The Tangles of My Heart

The girls came to the beach later with some pizza and our crew, thank god. The girls went to the mall or something, I think, but the crew just kind of lazed around at the hotel all day, haha. Maddie spent the majority of the time digging Alex out, though. “Jack, sweetie, did you put on sunscreen?” Holly asked, tracing my Jack Skellington tattoo.

“Yeah,” I mumbled as I casually shrugged her off. I didn’t like when she touched my tattoos. The action reminded me of Taylor too much. And I picked Holly because she was the exact opposite of Taylor – a curvaceous sex pot that’s blonde as can be, literally and figuratively. Because opposites distract, and that’s all they could do, really – distract me from dwelling on my thoughts of Taylor...

I couldn’t forget her unless I managed to get amnesia or something.

“Really? ‘Cause you’re looking a bit sunburned,” Cassadee piped up with a soft laugh from her seat on Rian’s lap.

I squinted hard at my skin before shrugging again. Sure, I guess it was a bit redder than normal, but the sun was going down, anyways. I’d be fine… “Who’s Matt talking to?” I asked Vinny, arching an eyebrow at how completely engrossed in a textversation on his phone Flyzik appeared to be.

“Some girl he met on the hotel golf course today,” Evan explained when Vinny simply shrugged. “Got her number and everything. Not gonna lie, she’s pretty cute.” I just nodded, smirking at how completely smitten Flyzik looked right now.

“Golf course, huh? How is it?” I asked, and we quickly formulated plans to hit said golf course tomorrow. We didn’t really play golf all that well…we just liked to drink and drive the golf carts, haha.

After pizza, we went around the island – just walking around the beach, pretty much, mostly as couples. Our crew members went out on the town, though – bar hopping, probably.

Maddie and Alex had this couple thing down. They even had matching tattoos. Rian and Cassadee had it harder because they were the epitome of a long distance relationship. Cassadee actually had to leave in two days because her band was working on some new music. Zack and Bailey made a good couple, even though sometimes there was this strange unspoken tension between them that would arise every now and then, especially when Zack’s family got involved. Bailey didn't even come because she had some summer classes at school, so Zack went with the crew as well. We didn’t ask about it, though – Zack was the quiet one, and he liked to keep it that way.

And then you had me and Holly.

I really wasn’t feeling this long romantic walk on the beach scenario. Alex and Maddie were so into it, but I was more focused on trying to get Holly’s arms off me. She was super fucking clingy. I guess I just wasn’t used to it because Taylor was so fiercely independent – at least in public. I made sure to keep a good distance between us two couples.

Holly walked around with both her arms latched onto one of mine, babbling on and on about how perfect this vacation was and how much she loved being here with me. And also, she drops the “L” bomb rather frequently. I don’t think she’s noticed that I never actually reciprocate the sentiment. I always end up saying something else that’s roughly the equivalent of “I love you, too.” Sure, Holly and I had been dating for six months, but I only say that word when I mean it.

Oh, yeah. Contrary to popular belief, I don’t throw the “L” word around lightly. The “L” word is reserved for Alex, Zack, Rian, May, Joe, mom, dad, peanut butter, ice hockey, macaroni and cheese, the Baltimore Ravens, Kevin McAllister, our fans, and Taylor other things of that nature. Never have I ever said it to Holly. I could probably say it to Jordan, though – Jordan Merrick, Zack’s cousin. Oh, wait, I already do – but in the completely platonic way. Zack would kill any guy that gets near her, anyways.

I found myself thinking a lot about Taylor that night, so I decided that I needed some sex. Holly gladly obliged. And Holly knew better than to try and cuddle with me afterwards. After our first time, Holly wanted to, like, spoon, and I got into this huge argument with her about it, which I won. So, we established that I’m not the cuddling type. When I cuddled with Holly, the only thing I thought of was the way Warren and Taylor cuddled up in Taylor’s bed in Taylor’s apartment.

Everything…Everything was a crutch, and you can only lean on crutches for so long…

---

“We should save water and shower together, Jack,” Holly giggled seductively the next morning. Rian banged on our door to wake us up for brunch and golf.

“Very funny, Holly,” I laughed somewhat bitterly, getting out of bed and grabbing my towel off the rack. That line didn't work on Taylor when I used it...so.“I won’t be long,” I promised, getting into the bathroom and locking the door behind me. I took a quick shower as promised and got dressed in the bathroom, not even drying my hair. “Shower’s all yours, Holls,” I said as I exited the bathroom, steam coming out as I opened the door.

Holly smiled and walked past me into the bathroom, completely naked. “Thanks, sweetie!”

That was another thing – Holly loved to give me all these stupid pet names, and sweetie was her favorite. That was…That was something a grandma would call her grandkid. In other words, it was so sickeningly sweet it made me want to puke.

Now I knew how Taylor felt about the pet names. I knew she had some for me, but she never said them out loud. I didn’t like them either and I told Holly so, but she won the argument we had over that. I could call her Holly or Holls, but she got to whip out all these pet names on me. I had to agree to that. It was better than having to call her all sorts of pet names while she called me Jack.

Once I heard the water running, I left our hotel room for Alex’s – but his door had the little "do not disturb" thing on it, so I went on into the big suite our crew members shared. “Hey, does anyone have a hair straightener?” I asked after barging in. I had to stop and stare at the girl sitting on the bed with Flyzik, though.

“Oh, Alex left his in our bathroom, if you want to use it,” Flyzik piped up before returning his attention to the girl at his side.

My blood began to boil again, just like it did on that awful day last year. “What the fuck are you doing here, Taylor?” I asked, trying to keep my voice down, but I ended up yelling because I was so angry to see her again.

She got that stupid deer in headlights look on her face when I said that. “Wh-What?”

“And now you’re with Matt? Wow, you’re more of a whore than I thought you were!”

Matt protectively wrapped an arm around her. “Jack, what the fuck is your problem…”

“That bitch right there,” I scoffed, pointing at Taylor. I was glad to see our year apart had not been kind to her. “Seriously, Taylor, what the fuck are you doing here?”

She brushed her hair back. “Um…my name is Anna…”

What…the actual fuck…?

I had to stand there and stare at her for quite a while again after she said that. From afar she looked so much like Taylor! The resemblance was…uncanny. I just wasn’t thinking or seeing clearly, I guess. “I’m sorry,” I meekly apologized, head down. “I mistook you for somebody else,” I sighed, walking into the bathroom and grabbing the hair straightener.

Flyzik walked in a while later. “Jack, what the fuck was that out there?” he asked angrily.

Oh, that’s right – our crew knew nothing about Taylor and I.

“Nothing, Matt. Sorry...Just forget about it.”