I Hate To Be The One To Bear The Bad News

My heart broke in two when I saw her, I barely even recognized her at first. Just the new color of her hair made me question if it was actually her. But it was her.

I didn't know what to do. Whether to walk over to her and tell her I can't speak to her anymore, or run over to her and cry for forgiveness. I haven't told anyone about what happened with Delia and I that night. I don't know how long I will be able to keep it inside anymore. I've contemplated telling the guys, asking for advice, but they'd just shit on Ronnie and tell me I scored and to just roll with it while I can, but I don't know if I can do that. I don't know if I can pretend to want something.

We were getting closer and closer to her and Maggie, I had to make a move before the guys approached her like everything was fine and dandy.

"Hey can we check this place out guys? ' I practically pushed Bryan through the door of some little shop. Craig looked at me with a confused face, knowing something wasn't right.

"Hey isn't that Maggie Craig?" Robert pointed over pointed towards Delia and Maggie, who were standing staring right at us. Craig and Maggie had a thing going on at the show, and they've been texting back and forth ever since.

"Oh yeah I think it is! Hey Maggi-" I shoved Craig through the door, knocking him into Bryan who fell onto a glasses stand which knocked over a worked there. It was like an old game of dominoes.

Well fuck. That sure brought us some attention.

"Max dude what the fuck is going on!" Robert lifted Craig up off the floor, brushing the dust from his black v-neck.

"Uhm dah n-nothing It was an accident. I need a cigarette." I pulled my sun glasses down from my head and pushed the door open.

My eyes went directly towards the spot Maggie and Delia were standing, Delia gave me one more awful look and started walking through all the people, Maggie quickly followed her , shouting for her to stop running.

It was a mistake not talking to her, ignoring her. I can't imagine what she feels like right now, I left her and now I'm not speaking to her? I'm such a fucking asshole. I watched her run away from me, I wanted to go after her so badly, sweep her into my arms, kiss her until my lips hurt but I just couldn't. Its like something was making my feet stick to the ground. I couldn't move.

I ran my hands through my hair, almost pulling it out of my head whe I felt someone put their hand on my shoulder

"Dude, tell me what's going on with you. Please." Craig was standing next to me with understanding eyes. I trust Craig, more then I trust myself sometimes.

I could see a few fans walking over to us in the corner of my eye, I was not in the mood to sign shit. I love my fans, but I just couldn't deal with anyone. I could barely deal with myself for god sake.

"Wanna go get like, a drink and talk about it?"

I stood there thinking about his offer.

"Before these girls attack us with pictures...."

I nodded quickly and we walked fast, trying to make our way into the crowds of people hoping it was camouflage us enough to throw the fans off.

--

"Wow." He was just sitting there sipping his beer and nodding to everything I said. We sat at the bar we escaped into, it was local, the bartender recognized who we were immediately and sat us in the back corner of the bar so people wouldn't parade us with photos and videos.

I took a deep breath after telling Craig every single thing that happened with Delia and I, from the moment Ronnie was arrested, to today.

"So that's what happened. And now I don't know what to do."

"Do you love her?" He leaned his head onto his arm, that was placed on the bar.

I choked on my beer when that question came from his mouth.

"D-do I what? No no no I can't love her" I tried to shake it off, and act like the question meant nothing to me but it showed that it did. I've been asking myself that question from the moment I laid eyes on her face the day I went to apologize.

"Just because you feel like you can't, doesn't mean you don't. So, do you love her, Max." His eyes didn't leave my face, I couldn't get out of this one.

"I think.. I might." I pulled my face down his my hands, groaning into them when I said it out loud. It sounded so wrong.

"Then go fucking tell her man!" He slammed his beer down on the bar, eyes wide at my confused face. The glass hit the bar so hard and fast, it brought people's attention to us. Ugh.

"I can't just tell Delia I'm in love with her. We haven't even dated, or been anything long enough to have me be in love with her. Its impossible." Whispering to Craig, I shook my head, taking another slug of my beer. It was impossible.. this was all so fast. In a matter of what..two months I've fallen in love with someone? I feel like everything has sped past me. It feels like its been one week. I've been so caught up in everything..

"Love is love, there are no shoulds, havents, or impossibles in love Max." He tried ducking his head a little, hoping the people in the bar didn't notice us. Its hard to go out in public when you're a member of a well known band.

I sat there for a while, drinking and thinking about what I should do.

"What about Ronnie. What about what she feels, she's not in love with me. She loves him, and they're meant to be together. I can't mess that up Craig no matter what"

He put both his hands on my cheeks and pushed them together;

"She might love you, she might not, this is between you and her, not Ronnie. You're not Ronnie's boyfriend are you? He's in jail anyways. He can't do shit. You need to tell her"

We stayed in that position way to long.. people were starting to stare.

"You should take your hands off before these hot girls think we're gay" I tried to say it clearly without making weird squishy noises from his tight hold.

He let go fast and acted like nothing happened, whistling and looking at the girls who obviously knew who we were.

"Look dude, its only 3:45 pm, she has to be around here still. I'll text Maggie and see where they are, I could maybe talk her into meeting us somewhere."

My eyes fell from the sockets. I could barely look at her, how could I meet up with her in public not knowing what I wanted to say, not knowing what I thought.

"No no no no nooo Delia will not meet you if she knows I'm going to be there"

He smirked and pulled out his phone,

"Who say's she'll know?"