Yesterday's Feelings

The next morning I decided that I wouldn't be going to pick up Danielle after all. I called Colin and asked him to keep her until the afternoon and then I'd be by to pick her up. I thought that should Eric need to explode or yell or get angry, Danielle wouldn't have to hear it. Perhaps it stemmed from hearing Gene and my Mother fighting all that time but I never wanted to expose her to that.

There was a knock at the door at around 12:30. I went to answer it, of course, it was Eric. He was smiling and he looked much better, much more calm than yesterday. "Hi." He said, "I, um, I brought you some flowers." He said, presenting me with a spring bouquet.

I smiled a little, "Oh, thanks. Come on in." I said, moving aside as I took the flowers from him. They were nice. But, they weren't roses. I was sure he was as nervous as I was after three years.

Eric came inside and looked around. I guess he was surveying the changes in the house since he'd last been here. Honestly, not much had changed. Family pictures still hung about only there were more of just Danielle and I and not a family of three or four. "I like what you've done with it."

I laughed, "Ha!" as I headed in to the kitchen to put the bouquet in some water. "It hasn't changed a whole lot." I admitted as I set the smaller bouquet, next to the roses that John had given me. I leaned forward to smell them and smiled some.

"I take it dinner with your friend went well." Eric asked.

I nodded, "Yes. Can I get you coffee, or tea, or a beer, or apple juice, or anything?" I asked Eric as he sat at the kitchen table. I wasn't avoiding the questions, I just figured we'd get there in a minute.

"No, no thanks." He said, taking his hat off and running his hand through his hair.

I made myself a cup of coffee and sat down across the table from Eric. He looked good. He still had the same style glasses, the same haircut, the same piercing blue eyes. He had a scruff on his face that said he hadn't shaved in a day or two, and the light was still bouncing off the pickax around his neck. "So, what really brings you by?" I asked. Eric hadn't changed, not a bit.

Eric shrugged, "I missed you. Seeing you at the bar just brought everything back." Eric sighed, his hand on the counter. I noticed he had a few more rings, one in particular that stood out. Left hand, ring finger. Was Eric now married and John just forgot to tell me? No way John would have not mentioned that at lunch or our date.

I nodded and sipped on my coffee, bringing my legs up to my chest on the chair. I felt somehow like the shy girl who just got told the big popular guy has a crush on her. Awkward and like I was going to just laugh, "Eric, it's a little late for 'I miss yous now." I pointed out.

Eric frowned a little bit and slumped back in his chair, "You don't miss me?" He asked.

I sighed, "I do.." I set my cup down on the table. "I miss what we had, as friends. I don't miss how it ended. Besides, it's been three years and I've moved on with my life." I said softly, "I've got a different set of priorities now."

Eric leaned in towards the table, "What do you mean you've moved on?"

"I can't just stay an upset, broken 19 year old girl forever Eric." I pointed out to him, "At some point, I had to begin to pick up the pieces. Besides, It's not like I really have time to date when I'm taking care of Dani. I've gone on three dates in three years." I shrugged.

Eric smiled a little, "Maybe your standards are too high." he said with a chuckle.

I rolled my eyes, "Enough about me." I said, sitting there and pulling my hair back as I watched him, my eye settling on the ring on his wedding ring finger, "I see not everything is all the same with you."

Eric looked perplexed before he caught my gaze and he blushed, "Oh, this old thing?" and his face fell, "Well, I found out the hard way just how manipulative some people can be." He said softly.

To be honest I wanted all the details, "What happened?" My interest was piqued and now I wanted to know what happened to Eric in three years. I was tired of people asking about me and my life. My life, to be honest, was boring.

Eric sighed and scratched his head. He looked away and then looked at me, "You sure you want to know?" He asked, looking at me. "Can I have a cup of coffee then?" He asked politely.

I got up and got Eric a cup of coffee and set the creamer and sugar on the table, "Here you go." I said, sitting back down, interested in what he was about to say.

"You remember Rachel?" Eric asked, looking at me sadly.

