The Middle

I was sitting in the team meeting with a smile etched on my face. I couldn’t stop thinking about Claire. I couldn’t wait to get back home. I was finally ready to ask her out on another date.

Ever since the gala, things have been going great. I had been wanting to ask Claire out again, but I didn’t want to push things. I knew that with both of our busy schedules and with both of us looking after Ryan, we didn’t have much time to talk. Jon looked over at me, raising his eyebrow.

“You okay, dude? You’ve had that goofy-ass smirk on your face since you walked in this morning for practice.”

I shrugged my shoulders.

“I’m great. I just can’t wait to get home.”

Jon’s face produced a smirk of it’s own.

“Oh, I get it. You mean you can’t wait to get home to Claire. What’s going on with you two anyway? You haven’t said a whole lot about her since the gala.”

The smirk on my face fell slightly.

“I don’t wanna talk about the gala. Things between Claire and I have been better since then. In fact, they’re better than they ever have been.”

Jon smiled and clapped his hand on my shoulder.

“Well, I’m happy for you, buddy. So, you gonna ask her out on another date?”

I didn’t say anything. I just simply nodded.

When the meeting was finished, I couldn’t get out of the room building faster. I almost ran over Jon in the process, but at the moment, I didn’t care. All I wanted was to get home to Claire. I knew that she was off today, so she was probably at home cleaning or on the phone with Ryan.

Before I got home, I decided to pick up dinner for the two of us. Claire loved Chinese food, and had her favourite place that she frequently went to when she was too lazy to cook or just wanted to treat herself.

After placing the order, I called my house phone. Claire had thought that I would be done with the meeting a lot later, but Coach ran out of things to yell at us about. We were playing well, but well wasn’t the best. We needed to get better in certain aspects of the game and Coach pinpointed each and every one of those in the meeting. I guess he was hoping that some of us would have questions or something, but we all just wanted to enjoy the day off. After I let my mind wander back to the meeting, I realized Claire hadn’t picked up the phone. I figured she was rather asleep, or on the other line. I didn’t leave a message, I hung up before the machine came on.

I paid for the food, grabbed the bags off the counter and was out the door. I couldn’t get the smile of my face. This, in my mind, was going to be one of the best nights ever. I had no doubt in my mind that Claire would say yes to my question, and that only made my smile grow.

When I arrived back to my apartment, I didn’t see Claire anywhere. I looked in the kitchen, nothing. Her bedroom, the bathroom, the balcony (in case she had gone insane) and nope, nothing there either. I was beginning to get worried. But then I took a small sigh of relief and realized, she must have gone to the hospital to visit Ryan. Another smile grew on my face as I got up off the couch, grabbed the food and my keys, and was back out the door.

Getting in my car, the aroma of the Chinese food floating in the air, I picture in my mind how much more perfect the night had become. I thought to myself What could be more perfect than asking Claire out on another date? Asking her in front of Ryan. It was a fool proof plan. Claire couldn’t say no once she saw how happy it would make Ryan.

When I arrived at the hospital, I could almost feel myself becoming nervous. I wasn’t sure why, though. I was comfortable around Claire and had gained a great relationship with Ryan. They were both a part of my life and I couldn’t see myself being happy without them.

I walked through the doors and down the hallway. Before going to Ryan’s room, I decided to go talk to Nat, just to see what Claire and Ryan were up to. I didn’t want to interrupt if they were having a heart-to-heart or anything. When Nat saw me, I was shocked to see her face fall. She walked up to me and my feelings were slowly changing from happy and nervous to complete and utterly confused.

“Hey Nat. What are Claire and Ryan up to? I finished early with my meeting today, so I wanted to surprise them with dinner.”

Nat’s gaze fell to the floor. I was beginning to think something was wrong with Ryan. Although I was sure Claire would have phoned me to let me know if anything had happened. Finally, Nat spoke.

“They’re not here, Pat. I told Claire to tell you.”

I raised my eyebrow.

“Wait, tell me what? What’s going on, Nat? Is something wrong with Ryan?”

She shook her head.

“No, nothing’s changed with Ryan. In fact, he’s on trial with a new treatment—“ I cut her off.

“Oh thank god. You had me worried for a minute.”

“You didn’t let me finish, Pat. The treatment isn’t being practiced here. Claire and Ryan left for Pittsburgh. Their flight left about a hour and a half ago.”

