I Left My Heart In Huntington Beach

Nicole’s Pov:

I smiled looking over at Bella who was staring intently at Brian’s tattoos. She began lightly tracing them with her fingers.

“Is this maekur?” Bella asked, tracing a different tattoo.

“What?” Brian’s pulled his eyebrows together as he stared at me. Right, cause I’m an expert on 3 year old talk.

I sighed. “Bella what did you say?”

“Maekur.” She yelled.

It took a few seconds before I finally put it together in my head.

“I think she’s asking if your tattoos are drawn on with marker.” I laughed as Bella smiled at me, nodding her head.

“I wright?”

“You’re exactly right Bella.” Brian chuckled and ruffled her hair a little. She turned red and cuddled into his side. I smiled at the two of them.

“Alright kiddies, I think it’s time for bed. It’s getting late.” I stood from the couch and walked over to the bag that Shauna had left me. I began pulling out Bella’s pajamas.

“Nicole, where is she gonna sleep?” Brian asked.

Crap. I hadn’t thought of that. I didn’t have a guest room, or a baby crib just lying around anywhere. I frowned and whirled around to face Brian. “I have no idea.”

I bit my lip and looked around my apartment. I began thinking of places Bella could sleep. As much as I loved the kid, she wasn’t sleeping in my bed with me. But I couldn’t just make her sleep on the floor. I thought of the only soft thing in my apartment besides my bed.

“What about the couch? It’s soft and long.”

Brian glared at me. “She is not sleeping on the couch Nicole.”

“Then where is she going to sleep Brian? The couch is the only thing I can think of.”

He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. I was thankful that Bella was still entranced by Brian’s tattoos, completely oblivious to everything around her. The last thing we needed was her to start crying again. He got up from the couch, picking up Bella as he did so.

“Come on let’s go to Babies R Us or something.” He reached around me to grab a jacket for Bella out of the bag.

“Brian it’s almost 9:30.”

He ignored me and set Bella on the ground. He carefully put her jacket on and picked her up again. She rested her head on his shoulder. “Where are your keys?”

I wanted to object, but Brian had that look on his face. That puppy dog pout. Damn that pout. I sighed and pointed to the kitchen. He smirked and walked over to kitchen, snatching the keys off the counter.

He handed Bella her bunny before opening the door to my apartment and walking out. I rolled my eyes and hurried after the two of them.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“Brian she’s 3 years old, she’s to big for a baby crib. We have to buy her a toddler bed.”

“Well where are those?”

“How the hell would I know? I’ve never been in this store.”

He rolled his eyes walking over to a worker nearby as I picked Bella’s bunny off the floor for the twentieth time. I wiped it off on my pants and handed it to her. She smiled and held it tightly to her chest. She was a lot of work, but she was cute. I guess I didn’t mind having Bella around after all. But the screaming thing, I could do without. That had to go.

“Babe.” I looked up at Brian who was pointing somewhere off in the distance. “They're in the back of the store.”

I nodded and adjusted Bella on my hip before I began walking after him.

We seemed to be the only ones in Babies R Us. It was us and the workers. And that one couple fighting over baby bib sayings. Odd. It also felt odd being in a Babies R Us with Brian. Never did I think I would be in this store with him when we first met.
I’d never even thought about having kids with Brian someday. Or getting married. It just never seemed to occur to me.

I wonder if he’s ever thought about any of that. I had to stifle a laugh as soon as I thought this. It’s Brian. Hell would freeze over before he thought about any of that.
His voice took me out of my thoughts and I realized we were at the back of the store.

“What do you think about the one with Barbie on it?”

“Brian you know your gonna have to set all of this up. I don’t even think it’ll fit in my car.”

“Bella do you like the Barbie one?”

I set her on the floor so she could go and lay in it. She shook her head, scrunching up her nose. She took a step back and began chewing on her bunny’s ear, carefully inspecting each bed. Most of the beds were either cartoon characters or just solid colors. I wondered what 3 year old kid would want just the solid colored ones. But I guessed those kids aren't allowed to make their own decisions.

Bella’s eyes lit up as she saw a bed at the end of the row. She threw her bunny on the ground and began running down towards it.

Brian ran after her as I picked the bunny up, again. I made a mental note to wash her bunny when we get home.

