A Daydream Away

I was mad at Nathan for punching Alex but i understood why he did it. I was with the guy for 2 years and i had to pick Alex’s side when they fought. I had to make things right with him. He deserves something better than me. I picked up my phone and called him. No answer just his voicemail.

“Hey Nathan, listen im so sorry about last night, can we talk? Obviously you don’t want to talk otherwise you would have picked up but please. You’re in a new place and i don’t even know if your safe. Call me.”

I sighed as i hung up. He was such a nice guy who would always be around and i have to fuck things up. I knew i still wanted to be with Alex but i should have let Nathan down gently instead of what happened last night. There was a light knocking at my bedroom door.

“GO AWAY!”

“It’s only me fucker let me in” I could tell it was jack from the way he spoke.

“NO JACK LEAVE ME ALONE.” I heard a loud bang against my door followed by another and another. “What the hell?” I quietly asked myself. I opened the door to see jack rubbing his shoulder with a pout on his face. “What’s wrong Jack?”

“I tried to break down your door but i hurt my shoulder” I laughed. “It’s not funny Lace my shoulder really hurts.” He wined

“You could have just turned the knob jack my door isn’t locked.”

“Oh” was all he could say before laughing himself. “So you and Gaskarth huh?”

“Don’t Jack. Nathan still won’t talk to me and i feel like such a bitch.”

“Well it was a bitchy move Lace! I am glad you and Alex got together so you will stop being so miserable but it was still bitchy.”

“Thanks Jack you’re making me feel so much better!”

“Well you won’t want to know your boy friend is in my house then will you?”

“He stayed there last night?” He nodded. I breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank god he’s ok.”

“Go talk to him stupid butt.”

“Ok i will asshole" He fake gasped and put his hand on his ches acting like he was hurt by my comment. "Thanks Jacky.”

“No problemo Lacey”

I didn’t even bother to get dressed before heading to Jack’s. There he was sitting moping around on the sofa flicking through the TV channels. I didn’t bother to knock as when he saw it was me he wouldn’t answer. I stood in the doorway of the living room staring at him.

“Why are you here?” He seethed

“I needed to talk to you and you weren’t answering my calls.” I sat next to him on the sofa.

“I didn’t answer because i don’t want to talk to you Lacey don’t you get that?”

“I’m sorry” I mumbled.

“That doesn’t change anything. You kissed him! Why?”

“I.......Do you remember that guy i told you about? The one i was in love with?” He nodded “Well that guy is Alex. I shouldn’t have kept us going for so long because i never quite got over him. You are such a thoughtful person Nate and I’m sooo sorry i kissed him. I should have spoke to you first.”

“To right you should have. Lacey I LOVE YOU FOR CHRIST SAKE!” His eyes felt like they were burning a hole in me.

“I know Nathan and i’m sorry. I truly am. I thought bringing you here would be a good thing for us but it wasn’t. We are too different. You belong in New York but i belong here. This is my home.” He walked over to the wall and punched it before beginning to let tears fall down his cheeks. “Don’t cry Nathan. I don’t deserve your tears.”

“Why didn’t we realise this before we moved here huh?”

“I don’t know i guess we both wanted this to work.”

“What does he have that i don’t?”

“My heart.” I was straight to the point and noticed the pain in his eyes my comment made. But he deserved the truth.

“Did you ever love me?” I couldn’t tell him the truth because that would kill him. I went with something in between.

“I did but not as much as i love him. I’m sorry”

“I guess there’s nothing i can do to change your mind?” I shook my head. “Thanks Lacey.”

“For what?”

“Giving me 2 great years of being with you before you took him back. I guess i secretly knew when Ana told me about you two that you would get back together i just hoped you didn’t because then i would have you.” He sighed loudly before sinking to the floor. Now i was tearing up.

“You don’t have to thank me, you gave me two fantastic years too. I’m sorry i hurt you so bad. I’m stupid and you deserve way better than me Nathan.”

“I do huh?” He lightly smiled but i could see the pain in his eyes. “You’re friends are awesome by the way apart from Alex. I don’t like that dude!’ I chuckled. “How’s his face i hit him pretty hard?”

“It’s swollen and kinda blue but he’ll live.”

“Shame maybe i should have punched him harder” I nudged him lightly.

“Are you ok?”

“As good as i can be Lacey”

“I’m sorry”

“I know you’ve said” He said sharply. “ Look i’m pretty tired i think you should go.” He looked to the ground.

“Oh ok. Bye Nathan.” I hugged him and kissed his cheek before turning and going back to my mum’s.

Why is it everytime i get together with Alex, someone else gets hurt. Are we really meant to be together? I sure hope so as i can’t do this many more times.