Bury Me Alive

xMesly’s p.o.v.x

It’s been nearly a week since Nick had pestered me to take the stupid pregnancy test, and I was really glad that he hadn’t had the chance to, since I was always with Matt.

Andy, Matt, and I resolved our issues… sort of.

“Hey Matt, you wanna go out and explore the city for a bit?” Andy asked

“I don’t know… I mean remember last time we did that?” Matt asked

“Well… we’ll take one of our other bands mates with us, and you can bring Mesly too.” Andy said

I looked up from a book I was reading.

“What?” I asked

“I was wondering if you guys wanted to explore the city a little bit.” Andy said

“Oh… um… I’m not really feeling well again, and I’m a bit under the weather, so you guys go.” I said

“You sure?” Matt asked

“Go ahead; you need your ‘guy time’.” I said

“Did I hear ‘guy time’? Count me in!” Ash said

“Me too!” CC said

“Hey what about me?” Jake asked

“Well Sammy is out of town, and I need to get out, I’m bored.” Jinxx said

“What’s going on?” Craig asked

I laughed.

“See it’s settled then, you can take all the guys with you to like a strip club or something and I’ll just stay here.” I said

“I don’t want to go, so I’ll take care of Mesly.” Nick offered

“Alright men, we leave in an hour so get ready.” Andy said

All the guys cheered and went to go get ready, while Matt came over to me and put his arm over my shoulders and leaned his head on my shoulder.

“Baby, how are you feeling?” Matt asked

“I’m okay, and yourself?” I asked

He sighed.

“I’m pretty good I guess. You want to go do something, or take a nap, I still have an hour.” Matt said

I pondered this.

“Yeah, a little nap sounds good.” I said

Matt smiled and kissed me before he lifted me up into his arms and took me over to the bunk and laid me down.

He got on top of me and in between my legs and started planting kissed from my neck all the way to my forehead.

I was actually starting to enjoy all the sex we were having, even though he wasn’t really the one I wanted to be with, so I put it aside and would imagine someone else with me instead of him.

Then I pushed Matt away.

“Matt, I need to-“I said

He immediately knew what was going on, and quickly grabbed me and took me to the bathroom, where he stood and waited while he held my hair.

I heaved once more and then I groaned.

“Let it all out Mesly, if you try to hold it in, it’ll be worse.” Matt said

“I don’t like doing this, it’s disgusting.” I complained

Matt chuckled.

“Well at the rate you’re going, I thought you would get over your fear of throwing up.” Matt said

I lifted my head up and threw up again.

“Not helping.” I said

“Sorry… I wish I could do something… but I can’t.” Matt said

I nodded.

“It’s okay, you’re doing enough.” I said

Then I lifted my head up and thought I was going to heave again, but I just gagged until nothing else came up.

“I think I’m done now… can you please help me up?” I asked

“Yes.” He sad

He put his arm under my torso and helped me up.

I brushed my teeth and splashed my face with cold water.

Once I was done Matt leaned in for a kiss and I turned away and covered my mouth.

“No, you don’t want to kiss this.” I said

“Yes, I do.” Matt said

“Gross, no I just threw up give me a few more minutes.” I said

“Fine, whatever you want.” He said

“Thanks.” I said

He smiled at me and kissed my forehead.

“Let’s go back to the bed.” Matt said

I nodded.

Matt scooped me up again and carried me, bridal style, back to the bunk.

He just wrapped his arms around me as I fell asleep.

***

I woke up and gasped.

The bunk was empty and I didn’t think that I was going to be able to make it to the bathroom so I leaned over and hurled.

Nick suddenly came over to me and held up my hair.

“No Nick, get away from me.” I said

“I’m used to it… come on Mesly I’m taking you to the doctors.” He said

“I don’t want to.” I complained

“Too dam* bad… are you done?” He asked

I nodded.

“I think so … I mean this comes out of nowhere.” I said

“Alright I’ll help you up, give me your hand.” He said

I gave him my hand and he helped me up and to the bathroom to clean myself up and then he gave me his sweater.

We walked to the car and Nick drove me to the hospital while I laid my head back against the seat and prayed that I wasn’t… well you know, that.

When we got there Nick sat me down on a chair while he went up to the counter and signed all the paper work.

Then when he was done he came over to me and sat down.

“You hanging in there?” He asked

I nodded and rested my head on his shoulder.

“Yeah… I just want all this to stop.” I said

He chuckled.

“Well if you are with child, then this will be worth it… I mean if I had children I would give them everything I possibly could, even my own life.” He said

I smiled.

“Why do you want me to be … ‘that’ so bad?” I asked

“There would be a little Mesly, and I would become an uncle, so therefore I can spoil the kid to death.” He said

“Mesly.” The nurse called

Nick and I got up at the same time.

“Are you Mesly?” She asked nick

He laughed and rolled his eyes.

“Nooo.” He said

“I’m Mesly.” I said

“Follow me please.” She said and glared at Nick

Nick held my hand and we followed the nurse into the room.

“I’m going to weight you and measure your height okay?” She asked me

I nodded.

The nurse helped me onto the scale and wrote down the results in her notes.

Then she had me step off it and move all the way to the wall so she could measure my height.

She wrote down some other things and then closed her folder.

“What are you in here for?” She asked

“I’ve been throwing up every day for no apparent reason, and getting dizzy, to the point where I can’t even stand up.” I said

She looked at me and then at Nick.