“This one! This one!” Bella’s voice echoed through the empty store.

Brian smiled and set his hand on the back of Bella’s head. “You got it baby girl.”

When I made it to the end of the row I saw the bed Bella had chosen. It was Batman. It looked like a mini version of the bat mobile. I had to admit, it was pretty awesome.

Brian called a worker over to help us check out. It was the same guy who had shown him where the beds were. I felt bad for him. I think he wanted to go home just as much as I did. The guy helped us find the correct box with the parts in it and carried it
to the register for us. There was only one cash register open. There was a woman sitting behind it reading a magazine and loudly chewing her bubble gum. The lady looked up as the box was placed in front of her. She hesitantly put down her magazine,
quieted her gum chewing and scanned the box.

“ That‘ll be $ 449.98.”

My eyes almost bulged out of my head at the price, but Brian pulled out his credit card like it was nothing. I didn’t even know what the guy did for a job, how could he afford this? The cashier lady began looking me up and down as Brian slid his card through the little machine.

I felt uncomfortable under her stare and began to fidget. I picked up Bella to see if holding her would help me stop fidgeting. It did a little. She was so fascinating to watch, everything just seemed to amaze her.

“She’s beautiful.”

I looked away from Bella to see the cashier lady now smiling and looking at Bella.

“Oh, thank you.” I politely smiled back.

“You must be so proud. I remember when my children were that age. Enjoy it.” The cashier lady looked like she was staring off into the distance, consumed by her memories. I was about to inform her that this wasn’t our child when Brian beat me to the punch.

“Oh we are so blessed for every day. I still can’t believe we’re parents.” He flashed me a quick smirk before turning to sweetly smile at the cashier lady. I quickly picked my jaw up off the floor so I could smile back as well.

“That is just so adorable.” She cooed.

Asshole. Brian was a total asshole.

Cashier lady handed Brian our receipt and we made our way back to my car. Surprisingly the box fit in my car. I wouldn't have minded if it didn't, I would have just made Brian carry it home. Just kidding....sorta.

It was a silent ride home. The only noise was the faint sound of the radio. I turned in my seat to check on Bella who was lying down on the seat sleeping. She was cuddling her bunny and lightly sucking on her thumb. She looked so precious, so angelic and
fragile. I smiled as the thought of me and Brian having kids someday popped back into my mind. Would I ever want to have kids with him? I was getting way ahead of myself. I shook my head and turned back around in my seat.

“Is she asleep?” Bri whispered.

“Yeah.”

He reached over and grabbed my hand, intertwining his fingers with mine. I rubbed his hand with my thumb.

I was staring out the window when the song currently playing on the radio caught my attention. I turned the music up just a little, hoping it wouldn’t wake Bella. I’d heard this song somewhere. Brian’s grip suddenly tightened on my hand.

“I’ve heard this song before, I think it’s called Bat Country. Heather listens to this band, I can’t remember their name though,” I bit my lip trying to remember the bands name. “Do you know what band this is?”

I turned to look at Brian. He seemed rigid, like he was frozen. I tried pulling my hand away as his grip tightened more.

“I have no idea who this is baby.” He finally confessed, smiling at me for a moment. His eyes looked tight, like I had hurt him by something I said. Was he a mind reader? Had he read my thoughts about getting married to him and having kids someday?

I continued staring at him for a few seconds as he turned his eyes back towards the road. Was he hiding something from me? I decided not to worry about it for now. Instead I continued trying to remember the bands name.

“I think the band’s name is avenged eightfold or something. Or was it ninefold? Something with a number.” I mumbled, more to myself. I don’t think Brian is even listening anymore.

“Mhm, I think it is eightfold.” Brian’s grip loosened. I guess he was listening. The song ended and the radio DJ’s voice replaced it.

“Alright, that was Avenged Sevenfold with Bat Country. The guy’s are supposedly back in Huntington Beach recording their new
album which should be out sometime in September or October. We’ll have guitarist Synyster Gates and lead singer M Shadows in here on Monday morning, so make sure you tune in.”