How could I forget? She pretty much destroyed Eric and I. She got what she had wanted in the end and at the time Eric and i split, she could have kept him locked in a cage for all I cared. "Yeah, of course." I tried to hide my still lingering bitterness, but it was a little rough.

Eric sighed and added some cream and sugar to his coffee, "Well, after you left, I called Susan and had her fired." I was a little surprised, "I begged for Susan to put you back with me. At least I could be close to you but, she told me you were on leave and she didn't know if you were going to come back." He paused, "You never came back."

I felt bad because I never went back to work for Susan. I had to tell her that because of Danielle, I couldn't come back to work for her. I had no choice but to leave the agency, "Keep going." I said, obviously the story didn't end there.

"Anyways." Eric sipped on his coffee, "Anyways, I got assigned another assistant and things went on. Only a couple of months down the road I ran in to Rachel and she had this..." Eric paused and turn to the side motioning with his hand a large belly.

I watched him and tried not to laugh, "A belly? She was pregnant?" I groaned a little. Awesome. Married with Children. I guess my life wasn't the only one that had been fucked up three years ago.

"Yeah, she told me it was mine." Eric said, "So, you know, I did the 'Right' thing." He used the air quotes, "I made a huge mistake by doing it. I married her and it was like we were fucking playing house. Except she was way, way more controlling than she ever had been running my career." Eric sighed, "She tried to get Susan to switch her back to being my manager. She insisted on going to every event." Eric pushed his hands through his hair, "She was a nightmare."

I just looked at him. I kind of felt sorry for him for having to put up with her bullshit, "I'm sorry." I said frowning in to my coffee. Somehow I felt like he could have easily had it all different if I hadn't have ignored him. But it was too late for all that.

"Well, she had a little boy. Brown hair, brown eyes. Looked just like her nothing like me." Eric shrugged, "I didn't think none of it. She said he was mine and I had nothing to worry about." Eric looked down at his coffee. "I should have never trusted her." He shook his head. "As he got older though, my mom and pop started pointing out that he really was beginning to look nothing like me. You know, I tried to tell myself they were wrong."

I frowned as I listened to the older man. He sounded so heartbroken by what had happened. I felt bad for him. Well, a part of me didn't because he was dumb enough to fall for her bullshit. Everyone makes mistakes though and obviously this one of Eric's mistakes, a big one. "I'm sorry." I said, my voice quiet and soft.

"About eight months ago, my s-" Eric stopped himself and cleared his throat, "Well, the kid broke his arm and we had to take him to the hospital. I had a DNA test done and I got the results back." Eric looked at me, an obvious pain in those blue eyes of his, "He wasn't my son." Eric sighed, "After all the dirty diapers, late night feedings, teaching him to walk, say 'Dada' and 'I love you daddy'. It was like someone had fucking ripped out my heart and just mashed on it."

Eric sat quiet for several minutes, just staring in to his coffee. "Eric, I'm sorry. I.. I can't imagine going through all that with him and then finding out that he's not your son. I am sure that couldn't have been easy at all. I can see it still affects you very much." I tried to be as sensitive as I could.

"She's seeking spousal, custody, and half my assets." Eric shook his head, "She trapped me and I fell for it. Some days I feel like the dumbest guy on the planet." Eric frowned, "But, the worst part of this is, is that I still feel like he's my son and like, I can't just walk away from him like that. Her, yeah, but him, it's not that easy."

I sighed and smiled a little bit, "Eric, nothing in life is simple or easy." I said, settling my legs on to the floor and leaning in towards the older man, "I think it's very admirable that you still want to be a part of his life. You're the only father he's ever had and you can't help that his mom is a bitch. It's not fair to him to suffer and go without such a great male role model in his life because of her stupidity." I said quietly.

We continued to talk for a while, though the conversation was mostly somber. The fact that Eric had been married and was now separated wasn't any easier to swallow. The fact that some bitch had tricked him in to raising a child that wasn't his was just down right low and dirty and no man deserved that. Especially not Eric, he had been a good guy and she had taken advantage of that. She had really taken advantage of that.

It made me angry.