In Another Life

I awake with slight perspiration across my brow. I hadn’t a clue where my home was and I didn’t want to take the chance of getting lost. Considering I probably wouldn’t find my way back to the hotel I was currently staying in.

I missed my parents. Even though I didn’t remember them or their faces, I still missed them, and I knew of course that I loved them. I sighed. I needed more clues. Finding yourself is the hardest thing I could possibly imagine doing. I had to come up with a little way to be able to keep my memory going. To try to bring back something. I decided to write in a small diary that I would be able to fit into my purse. I wrote minor things, major things, thoughts, wonders, everything.

I supposed it was time to start the day and start my journey.
I walked to this café /bistro that was off the corner from where I was staying. It was small, cute, cozy. It helped with my thought process. A very dashing and handsome young man spots me and looks at me for a moment first with confusion, then excitement. I was slightly startled and uncomfortable when he approached my table and sat down.

“Monroe, what are you doing here my dear? I thought you went to the United States for awhile? Oh I’ve missed you dearly. My heart ached everyday that you were gone. How are you parents?”

I stare at him blankly, scared because I couldn’t answer any of his questions. And then it happened: I started to cry. I couldn’t help it. Oh bloody hell. I hated crying in public. I excused myself to the Lou to go and clean my eyes. I look at myself in the mirror. My hazel eyes staring directly back at me. I looked frightened. I need to at least have some sort of composure. I can’t break down all of the time. Besides, it shows some sort of weakness that could potentially hurt me in the long run.

I leave the Lou and still see the young man sitting there twiddling his thumbs. He was rather handsome; in a rugged kind of way. He had dark brooding eyes with sand colored hair. I took a deep breath and relax. I sit down, fold my hands and just look at him. Of course he’s just smiling. I give him a faint smile. I clear my throat and sit forward.

“I’m sorry, But, do I know you?”

He chuckles as if the question were ridiculous.

“Of course you do you doll.”

I burrow my eye brows.

“I’m not sure I do…”

His face becomes serious as if I’m playing a game with him. But I’m not.

“Blimey, Monroe!!!! What’s gotten into you?? How could you pretend to forget your own fiance?? Blasted blatancy!!!”

My eyes widen and I taken in a short quick breath. I look down at my hands and see a big stone on my left ring finger. It was beautiful. I reach out to grab his hand. He un-hesitantly gently grabs my hand in response. He sighs.

“I’m sorry my love. It’s just I haven’t seen you in so long. I just got a little upset for a moment.”

“Xander?”

He lifts his head.

“Yes?”
I sigh.

“Oh so that is your name yes?”

He shakes his head warily.

“Yes that is my name…Monroe. What’s going on? Why are you pretending you don’t know me?? Is this a sign of trying to break up with me?”

I shake my head feverously.

“Oh no! Oh my…I have some explaining to do then.”

He lifts one eye brow still bewildered.

“Is there some place we can talk privately??”

He clears his throat.

“Oh yes of course. We can go back to my flat…If that’s alright with you?”

I nod.

“Alright. Well, we should be going.”

He stands up, then walks over to me and offers his hand.
I gently take his hand. He then pulls me in protectively; as if guarding me from the world. I put my head on his shoulder while we walked, and just then I knew that this was my Xander and I loved him and that he was going to help me. This I knew for sure.