Cries of a Love Bat

“Pete,” I whispered, looking at him as he walked over. His hands and shoulders were shaking and his breathing was deep and staggered, his eyes were tinted red but not from the lack of sleep. He jaw was set tight and his posture was straight, not the usual hunched over shoulders.

“What are you doing here?” he hissed, his eyes darting over the three of us.

“Pete, this is no way to be acting,” William stated. “Channel the anger, like we taught you.”

“You…you caved!” I exclaimed in disbelief. He couldn’t have become one of them.

“No, no, no,” William said, shaking his head. He placed a careful hand on my shoulder, much to Pete’s disapproval. “He is not one of us, he is more of a…an acquaintance to put it simply.”

“How could you?” I asked.

“Will, what did you do to her?” Pete snapped, eying my body and ignoring my question.

I quickly realized that I was still a mess from training and Pete was taking this the wrong way. “They didn’t do this,” I said quickly. “I was training with the guys; learning to fight.”

“See, no need to overreact,” William said lightly, pulling his hand off my shoulder.

Pete stuck his hand out to me, his fingers still shaking. “I’m taking you home.”

“We we’re having fun! I was just getting to know her,” Gabe laughed, smirking over at Pete.

“Stay away from her Saporta,” Pete demanded. “You fuck with her and I’ll kill you.”

I put my hand out to grab his and he laced our fingers together, skin cold under mine. In that little contact I felt better, like I wasn’t as tired, and I felt somewhat stronger.

“You know the rules Pete. It’ll only be a matter of time before we move on,” William said as I was being dragged out of the diner. “You can’t protect her for much longer…”

Pete’s eyes darkened as he heard this, tightening his grip on my hand. We left the diner in a hurry, walking through various alleyways and down many streets in a memorized pattern. Pete wasn’t wondering; he was taking me somewhere.

When we reached the dead end in the alley, he pulled an escape ladder down from the side of a building and motioned me up, not saying a word as I walked up small metal steps. They were narrower then I thought, so when I slipped on one Pete placed a hand on my calf, guiding me to the nearest step.

“Thanks,” I said quietly, as I continued back up the ladder.

We reached the first landing, a good fifteen feet from the ground, and he opened a window, unlocking it from the inside by bashing his fist through the glass. He climbed inside and went to the door next to it, swinging it open for me and walking away.

The room was chilly and dark enough that I only saw a few five feet in front of me. It was silent, but I could sense Pete futzing around, grabbing and moving things. When a small flame lit up the room, I saw Pete walking towards me, holding it out for me to take.

I took the holder and stayed where I was, except to shut the side door behind me. After I turned back around I noticed more candles were shining light around the room, variously placed on holders and shelves.

“Brendon and Ryan told me about his place.” Pete’s voice broke the silence in a gruff tone as he place five blankets on top of each other on the floor. He opened a dresser and grabbed a black tarp-looking thing from the draw and hung it over the busted window. “They said it was a good place to hide…stocked up on some random things.”

“Nice of them,” I whispered, still standing in that one spot and watching his every move.

He glanced at me, freezing his movements; not sitting down on the blankets. “You’re scared of me.”

“You’re an acquaintance of them.” My voice was still barely above a whisper.

“Ryan and Brendon are one of them. They’re Dandies.”

“I don’t know Pete,” I breathed. “I want to go home.”

The silence that enveloped us was unnerving; it blanketed us for a while. Pete walked over to me; each step was with hesitation, but the pause after them seemed planned. He didn’t have to say it, if I wanted to turn and run he was giving me the time to do it. When he was inches away from me I felt my heart start racing. His hand that reached out to mine made me flinch, and he pulled back instantly.

“I didn’t change,” he said helplessly. “Emily you have to realize that.”

I shook my head, water spilling over the brim of my eyes. “You did, you did.”

“Don’t…don’t cry. Emily I know you’re scared and confused, and I know this doesn’t make sense but let me tell you. Give me a chance.” I’d never heard him sound so scared, his voice was cracking and uneven. “I can’t do this without you.”

“I don’t want to do this without you either. I don’t think I can…” His reached out and pulled me to him, his arms linking around my body, crushing me into him. “You were gone for so long.”

“I know,” he said, pressing his face into my hair. “I know, but let me tell you. I can’t do this unless you let me.”

I looked up at him. “I let you.”

He took me slowly to the blankets, sitting me in his lap with his arms still around me. “I didn’t know about the nightmares, not until Will told me. He said they would get worse, and only I could stop them. I told him I would do it. Emily you’re getting weaker. The longer we’re apart the worse it gets. You don’t have the time to…”

“Pete what?” I asked, confused. “You’re not making sense.”

“He won’t let me tell you. I…can’t say it. I…” he was struggling. “You can’t let him get to you; as soon as he is in your head its over. Promise me you won’t.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Promise me,” he said, but his tone wasn’t angry, it was upset and worried.

“I promise.”