Who Wouldn't Want To Be Me

“Hey little man,” Eric grinned as Parker waved at them, but didn’t move off of my lap.

“Somebody’s pretty attached to his new favorite uncle,” Tanya chuckled, and Parker beamed up at her.

“Me wuv Unca Cam!” he announced, hugging me again and nearly making tears come to my eyes. It must be a Staal thing to just steal somebody’s heart right from the get-go.

“Aw, I love you too bud; you’re my favorite nephew,” I told him, and Jordan chuckled.

“Not to mention your only nephew,”

“Well if Park’s your nephew that makes Levi one too, I guess,” Eric pointed out, and we all laughed.

“Hello? Anybody there?” we heard knocking at the door and Jordan got up to let his little brother in.

“Hi,” he waved at everyone.

“Hey Jare; how’d you sleep?” Tanya asked, and he shrugged.

“Good, I guess. Can we go skating?” he asked us, and both Eric and Jordan groaned.

“Do we have to?”

“Please! Come on, I never get to skate with you guys! Or Cam! Come on, please?” he sounded like an excited ten year old, and I couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Me go skate too!” Parker decided, joining in with his uncle.

“Well I guess I can’t say no to you,” I sighed, making Jordan smile. He texted Marc, who thought skating would be fun as well, and then I figured James would want to come too. Seeing as his roommate had taken off with Becka, most likely for the day.

We found a public rink and hauled all our gear inside; Parker insisting that I tie up his skates rather than his dad, who looked a little put-out.

“It’s just novelty Eric; don’t worry, he’ll get bored of me and want nothing but his daddy back,” I assured him, and Eric laughed before mussing up my hair, much the same way that he did to his other brothers.

“Sure, sure. At this rate he’ll want to go home with you,” he told me as we headed out onto the ice. It felt amazing to be able to just skate, and not really worry about having to do anything.

“LOOK!” Parker squealed, and we all watched as he took a few steps by himself, Eric hovering just inches away in case Parker was too fall.

“Atta boy!” Marc smiled, and soon all of his uncles were encouraging him, making his little grin grow.

“Hey Cam, would it be okay if you showed me some drills and stuff?” Jared shyly asked me.

“Sure, what kind of drills,” I asked, absentmindedly moving the puck around while I spoke to him. Dan had always complimented me on having good hands when it came to hockey, something I worked on constantly.

“Anything; anything you think will help me out,” he said, and watched me like an eagle as I showed him a few. None of the other guys wanted to do drills, so they hung around one end of the rink, keeping Parker entertained while I helped Jared run some easier drills at the other end.

“Wow, how did you do that?” he asked, and I stopped moving the puck around.

“Do what?”

“That! You don’t even look at the puck!” he said, and I shrugged.

“I blew out my knees in high school, and then later when I was seriously playing hockey. I couldn’t skate so I sat in my room or in the living room or wherever I was and practiced my stick-work. After a month of nothing but practicing that you get pretty good,” I allowed, and he shrugged.

We did a few partner drills, and defense drills, just whatever came to mind that I thought would help him out. Jared seemed to love every second of it, and by the time we joined the rest of the Staals and Neal we’d worked up a bit of a sweat.

“Thanks so much Cam; that was really cool,” he said, pulling me into a one-armed hug.

“No problem; that’s what brothers are for right?” I teased, and he laughed.

“Yeah! Hey, you guys want to scrimmage?” he asked the group. Parker’s feet had begun to hurt, so he was watching from the sidelines with his mom, Levi and Lindsay, contently munching on animal crackers.

“Sure, that sounds good,” seemed to be the general consensus. When teams were picked it was Me, Jordan and Jared versus Marc, Eric and James.

“No contact boys,” Tanya reminded us from the bench. We all rolled our eyes; as if we needed to be reminded of that. I thought back to the last time I’d played ‘for fun’, and how that had ended with bruised ribs when Talbot had taken all his anger out on me. Looking around I knew I’d never have to worry about that here; these guys were all like family to me.

I had to stifle a sob then. I shouldn’t be here right now, I shouldn’t be letting this become so close to my heart, because I could imagine how hurt they’d be when I had to tell them I’d lied to them. I wanted to, God I wanted to just blurt it out right here and now that I was a girl so that I could really be part of the Staals. More than anything I wished my dad was here right now to tell me what to do.

“Hey, Cam, you okay?” Marc asked, and I nodded, trying to get a grip on myself. I couldn’t do this, I didn’t need another breakdown and especially not in front of everybody.

“Y-yeah, I’m good,” I said, but the look in Jordan and James’s eyes told me they knew otherwise.

“It’s just… this reminds me a lot of the rink my dad and I used to play on,” I offered, and saw their expressions change immediately.

“Sorry Cam; if we would’ve known we could’ve went somewhere else,” Neal apologized, but I shook my head.

“No, it’s okay. I’ll be fine,” I took a shaky breath and managed to force a smile for them.

“Unca Cam okay?” Parker asked from the bench.

“Yeah Park, I’m okay,” I said, my voice cracking. Uncle Cam. Like that wouldn’t confuse the hell out of the little guy when I told them.

“Hug?” he asked, holding his arms out. I managed a smile, and skated over, letting him wrap his little arms around me and as I pressed my face against his took a deep breath.

“Awl better?” he asked and I nodded, pressing a quick kiss to the top of his head before ruffling his hair and making him giggle.

“All better,” I agreed, and tried to get a handle on my breathing as I skated back to the rest of the guys.