I'll Keep You A Daydream Away.

Spring came and went. Graduation came and went. Now it’s summer, July, whatever you call it and Meganne and me sit together watching the sun fade away behind the buildings as we reflect on everything that has happened since the start of the year.

Sophia moved out straight after graduation to go to University in California, we still talk, most days in honesty but it’s still not the same without her here and Lily just moved out to live in her own apartment, she’s only a block away therefore we see each other most days.

Currently me and Meganne live together just us two, but it’ll be three in two months, yes two months. Turns out I was already three months pregnant when I found out, which means the baby was most likely conceived either during mine and Alex’s ‘one night stand’ or in the early days of our rebirth relationship.

I haven’t spoken to him since February, He’s tried to contact me I’ll give him that, I just don’t think I’m going to be able to talk to him yet, I’m still trying to get over what happened, but for once, I decided to finally move on, or at least try.

This is why I’ve recently been on a few dates with a certain person of the past: Kyle. He and I bumped ways a while ago and he apologized about his actions and words at our Christmas party and said he was sorry about what happened between me and Alex, and things soon lead to us going out on some dates. I wouldn’t say I’m serious about it or him, but at least it’s a step forward to moving away from the hold Alex had on me.

The one person who I’ve really enjoyed seeing is Jack, who visited the other day while being up in the city to see his siblings and then came over to see me, he was pretty ecstatic about his timing in the city as he got to come to my scan with me which he found amazing, watching a smile form on his face made me feel warm inside, before he left I handed him all the spare copies of the scan pictures that I’d been collecting these past few scans I’d had to give to Alex, I wasn’t going to stop him from seeing his child, I wasn’t like that, I wanted my child to have both parents in their life, at least if Alex wanted to be in it.


Returning to Baltimore without Olivia was one of the hardest things I think I’ve ever had to do, let alone have to return with the knowledge of knowing that I was going to be a father and a engagement ring weighing my pocket down.

Since that day, I fell into a series of depression; all I’d do was drink, sleep and write. I hardly spoke to anyone, I’d ignore my mother’s calls, it took me weeks to finally understand that yes I had fucked up, but I needed to get on with my life, the guys had dragged me to a therapy session and said that if I didn’t stop drinking I’d be coming to more.

I didn’t stop trying though, slowly I pulled myself out of the depression and got better, and every time I passed a particular barrier I would attempt to call her, it was my way of getting better, once I’d reached the last one I’d take a trip to see her, but that was a long way into the future.

Olivia may not have answered my calls but she certainly hasn’t forgot about me. When Jack returned from visiting his siblings, he brought me back pictures of the scans, obviously showing me that he’d visited her, I didn’t blame him, they were always good friends, and I wasn’t going to try and stop him.

The pictures were one of the things pulling me through the rough time, they reminded me that soon a child would be entering the earth that would be partially mine, the thought of it scared the shit out of me, but was breathtaking. The other three things pulling me through were Olivia, The band and the fans.

I knew one day I’d be able to hold Olivia and our baby in my arms as everything fell into place, it was just a matter of time until then.

Until then, I’ve said goodbye to my regrets, because I need to forget and move along to make things better.