My jaw dropped and the bags of food went from my hands to the floor. I couldn’t believe it. Pittsburgh. They left. They left and Claire didn’t even give me a heads up. I couldn’t begin to understand just why Claire wouldn’t tell me that they were leaving.

“Why didn’t she tell me? How long has she known about this?”

Nat could sense that I was getting upset. She tried her best to calm me down.

“She only just found out today. There was a long list. Ryan’s name was put at the top, but Claire only had a short amount of time to make an answer. I told her to tell you. I’ve noticed how close you’ve gotten with the both of them. Claire seemed a lot happier whenever she talked about you, Ryan as well.”

I felt bad for Nat. She was trying to cheer me up, or at least let me see the bright side of this situation. Problem was, I just couldn’t wrap my head around it. I told Claire I would be there for her and Ryan. How can I be there when they’re in Pittsburgh?

“I just wish she would have told me. I would’ve convinced her to stay. Or at least wait, so I could go with them.”

“Pat, you wouldn’t have wanted them to wait. This treatment could prolong Ryan’s life. It’s what’s best for them. They’ll only be gone three weeks.”

I could feel tears began to spring in my eyes. I didn’t want Nat to see me cry so I just nodded and turned on my heel. I walked back out of the hospital and out to my car. As soon as I got in my car, I let the tears slowly fall down my face. I knew that Claire wasn’t my girlfriend or anything. That didn’t stop the fact that I felt betrayed by her. I told her she could tell me anything and that I would do anything for her or Ryan. I tried to convince her I wasn’t like the previous guys that had been around Ryan. I thought she had come around and realized that. Maybe this was just me being selfish, but I was beginning to be angry with Claire. Angry that she didn’t think I had a right to know that she was leaving before she left. More than that, she didn’t let me say good bye to her or Ryan.

I was teetering between being sad and angry, with tears running down my face for about 20 minutes, before finally starting my car and heading home. I didn’t even care that I had left the food in the hospital.

Arriving back at my apartment I decided I wanted some answers. More than that, I deserved some answers, from Claire. Nat had told me that the flight to Pittsburgh left about an hour a half before I got to the hospital. By the time I got home, Claire and Ryan would have been in Pittsburgh for a good 40 minutes. I figured I’d given her enough time, so I picked up my phone and dialed Claire’s number. After a few rings, she finally answered.

“Hi Pat.”

I was about to snap.

“Hi Pat?!?! Hi Pat? You leave for Pittsburgh for three weeks while I’m out for the day without telling me and all I get is a ‘Hi Pat’?!? Really, Claire?”

I knew I probably shouldn’t have been that harsh right off the hop, but I couldn’t hold it back.

“I’m sorry, Pat. I didn’t know how to tell you while you were in your meeting. I knew if I would’ve told you on the phone or in person, you would’ve convinced me to stay, even if you didn’t know it. This is what’s best for Ryan. This could help him a lot. Please, see it from my side. I’m just doing what’s best for Ryan.”

I pulled the phone away from my ear, stared at it while raising my eyebrow. Finally I brought it back to my ear.

“What do you mean, I would have convinced you without knowing it?”

I heard her sigh. I was beginning to think I wasn’t supposed to hear that.

“I just mean that, you know, you’ve become a big part of our lives now. I’m not sure what exactly is going on between you and I, but I’m pretty sure that if you begged me to stay, I would’ve. But, I would feel guilty about not taking the oppourtunity for Ryan, so would you.”

It was my turn to sigh. I had realized that it was possible I didn’t think this too far.

“I just wish you would’ve at least said goodbye. I found out that you left from Nat.”

“Nat? How did you find out from Nat? I left you a note.”

“I was done with my meeting early, so I went to Bok Choy, to get your favourite Chinese and when you weren’t home, I went to the hospital. I was going to surprise you and Ryan. I had something to ask you.”

I instantly regretted telling her that. I didn’t know how she would feel about me saying I wanted to ask her out on another date with her miles away.

“Uhh.. Pat, I have to go. The nurse doesn’t want me to have my cell phone on in the room and I want to stay on her good side so I can sleep here. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

Before I could respond, she had hung up. I closed my phone and tossed it onto my coffee table.

….so much for the best day ever…..