After a few minutes of making small talk, Garrett got around to making introductions. he went around the table, so I was last. "And that's John," Garrett finished.

"Oh, you're the one that wished me good luck over the phone!" Shannon said brightly, smiling warmly at me when we shook hands.

I smiled back. "I'm sure you didn't need it, right?"

Chloe and Megan took a liking to Shannon pretty quickly, or they wouldn't be interrogating Shannon like they were now. Shannon took it well. I mean, Garrett did have his arm around her all night. I was fine with the guys' girlfriends, with them having girlfriends. I still wasn't fine with the concept of a girlfriend, I guess... thanks to Jenna.

Jenna Halloran destroyed me. I had given all but my virginity to her, but she couldn't return the favor. I'm one of those guys that can't sit on the fence. When it comes to girls, for me, it's all or nothing. My friends were worried that I fell too hard too fast, and they were partially right. Jenna didn't return my feelings for her with the same intensity. She cheated on me with some guy in school while we were on our first headlining tour. Apparently, she'd... gotten tired of me, of my lifestyle, because it meant I couldn't pay as much attention to her as she wanted me to she couldn't be in my life as much as she wanted to. But when she cheated, we were so done. Well, maybe it was wrong of me to hate all of woman-kind for the mistake of one girl, but I still believe in "Bros before hos."

I took it pretty hard. For the longest time, I was terrible with girls. It was a miracle I had Jenna for a girlfriend. She was actually my first girlfriend, my first...love. We were together for a grand total of 18 months. She was the inspiration for our song, "I Must Be Dreaming." I wrote it for her, about her, to her...

"John, it's your turn to order," Pat mumbled, elbowing me and snapping me out of my reverie.

Our waitress smiled flirtatiously at me "So, what'll it be?"

I smiled back and opened up my menu. "Um, let's see..."

I guess I really was dreaming...

Because all dreams come to an end.