It Should've Been Me Instead Of Him

John.

It was so cold. I reluctantly opened my eyes, I knew it was morning already. I grabbed my cell phone from the nightstand and found out it was 10 am already. I rolled over and sat upright for a moment before getting up. I was thinking about everything had happened yesterday. I hadn’t talked to Julie yet. I did actually talk to her but I wasn’t sure if she listened to me cause she was asleep when I spilled everything out of my mouth. I got out of my bedroom and peeked into her bedroom, making sure if she was still asleep or not. My bad habits was oversleep but not for today. I found out Julie was still laying on her bed, sleeping soundly.

Not wanting to interrupt her, I went to the kitchen. I thought it'd be better if I made breakfast for her. Moreover after everything had happened yesterday, I wished this morning or even this whole day wouldn’t be as awkward as yesterday. I washed my face in the sink before taking some ingredients from the cabinet. I’d try to make pancakes. I used to make simple foods so I tried my best to make it. Moreover I was still sleepy, but all I did was for Julie. I wanted to have our breakfast together and impress her, actually.

It was kinda hard when I made the batter but it went successfully until I heard footsteps when I prepared the dining table. I knew it was Julie’s.

“What are you do-” she paused and I turned to looked at her. She smiled widely at me. “Oh my god, you shouldn’t. I can make it for us, you know.”

“It doesn’t matter.” I replied before taking a seat. “Just sit and have our breakfast.” She just nodded and did what she was told but changed her facial expressions once she scooped into her mouth. “What’s wrong?”

She just grimaced and I thought if there was something wrong. “I’ve never known there’s salty pancakes.”

“Really?” I frowned and she nodded before I scooped into my mouth and tasted how salty the pancake was. I grimaced and she laughed. “You’re right, it’s pretty salty.”

“You can never make complex foods, you know. although it’s pretty easy to make pancakes.” she teased me, chuckling. “Then lemme help you.”

“Fine.” I pouted, following her walk towards the counter.

She started making the batter and I just watched her until she turned to face me. “I wonder what you put into your pancakes.”

“Just sugar.” I said, pointing to a jar. “That’s it.”

“That is salt, John.” She laughed. “Couldn’t you just realize it?”

“I could but I was kinda sleepy so yeah..” I replied and she just chuckled in response. I scratched the back of my neck awkwardly. “I actually made it for you, wanna impress you.” I admitted and didn’t have a courage to look at her this time.

“Really?” She faked a shock look and smiled afterward. “I’m sorry then.”

“For?” I didn’t understand what she was sorry about.

“Uh yeah for making you make the salty pancakes just for impressing me.” She chuckled but stopped as she looked at me. She focused at the batter afterward and the situation went silent for awhile. “And I’m so sorry about yesterday. When-”

“Julie..” I cut her off. I knew what she was going to say. She was gonna talk about the kiss at the sidewalk and I didn’t want to talk about it. I had enjoyed the kiss and she didn’t have to be sorry. I expected if she enjoyed it too. She looked at me with her blank stare and I distracted her from the ‘kiss’ topic with taking the batter onto my fingers before poking her cheek for fun, making her cheek smudge. I laughed and she glared at me. I laughed even more but ran after realizing she’d do the same thing to me. She ran after me and caught me when I climbed onto the sofa.

“Gotcha!” she hollered, grinning devilishly. She put her hands which full of batter on my face, making it smudge from forehead to chin.

“It’s enough.” I rolled my eyes and she kept laughing. “I need to go to bathroom now.”

I walked towards the bathroom but she grabbed my hand. I looked at her in confusion. “I’m going first.” She stuck her tongue out before running into the bathroom. She hollered afterward. “You can use the sink instead!”

I sighed but did what she just told. I washed my face in the sink, removing all the batter on my face. Suddenly I heard a loud thud from the bathroom. I freaked out, thinking of what happened to Julie in the bathroom. “Julie, you okay?” I shouted in front of the door of the bathroom but she didn’t answer.

I was about to kick the door, I worried if something happened to her but suddenly the door swung open. She wasn’t standing. I was dumbfounded when I saw her in her position. She was lying on the floor but reached the door knob with one hand. I rushed to approach her and help her stand but she grimaced in pain. “I can’t.”

Eventually I carried her and laid her down on her bed. “I’m sure you’ll be fine if you’re on the bed all the day.”

“But Zack’s coming today and I won’t miss it, you know.” she whispered, making my heart crack slightly. “Moreover, it’s our anniversary.”

“I know. I know. You’re not gonna miss it.” I told her, stroking her hair. “You’ll better take a rest and I’ll go grab some food for you outside.”



“Finally!” Luna squealed once we arrived at the airport. “I really can’t wait to see Zack!”

“I wonder who actually his girlfriend is.” Cam said sarcastically and Luna apologized playfully.

I just laughed at their attitude and looked at Julie who sat next to me. She was just quiet and looked sad. “You okay?” I asked her quietly, squeezing her hand. Cam and Luna couldn’t hear us.

“I’m fine.” She said, smiling flatly before she opened the door.

She tried to get out of the car but suddenly she fell down. I was kinda shock and rushed to get out of the car before helping her. “I know you’re not okay! Don’t you ever say if you’re okay in this condition! Even I’ve said you’d better be home!”

I could see her eyes watered. I knew I was harsh enough towards her this time but I didn’t even mean to. I was just freaking out about her. “I’m really fine but thanks.” She said, looking away from me. “Luna can you help me?”

Luna just nodded her head before approaching and helping her walk. She didn’t even want a help from me just because I yelled at her. I was really sorry but whatever. I just worried. Luna gave me a ‘what’s wrong’ look but I just shrugged my shoulders and turned back when Cam poked my arms. “What’s the matter? Are you guys in a fight?”

I shook my head no. “I don’t know. I just worried about her.”

“You’re just afraid of losing her.” Cam said, smiling before walking away from me.