The grip tightened again. Did he not like this band or something and didn’t want to tell me?
His grip finally loosened after a few minutes and I pulled my hand away. Brian didn’t object. I turned down the radio and turned around to check if we had woken Bella. She had only switched thumbs. I sighed and slumped in my seat a little, wishing I would have just stayed at home and eaten ice cream.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I gently lay Bella on my bed and throw an afghan over her. Brian cusses in the living room. Hey, I warned him. I think I’ll end up being the one sleeping in the Batman bed. And Brian can sleep on the floor. I smiled a little to myself at that thought.
Or he can just hop back on that stupid bike of his and ride back to wherever he came from and go back to whatever life he lives.

I lay down on the bed beside Bella and think about just falling asleep right there. There’s a soft knock on the door frame. I sit up to see Brian standing in the doorway smiling. Little sweat drops are running down the sides of his face and neck. His smile drops a little when he notices that I’m not smiling back.

“What’s wrong?”

I glare at him before standing up from the bed and pushing him into the hallway, quietly shutting the door. I stomp out of the hallway and into the living room.

“Nicole, what the hell is going on?” He yelled after me.

“Stop yelling, your gonna wake Bella.” I snapped.

“Sorry,” he whispered. “What’s wrong?”

I didn’t answer until I was in the kitchen and sure that Bella wouldn’t hear us.

“What the hell was that in the car?”

Brian’s Pov:

Stupid Radio. Stupid, stupid, stupid radio! Out of all the damn songs in the world, they had to play that song? My bands song! And of course out of all the songs in the world, Nicole had to know that one? I bet Heather called in herself to request it.

I guess I took to long to answer because she began talking again.

“Do you not like that band or something? I mean it’s okay if you don’t, it’s not like I would hate you for that.” She began to raise her voice. “And how did you have all that money for the bed? I mean, you paid for it like it was nothing. I don’t even know what you do for a job Brian! You never told me. I don’t know where you came from, who you are. I mean you never tell
me anything! Is Brian even your real name? Is that even your real hair color?”

“What does my hair have to do with it?”

“Just answer the question!” she yelled.

“Yes, this is my real hair color. And Brian is my real name.”

“Then what do you do? Who are you Brian? I feel like I’m dating someone I don’t even know!”

“Nicole, stop yelling your going to wake Bella.” I tried to wrap my arms around her but she shoved me away.

“Don’t touch me Brian. Why did you freak out in the car and how did you pay so easily for the bed?”

I felt like I couldn’t breath. What the hell was I supposed to do? Tell her? Let her kick me out? I couldn’t tell her. If I told her I would lose her forever, but I don’t think I can keep up this lie anymore. I guess I’ll just have to add another lie to the mix.

I sigh and walk over to the dining table, taking a seat in one of the chairs. I can feel her eyes burning into my back. It’s eerie silent through the house. I look up at Nicole who is still staring at me. Well, glaring, actually.

“I’m sorry Nicole.” I sighed. “I really don’t like that band at all. I’m sorry I should’ve just told you but you sounded like you really liked them and I didn’t want to upset you. And as for a job, I got laid off. That’s why I came back home. Huntington is my home.”

I waited for her to speak.

She didn’t.

“I left home, because my dad died. Him and my mom live up in Oregon, and when he passed away I couldn’t stay there anymore. I wanted to be at home, with my friends. And I don’t think my mom wanted me around. I reminded her to much of dad.”

I have officially passed complete asshole. I might as well enjoy living while I can, because when, and if, Nicole ever finds out…I’m dead.

I heard her footsteps as she walked towards me. I continued staring at my feet. I couldn’t look her in the eye. I didn’t want her to find something there, and I didn’t have the balls to. She got down on her knees and I felt her wrap her arms around my waist and rest her chin on my shoulder. I carefully wrapped my arms around her shoulders and pulled her in
closer. I took a deep breath, inhaling her scent. She smelled like lavender.

“I’m sorry.” she whispered, pulling away and staring into my eyes.

I tore my eyes away from hers and darted them back to the floor. She began to lightly run her fingers through my hair.

“It’s okay. I’m sorry I haven’t been telling you much of anything lately.” I took another deep breath, forcing my eyes to look up at her. She shook her head.

“It’s okay.”

I pulled her back into a hug, kissing her forehead.

“Thank you for the bed by the way.”

“You’re welcome.”

She pulled back and got off her knees. “Let’s go get Bella in bed.” She reached her hand out to me, and I gladly accepted it.