“Have you guys been… active lately?” She asked

We looked at each other with wide eyes.

“Oh hell no!” We said

“Sorry, I just had to ask I mean… you two look pretty close.” She said

Nick glared at her.

“She’s my cousin, hello.” He said

“Nick!” I said

He shut up and muttered some things to himself.

The nurse ignored me.

“Are you sexually active?” She asked

I blushed and nodded.

“Have you been using protection?” She asked

I was about to say no, but then I stopped to think about it… oh crud.

“That’s probably why you’ve been getting sick, it’s called morning sickness and most pregnant women get it.” She said

I gulped.

“Would you like us to check if you are?” She asked

I closed my eyes and lowered my head before nodding.

“Don’t be scared… it’ll be alright…” She said

I opened my eyes and smiled at her.

She hugged me and then glared at Nick again.

“I’ll be right back… I’m going to go get you a test.” She said

As soon as she walked out of the room Nick stuck his tongue out at her.

“Gosh she’s such a bit*h.” Nick said

“Come on she’s very nice.” I said

“Yeah, to you, I mean she fuc*ing glares at me every two seconds!” He said

“Well… maybe she could help me.” I said

“With what? Mes… you’re not thinking of … aborting it are you?” He asked

“No! Why the hell would I do that?!” I asked

“Just making sure.” He said

“Don’t be ridiculous… I may not have ever wanted children… but this could be-“ I said

“Yes?” he asked

“Nothing.” I said

“Mes what were you going to say?” Nick asked

The nurse walked back in and handed me a little stick.

“Okay there is a little small bathroom around the corner to your right. What you need to do is pee on this little tab thing and then put it on the counter for about a minute. I’ll tell you the results when you come back.” She said

I nodded and gave Nick a scared look before I walked out of the room and walked down the hall to the bathroom.

Before entering I took a deep breath and then opened the door.

Then I closed the door, walked over to the toilet, took off my pants and sat down.

When I was done I put the little stick on the counter and waited.

I checked on it again after a minute and couldn’t move.

Oh crud.

I picked it up and walked back to the room, it was locked, so I knocked.

“Uh- hold on!” The nurse said

What the-?

When she opened the door her hair was all messed up and her makeup was smeared.

“Come in.” She said

I cautiously walked in and sat down next to Nick, not daring to sit on the hospital bed.

“Well… honey… you’re pregnant.” She said

I knew it already, so I just stayed quiet as Nick hugged me and rubbed my shoulders.

“What am I going to do when they all find out?” I asked

“We’ll deal with it.” He said

“Here is some information about pregnancy… and you have to come back in for your appointments.” She said

I nodded.

“Thank you…” I said

She smiled at me and then escorted us to the door.

“Nick!” She said

We turned.

“Call me, okay?” She asked

Nick “smiled” and nodded.

“Okay, I will later.” He said

She waved and we got the hell out of there.

On the ride back I couldn’t think of anything but of the baby.

“Mesly?” He asked

I looked up at him.

“It’s going to be okay… if you don’t tell them now it will be worse.” Nick said

“I just can’t think of what to say I mean… don’t tell anyone, but I’m not sure who’s baby it is.” I said

“You what?!” He yelled

“Remember how Andy was my first… we used protection the first time… and I don’t remember the other times, but then right after I slept with Matt… so I don’t know who’s kid it is.” I said

Nick ran his hand through his hair.

“Well… Andy came first, okay that sounds wrong, but anyways I’m pretty sure it’s his… so just say it’s his.” Nick said

“What about Matt?” I asked

He’s going to kill me.

Nick sighed, a little frustrated.

“Okay Mes… don’t take this the wrong way, but why are you with Matt?” He asked

Again, he will literally kill me if I’m not with him!

“I um… he asked me.” I said

“That’s why? He’s such a douche bag, I honestly don’t see what you see in him.” Nick said

“Just please stay out of it, it’s my life.” I said

“Alright, whatever you say, I’m just trying to look out for you.” Nick said

“Look I’m sorry … I’m just under a lot of stress.” I said

He nodded and put one arm around me.

“I’m sorry about what I said about Matt…” He mumbled

I smiled.

“I forgive you, but please don’t tell anyone… I’ll deal with it.” I said

“My lips are sealed.” Nick said

“Thanks.” I said

He let go of me and turned into where all the buses were.

“I’m going to go into the venue to check out some things, are you going to be okay?” He asked

I nodded.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine, go on ahead.” I said

“Okay, if you need anything just call me okay?” He asked

I smiled and then walked towards the bus.

When I walked in I noticed there was a lot of yelling, and things were being thrown around.

“It wasn’t my fault okay?!” Matt yelled

“How was it not your fuc*ing fault?!” Andy yelled

Then I was about to walk back out when Andy turned towards me and grabbed my arm.

“Look at her in the eyes and tell her what you did, you sick bastard!” Andy said

I looked at him with questioned eyes.

“What did you do Matt?” I asked him

“I um…” He said

“You’re such a pus**! Mesly he was caught cheating on you with another girl!” Andy said

I couldn’t say anything, and Andy got quiet.

“What you’re not mad?” He asked

“Andy I …” I said

“How are you not mad?!” He yelled at me

“I don’t know okay?!” I yelled back

Then I ripped out of his grip and ran off the bus crying.

Why did he have to be such a jerk?

***