My Guardian Vampire

Gerard looked at me, his face serious.

“You know as well as I do that sex doesn’t matter for love Ali. No matter what happens, I will love you the same. I know we haven’t talked about it, but I want you to know I love you no matter what you or someone else does to you, okay? Your body has nothing to do with who you are.”

He took my face and kissed me as he wiped away my tears. After a few moments he broke off the kiss, and looked at me, beginning to smile slightly.

“Besides, you know you do have a only a towel on, right?”

I giggled loudly, and quickly put my hand over my mouth. We waited a moment, but the noise from the other side of the door continued at its normal pace.

“You know I might actually take you up on that offer,” I said.

Gerard cocked an eyebrow smirking, but after a moment of my expression not faulting, his eyes widened at my serious stare, his smirk now gone.

“You’re being serious?” he choked out. “It was just a joke, I didn’t mean to pressure you into-”

“Gerard,” I interrupted, looking away. “I know this is weird, but I really, really don’t want Billie Joe to be the first person to see all of me.”

“I understand,” Gerard said. “But you don’t need to, I mean if you a-are uncomfortable, then just don’t--don’t even bother.”

He was babbling, looking really nervous and embarrassed. I leaned up and kissed him deeply. It might have not seemed really important, but in my mind it served as a symbol of how I would always be with Gerard, and how much I loved him and wanted to tell him everything from now on. No more secrets, no more anything.

“I love you Gerard,” I said once I broke off the kiss. He nodded, and I stepped a few feet back from him. He stood there, looking a little bit less nervous now. His back was straight and his face dead forward as if this was something really important--and I hoped he thought it was.

I sighed once, and then took in a deep breath, feeling the cloth of the towel beneath my fingers. My heart was pounding, but I had to do this.

I let go, and it fell down.

Gerard’s face began to change with emotion, and I looked down. If he thought I was ugly… Well, I just didn’t want to see it. I heard Gerard walk towards me, his footsteps loud as everything else in my world became mute. His feet stopped, and suddenly I felt his cool skin on my burning cheeks, making me jump.

“Ali,” Gerard said as one of his hands held my face. His other hand was brushing the skin on my arm lightly, giving me chills.

“Yes Gerard?” I mumbled, my self- confidence plummeting as self-doubt and hate rose with each moment passing. I felt tears come to my eyes; Gerard must have thought I was horribly ugly, rather giving me to Billie than have me love him-

“Ali,” he repeated, and I forced myself to look at him.

He looked deeply into my eyes, and rubbed my cheek softly.

“You’re beautiful.”

My heart jumped.

“R-really?” I asked, regretting it as soon as I said it. If he changed his mind-

“Really,” he answered, cutting off my thoughts. “You’re the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.” Gerard looked down at my body, making me blush insanely. "Inside and out."

“Okay, okay, that’s enough,” I said, laughing.

“Never,” Gerard said, smirking. He pulled me into a deep embrace, kissing the top of my forehead. “I will always want to look at you, no matter what you look like. I want to stare at you forever.”

“I love you, Gerard,” I said, hugging him tighter. I never wanted to lose him.

“I love you Ali,” Gerard said, kissing the top of my head again. “I wish we could leave; escape out the window right now. If Billie wasn’t so damn fast we could run away, forever.”

“I know. If only. I know we will get through this, no matter what.”

“No matter what,” Gerard echoed, pulling away from me and smiling. He started to smirk, and his hands that were on my back went a little lower-

“Hey, it’s only for looking!” I said, taking my hand to move his upwards. He snarled and began to give me light kisses on my neck, making me laugh as they tickled.

“Get out of there!” I heard someone yell. The door suddenly opened. I didn’t know who it was but I shrunk myself behind Gerard, thanking that he was facing the door so no one could see me.

“Get the fuck out of here,” someone growled. I recognized it as Billie. Gerard turned around slowly, carefully making it so that Billie couldn’t see most of me.

“Okay, Billie,” Gerard said, his voice level and calm. I quickly pulled up my towel that had been on the floor and wrapped it around me. “You have a towel on, Ali?”

“Yes,” I said, and Gerard nodded, and walked towards the door where Billie was standing. Before he could go through the door, Billie shoved him against the wall.

“Billie!” I yelled, my eyes going wide. Billie ignored me.

“Try that ever again, I’ll fucking kill all of your friends there. And I’ll make you watch before killing you slowly.”

Gerard still stayed calm.

“Okay, Billie. Duly noted.”

Billie let Gerard go, and Gerard walked out before taking a last look at me.

“Make sure he doesn’t do anything to her, or swear to god I’ll-” I heard Gerard say. I became confused, but the confusion disappeared as Billie began to step towards me slowly.

He walked up to me, and I held onto my towel tightly as I closed my eyes, trying to imagine myself somewhere else.

“Ali,” he said, his voice emotionless. “Please open your eyes, I won’t hit you.” I complied slowly. He didn’t look mad, more hurt. “Why did he ask if you had your towel on?”

My face dropped and my eyes went wide. My brain tried thinking of a good lie.

“I--Well, I was-“

“Never mind,” Billie said cutting me off. He held my face for a moment lightly, looking at mine. He winced for some reason as he touched my skin, as if he expected it to hurt him. “I don’t want to know. I think it would hurt too much at this point.” He then walked out the door and shut it behind him.

I stood there, confused. I was expecting him to murder me, but yet... he just seemed actually sad.

‘Talk about mood swings…’

I got dressed silently, putting the stupid lacy underwear on as I became lost in thought. It seemed I was really hurting Billie, and while I did hate him, I just wanted him to leave me alone. I had no intention of hurting him, or anyone, at all. I had done enough of that already.

I opened the door a little bit.

“Alright, I’m ready to come out,” I said, peaking my head around the door. I looked at the guards. “Can you turn around, please?” I asked quietly. They gave each other weird looks as if not expecting me to ask nicely. I had really been affected by how hurt Billie had looked, I guess.

They actually did turn around without any objections, surprising me in return.

I had put the towel around me as the underwear was really revealing, but as Amber got the dress and told me she was ready to start, I had to take the towel off. I did, and I heard most of my friends laugh, but I didn’t look at them. Brittany and Tonya whistled simultaneously. I looked down at the ground solemnly, my cheeks blushing a light red from embarrassment, almost matching the color of the lingerie.

“Okay, dress time,” I said quietly.

“You okay, sweetie?” Tonya asked, the room now becoming silent in seriousness.

“Yeah,” I said, raising my head slightly and putting on a small smile. She nodded, and then Amber and Tonya began to help me into my dress as my other friends did who knows what.