A Physics Prodigy From Ukraine

Mum found my wet pyjamas.

“Why are they wet? Did you wash them yourself?”
As if.
She knew I wouldn’t.
I opened my eyes and shot her a look.
“Well?”

Brendon kissed me.

I shook my head.
Well, what was the point?
If I had washed them;
They weren’t even clean.
She’d get mad.

If I hadn’t;
And I’d made a snow angel instead.
And Brendon kissed me.
She’d get mad.

“Did you shower in them?”

I hadn’t showered all week.
I shook my head again.
“Ryan!”
I closed my eyes.
“What?”
“What happened?”
Brendon kissed me.
“I made a snow angel.”

For once, she was at a loss for words.
“You made a snow…”
The thought solidified.
“Ryan!”
I groaned.
Annoyed.
Mum didn’t get the idea.
Cracking open the can of lemonade in my hand, I opened one eye.
“Yes?”
She threw the soaking pyjamas at me.

Not holding back then?

“You could have caught your death!”
“I wore a hat!”
“You wore a hat?”
“Yeah!”
She stormed out the room.
“WELL GOD FORBID SHOULD LACK OF A HAT CAUSE YOUR FINGERS TO DROP OFF!!”

I swigged the lemonade in a manly fashion.
I didn’t even like it.