But I'm a Guitarist!

After dropping Abby off at home and her kissing me goodbye, I headed home and went up to my room. I sat on my bed, strumming my guitar and looking at my poster of Billie Joe Armstrong. He’s such an amazing guitarist. I wished I could be just like him. After a few hours of strumming and day dreaming I didn't even realize it was nearing supper time.

“Frank!” I heard my mom yell. “It’s time for dinner!”

As I sat down beside my father for dinner he reached for my hand. Although I was confused I didn’t back away because he also took my mother's hand. It looked as though he was about to pray, which was odd because only special occasions were reserved for prayers (Christmas, Easter, ect.)...or so I'd thought.

“Dear God,” he began. “Thank You for blessing us with the meal we are about to eat and thank You for all that You have provided. Please help us to follow Your path and let us obey the roles in life You have set out for us; the ones You intend us to follow. And if we are led astray, please help us get on the right track.” Well, that was new. I hadn’t heard that one. He stole a look at me as though he was talking to me, rather than God. “In Your name we pray, amen.” he finished. “Let us eat.”

I released his hand, which was now sweaty, as if praying made him nervous. I dug my fork into my veggie lasagna that I'd begged my mom to make for me, rather than picking out every last piece of meat. Our conversation was fairly quiet besides the “Good dinner, dear” from my dad and the short reply “Thanks, hun” from my mom, so I just sat and continued my day dreams of being a guitarist in a well-known band.

After finishing dinner, I helped my mom clean up, although she pretty much begged me not to, thinking that I had something better to do. I helped her anyways though. She deserved it. After we finished, I ran up to my room. Figured I put in some guitar chords before I pass out for the night. I sat on my bed cross-legged, my custom Les Paul on my lap. I strummed random chords softly, trying to find a tune that just wouldn’t come to me, until my hands slid vertically down my guitar and a familiar song filled my head.

I set my guitar down, figuring that school would come too soon. I set my alarm clock and let my dreams slowly lift me away.



I didn’t watch the alarm clock turn to 6:00, instead I it woke me properly, like an alarm clock was suppose to do. I got up and got dressed, same routine as usual, except I couldn’t find my pink belt for the life of me. I ignored it and finished getting ready, deciding to look for it later.

“Honey, you should invite Abby over for dinner tonight,” my mom said as I sat down to my bowl of cereal. Invite Abby over? What for?

“Uhh…sure, mom,” I told her. It’s too early to discuss anything besides me going back to bed. “I’ll ask her when I pick her up.”

I said my good byes but my father wouldn’t look at me as I left, let alone give his usual bid of good bye.

I got in the care. turned on my radio, and headed down a familiar road.

“Wanna come over after school?” I asked Abby after she was in the car and had given me a kiss.

“Sure,” she said, without looking at me. All through the drive to school she said nothing to me, just stared out the window. So, when we got to school and moved her face so she was staring right at me, I was surprised.

“You know,” she said with a small smile. “Maybe we could quietly go up to your room after school, you know, when we get to your house.”

I was confused. There wasn’t anything up there that would interest her, just some comic books and my guitar. I don’t even know if she knew I played guitar. “What for? There’s nothing in there.” I told her.

She leaned even closer to me. “Yeah, but you do have a bed in there, don’t you?” She smooshed her lips against mine and tried making out with me. I just let her even though her soft glossed lips felt weird against mine. When she finally pulled away, I started getting out of the car, but she pulled me back in and got out of her seat, sliding her right leg over both of mine so she was straddling me, and once again she attached her lips to mine. I wasn't in the mood to make out--maybe it was just too early in the morning and I was too tired.

Well, this is awkward.

“Maybe we should get going to class,” I told her as she moved her lips to my neck. I think I would’ve enjoyed it, if it didn’t feel so weird. “We don’t want to be late.”

Now that was clearly a lie. I definitely wanted to be late, but her? She never was late a day in her life. She slowly got off of me and looked at the time that flashed on my dashboard. “You’re right.”

“Come on, baby, I’ll walk you to your first class,” I told her so she didn’t feel so rejected by my lack of enthusiasm that she clearly hadn't expected.

“Alright,” she said getting out of my car. I grabbed our bags from the back seat and we walked inside.

If the "proposition" in the car wasn’t weird enough, I got called to the guidance office around mid day. At first, I thought it was because I skipped my first period class, Algebra II… eww. Once I got to the office and told them my name, I kept getting odd looks, as if they were trying to figure me out. I could hear two of the lady secretaries whispering.

“Oh, he definitely is!” one told the other.

“No, he can’t be,” the older lady whispered back, but shut up when she saw me looking and resumed typing away on her computer.

I took a deep breath and flipped my fringe out of my face and stood up as the old secretary told me I could go in. I walked through the door as another kid came out. He gave me a smile so I smiled back.

“Have a seat please, Mr. Iero,” said a voice from inside. He was an older guy, the average height and build. In fact, everything about him screamed average. His room was covered in trophies and awards, mostly from his own high school years. Pictures from years on the football team were in frames on the wall opposite me. I got a little distracted as I read some of the awards.

“Mr. Iero, please." He said it in such a way, I felt it was almost as if I wasn’t welcomed here, as if I was caught out of class when I wasn’t suppose to be. “Sit down so we can start.”

Start what? I was a bit confused, but I sat in one of the two chairs that were facing his desk anyway so that we could "start".

“Umm, why am I here exactly?” I asked. “What did I do?”

It seemed as though he was searching his mind for an answer but he simply said, “I just wanted to talk with you.” It was an almost creepy answer. Isn’t there a horror movie about this? A young boy murdered by an insane guidance counselor?

…Maybe not…

“I just wanted to know if there’s anything you’d like to tell me.” he stated as if there was a secret I refused to tell him. When I gave him no answer and a confused look he continued on. “High school is a hard time in every person's life. The teenage years are definitely some of the hardest. So many emotions running through the body, hormones out of control, it’s easy to get confused about right and wrong.”

I stopped him; I knew where this was going. “Umm, just so you know, I can keep it in my pants!” I told him informatively, crossing my arms. “My girlfriend and I haven’t had sex yet.”

He seemed surprised at my answer and continued to pick his brain, trying to find the words to say. “Frank.” He said my name as if we were long lost friends. “You know if there’s anything you would like to discuss, you can tell me. I’m legally not allowed to tell your parents unless it is something I think that is dangerous to your health. So, if there it anything you feel like you need to get off your chest? Possibly some feelings you’ve been having?”

I got defensive, this guy was just getting on my nerves, “Yeah, you’re right!” I told him, unfolding my arms and scooting to the edge of my seat, “I do have a few feelings that you may want to be aware of!” I started counting on my fingers in a raised voice, “Annoyed. Confused. Frustrated. Pissed off. ” And in my head I added “Homicidal.” He doesn’t need to know about that one though.

He looked a little taken aback. “You can leave now!” he told me, but I was already up out of my chair, grabbing my bag, and heading for the door.

“Dick,” I muttered under my breath as I stormed out of the room and back to class.

What the fuck?