Help Me Tame This Animal I Have Become

I made my way back to the music store where my car was parked. I took advantage of the fact that I was alone to take in my surroundings. The houses were all small and looked relatively similar except for change in color and rooving(or is it roofing?). They weren't the kind of identical houses that are all connected. Those are just hideous. There were cute, though. They were homely. There were miniature trees lining the edge of the sidewalks. The leaves on them were mostly green with only some changing color. It was only then that I remembered it was fall, which meant the cold was coming, something I dreaded. And it wasn't until I actually walked into it that I realized I was at my car. Frowning, I pulled my keys out of my jeans and stuck the appropriate one in the key hole, having to jiggle it a few times before the door would unlock. My heart sank to my stomach as I remembered for the third time where my destination was. I had first been reminded when I got his text:
Frankie, I can't wait to see you later and keep you up all night.

Yes, I have a date tonight and I forgot all about it once I met Mikey. And I didn't tell him or Gerard about it either.
So, why did I feel guilty about it?
I sighed as I started my engine, then put the car in drive and drove off. Then I whimpered because I remembered the restaurant was only five minutes away. I reluctantly parked my car and climbed out. It's okay. It's just a date. I've done this plenty of times before. I like this guy. Once I was reassured, I pulled open the door of the restaurant and walked in, scanning it for him.
"Frankie!" he shouted and waved me over to the table he was sitting at.
"Julian, hey," I greeted him, giving him a hug and a swift kiss on the cheek. He was tall, tan, toned, and was sporting a v-neck. His hard was dark brown and was parted on the left side with a few strands hanging loose on his forehead.
"How was your day, Sweetie?" I smiled at the name.
"It was fine," I told him before I recounted my uneventful day-leaving out Gerard and Mikey.
"Sounds like you might need some...exitement," he whispered in my ear, his hand finding his way to my knee.
I shivered, "Definitely." Now that I thought about it, maybe sex would make me feel better.
"Wanna just skip dinner?" I offered.
His eyes widened, "Yes."
"Okay." I grabbed his hand and dragged him out to my car. I unlocked the passenger door-my keys didn't have the cool button to unlock them all itself-and pressed the button on the door to unlock the rest. I quickly shut the passenger door and opened the one to the backseat and shoved Julian in. I climbed on top of him and shut the door behind us. Julian wrapped his arms around my neck and pulled me down to his lips.. We immediately slipped our tongues into each others mouths. We didn't battle for dominance because dominance was always his. His hands were soon under my shirt and found their way up to my nipples, circling them. I gasped inwardly and pressed down harder on him. He took this as an invitation to undress me, and so my jacket and shirt were off. I coould feel his boner poke my inner thigh and I realized that I didn't have one. Julian took off his own shirt and jeans. He reached to unbutton mine and Gerard suddenly flashed into my mind.
I pushed Julian away, "No."
He looked at me incredulously, "What?"
"I'm not doing this," I told him.
"You're fucking kidding me," he said.
I shook my head, "I'm not. Now go." I opened the door for him.
"Okay, fine. Nice seeing you, Frankie."
Good thing about Julian: there's no feelings when it comes to him