I Love You More Than I Can Ever Scream

Andy let Ashley drive to his house as he was over-run with feelings. ‘Love isn’t always fair’ he thought and sighed. When the car came to a hault he pulled himself from his thoughts and Ashley turned to him.
“Are you ready to do this?”
“Yes.” Andy sighed. He was. But he was scared his parents wouldn’t care more than anything.

He left his back pack in the car, knowing they would be back out here soon. They walked to the door and Andy unlocked it and let them in.
“H-Hello?” He called before venturing further into the house.
“Anybody here?” No reply. He sighed and went into the kitchen finding a note scrawled on white paper with a blue biro.
It read ‘Gone to Miami for weekend. Be back Monday. Love mum and dad.’ Andy scoffed and threw out the note. He slammed both hands onto the counter trying to stop the tears reaching his eyes. He though to himself ‘they just left. No warning. Again?! I’m sick of this!’ At that moment Ashley came in.
“What’s wrong?” Andy just shook his head.
“Nothing my love. Don’t worry.” Andy smiled but it never reached his eyes. Ashley knew he was lying but decided to leave it for a better time.

Andy decided to leave a note for his parents to tell them where he’d be. It read
‘Gone to Ashley’s for a week. Maybe more. Don’t know. Not that you care.
-Andy
He decided to leave the part out about him being homosexual and dating his best friend for the time being. He really didn’t want to know how they would react.
Ashley stood behind him the entire time and when Andy was finished he gestured for Andy to go to his room and get his things. As Andy went to his room Ashley placed himself on the sofa in the middle of the large living room. He sighed. If only Andy would tell him what was wrong. He heard footsteps walking around upstairs, probably getting everything together.

Andy Walked around his room grabbing everything he assumed he would need; School books, clothes, shoes, accessories, make up, his lyric notebook, his drawing book and his iPod and phone chargers. He quickly threw these items messily into a large grey duffel bag and headed down the stairs. He put his fake smile back on his face and called Ashley.
“I’m ready, you coming.”
“Sure.” Ashley smiled and pulled himself off the sofa joining Andy.
“Got your keys?” Andy chuckled and answered.
“Yes I do. Let’s go.” Little did Ashley know, Andy really never wanted to come back.

The ride to Ashley’s was quick and silent. As they reached Ashley’s house Andy smiled. It was much like his own, detached and painted but it was always more welcome. Ashley’s parents never knew why Andy was here so much. But it seemed to usually revolve around his parents or the fact that he had been in love with Ashley for quite some time.

They got out of the car and Ashley waited for Andy and linked a hand with his.
“Oh yes, we still have to tell my parents about…us.” Ashley smiled at Andy but Andy did not return it. Andy was always scared about people finding out about his sexuality. And this was no exception.
“I know you’re scared Andy, but you shouldn’t be. If you want you can just go put your stuff in my room while I tell my parents? After all you should where it is” Ashley chuckled. Andy smiled. He liked that idea. He just nodded. He always seemed to become quiet when he was nervous.

Walking into the house Andy clambered up the staircase to is boyfriends room and dumped his duffel bag in the corner. He smiled and looked around. Ashley was much like himself. Posters everywhere. He chuckled and turned about to leave. As he turned he saw something sitting on Ashley’s nightstand. It was a photo of the two of the, his mother had taken two years ago. Ashley was making a goofy face and Andy was pretending to kiss his cheek. He smiled remembering that day. He sat on Ashleys bed and picked up the photo and studied it carefully. Tears began pricking his eyes and he set it down. Oh how he wished he could be happy like that again.

He took a deep breath and stoop up to find Ashley standing in the doorway. One elbow leant against it.
“I knew you weren’t OK.” Andy bit his lip but spoke.
“I-I’m fine silly!” Ashley sighed and joined Andy on his bed.
“I know you too well to buy that…” Ashley put a hand under Andys chin and make him look in his eyes.
“Please. Tell me.” He pleaded. This was it for Andy. He began to sob uncontrollably. He hunched over so his head was near his knees. Ashley rubbed comforting circles on his boyfriends back. It was heart wrenching to see him like this. Andy began to speak. Spilling everything.
“Whyc an’t I have parents like yours? Why don’t mine care for me? Do they not love me. Why can’t we go back to then!?” He said between sobs pointing at the picture on the nightstand. Ashley hugged him and Andy kept speaking.
“I don’t want to be broke Ashley. I really don’t please…help me.” Ashley kissed Andys forehead and spoke softly.
“Andy, I promise you with all my heart I will try and fix you, to put you back together again. You can stay here as long as you’d like. My parents are happy for us and understand we’ll be wanting to see each other even more now. I promise I’ll protect you. Always and forever.” Andys sobs slowed ad he sat up looking towards Ashley.
“You really mean it?”
“I do… Always and forever.” Andy manouvered himself so he was facing Ashley and pulled him into a long, but sweet kiss.
“I love you Ashley.” He said pulling away.
“I love you too Andy.” He smield and wiped away Andys tears off his cheek.
“No I think we should get some sleep. It’s been a long day.” Andy nodded and they both got changed and climbed into bed.

Snuggled close to Ashley in the silk black and turquoise sheets of their bed. Andy sighed with a smile on his face. This is where he really felt at home. His old house was just a house. But until now he’d never felt truly at home. Having Ashley beside him made him feel complete. Ashleys strong arm draped over Andys small waist and pulled him close.
“I love you my dear.” Mumbled Ashley in his dreary state.
“I love you more than I can ever scream.” Replied Andy quoting his song he’d wrote for Ashley all those years ago.
A smile was stuck on his face as he drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

For the first time in his life, he felt truly happy. And NOTHING could take it away.