C'est La Vie

Waking up the next morning was a bitch to say the least. I hadn't closed my shades last night because of my drunken stupor, so light flooded the room, burning my eyelids. I groaned and reached over next to me, grabbing a pillow and yanking it out from whatever it was stuck under. I covered my face with the pillow and stretched my legs out. When they hit a solid body I sat upright, the pillow dropping off my head.

Josh was sound asleep next to me. He was snoring gently and I could see his eyes fluttering beneath his eyelids as he dreamt. I shoved his shoulder roughly. What the fuck was he doing in my bed?!

"Josh! Get outta here!" I said, trying to wake up the boy. I shoved his shoulder once more, earning a little grunt from him. "Get out of my bed!"

"Tha' fuck?" he asked groggily, sitting up.

"What is your problem? Do you not speak English? Get out!"

If that man honestly thought he was going to try to get with me while I was drunk and sad he had another thing coming. Josh swung his legs out of the bed, an angry look settling over his face. He stormed out of the room wordlessly.

I looked down at my disheveled clothes from last night. My skirt was hitched up around my waist and my top was riding up over my belly button. I yanked both off and replaced them with some comfy leggings and a large sweatshirt.

I wandered down the hall moments later. As I was about to go downstairs Josh emerged from the bathroom. He ran a hand through his messy hair and looked at me with those crystal eyes of his.

"Why'd you kick me out? I didn't do anythin'," he asked, tilting his head to the side slightly.

"I can't believe you'd try to take advantage of me like that! You knew I was sad yesterday so you decided to use me as a rebound since your girlfriend broke up with you?!"

Josh looked at me, disbelief present in his eyes. I turned my back on him and headed down the stairs quickly, Josh two steps behind me.

"You think I tried to take advantage of you? Pretty sure it was you inviting me into your bed last night. I wouldn't be anywhere near you like tha' in a thousand years," he sneered.

A gentle cough came from somewhere near us and we both turned to look over our shoulders. I stepped back from him, where we had both been leaning into each other's faces as we yelled. Chris and Max were there worried smiles on their faces. Chris came over and pulled me away from Josh and Max.

He handed my laptop to me.

"Where did you get this?"

"Mom gave it to me this morning. She said you left it on the kitchen table. Why don't you skype or somethin'? We're goin' down to the studio today, so you'll be 'ome alone. You don't mind do you?"

Chris gave me a weary smile as I shook my head. No, I didn't mind. In fact, I was craving the alone time. I signed onto skype and sent a little wave towards my brother and Max as they left. I ignored Josh as he gave me one last look before closing the door.

Within minutes of me signed onto Skype, a chat box popped up. I grinned at my best friend's face as I clicked the 'answer call' button. A cheerful redhead smiled right back at me, waving frantically.

"JORDAN!" she squealed. I cringed, laughing.

Chelsea was one of, if not the, most energetic girl on this planet. She had long, vibrant red hair and freckles across her nose. One of those damn gingers, as we used to call her. Chels was also blessed with turquoise eyes that somehow turned green in the summer. She was easily the envy of other girls and the subject of attraction to guys.

Chelsea and I talked all day, only pausing for a moment for me to run and grab a sandwich. She detailed every last minute of her trip to Florida, including the guy she had met while down there. He seemed nice enough and I hoped he wouldn't hurt my best friend.

Soon after, Chelsea turned the tables on me.

"So where's your boy toy?" she questioned, pouting her lips at me.

"Nonexistent Chels. I'm not getting involved with anyone while I'm on vacation." I rolled my eyes. "That's just stupid."

"What's just stupid?"

I jumped out of the chair, clutching my laptop to my chest defensively.

"Fuck!" I exclaimed, staring at the boys that had just walked into the living room. "When did you get home?!"

My eyes wandered over the group as Chris talked. I didn't hear a word he said though. My focus was turned on Josh. He had his eyes set on his phone and was rapidly texting someone. He looked up suddenly, shoving his phone in his pocket and a hand through his hair.

I couldn't deny that Josh was attractive. His personality, on the other hand, was far from beautiful. He was still the same cocky man I had met on the plane. If he hadn't tried to take advantage of me maybe we could have been friends.

"Jordan? I really don't like the boob shot," Chels called. I looked down, pulling my computer away from my chest and blushing a bright shade of red.

"I'll text you tonight, alright?" Chelsea nodded. She blew me a kiss and signed off.

Closing my laptop, I sauntered over to my brother.

"So how was it?"

"We recorded a few songs and Josh did the vocals to the song you two wrote."

I looked across the room but Josh was no where to be seen. I shrugged.

"You know he didn't take advantage of you, right?" Chris asked slowly, broaching the subject cautiously.

"What are you talking about? Of course he did!"

"No, Jord, he didn't. You were all over him last night. If anything you were taking advantage of him. You even invited him to stay with you last night. Which I don't 'prove of 'course." Chris placed a hand gently on my shoulder. "You need to apologize. I think he's really 'urt."

As Chris talked I started to remember last night. I really was all over him. I felt a pang in my heart from sadness. I jumped up from my spot and left the room quickly. Wow, what was wrong with me? I always jumped to the stupidest conclusions. I wondered how often I hurt the people around me.

Josh was in the kitchen, leaning against the counter. He was munching on a cookie, a glass of milk in his right hand. I knocked quietly on the door frame. Josh looked up at me, a sad look in his eyes.

"Josh, I'm so sorry." I stepped forward quickly, taking the glass from his hand and placing it on the counter. "Please forgive me. I had no idea. I'm ashamed that I came to such an awful conclusion so quickly. I always do that. I can't help it."

I stepped forward and reached out. I let my arms wrap around Josh's waist as I leaned into him. He stood stiffly, not an inch of his body moving.

"I can't just forgive you. You accused me of somethin' I would never do. It hurts a lot Jordan. I thought maybe we were friends, yeah? Friends listen to each other."

Josh pushed me away gently. He turned and left through the back door. I stared at the spot he had just vacated. The pang in my chest had returned, this time followed by an empty feeling. Now nothing would be the same between us and it was all my fault.