The Kind of Hoax That Leaves a Lump in Your Throat

It was now Thursday and I was in my room quickly getting dressed. Tom had called a few moments earlier to say he was coming to check up on the store and if I wanted to tag along. I didn’t have any other plans so I agreed to meet him at Charring Cross so we could then get the tube to Oxford Circus.

Dan was downstairs with josh, but apart from that, everyone was out. I quietly went into the kitchen, did what I had to and then walked out. I could hear them talking animatedly from the other side of the wall. I knew they didn’t know I was there, so I listened for a bit. The topic soon changed though from the light hearted banter to something more serious.

“So mate, did you ask her?” dan said, and I could see the smile that was on his face, just from hearing his voice.

“Nah mate” josh sighed; it seemed almost hard for him to get out.

“And why the fuck not? It was the perfect time to do it”

“You think I don’t know that?” he growled frustratedly. “I just… I don’t know man. I chickened out. She just doesn’t understand how nervous she still makes me”

“Dude you’re like properly whipped” I heard dan chuckle but josh didn’t reply.

I left it a few seconds, before appearing in the door way, pretending like I hadn’t heard anything.

“Hey, tom just called and asked if I wanted to go to the store with him so I’ll call you when im on the way back” I smiled and josh just nodded, biting the inside of his cheek.

“Alright love, I’ll see you later” and with that he turned his attention back to the TV.

So that was a little cold.

I didn’t want to kick up a fuss so I just left without a word and made my way to where I was meeting tom. It didn’t take long for me to get there and I spotted tom right away, his head down, trying not to draw attention to himself.

He was dressed simply, a grey v neck with his tattoo’s peeking out of the top like usual, blue skinny’s and vans, but there was something about him that made it look more than it was. I couldn’t deny the pull I felt towards the boy, I’ll admit I was slightly attracted to him. I mean who wouldn’t be? But he was a friend and I felt nothing more than that for him. He was just a very good looking friend that’s all. I had josh and that was more than enough. If anything it was completely unfair.

His head came up as I got near and a small smile played on his lips.

“Tommy” I smiled and I wrapped my arms around him.

“Ah, still calling me Tommy eh?”

“You love it really” I teased as we pulled apart.

“Just don’t tell anyone” he winked and I couldn’t hold in the giggle.

“Right Mr. Sykes, where too?”

“Just follow me if you please Miss Simmons” he replied, and gestured to escalator to the tube. We were in and out of there in no time and soon walking to the store. It only took us about five minutes, and as we entered, all eyes were suddenly on us.

I felt extremely self conscious as people began to whisper and point in our direction and I looked to tom for some sort of support, but he looked just as uncomfortable as I felt.

“Go have a look round, I’ll be with you in a sec” he whispered before a girl came up to him asking for a picture, closely followed by a few others.

I wandered around looking at the clothes, and laughing to myself at how awkwardly shy tom was. Now he was in the shop all attention was on him so the rest of the shop was empty.

I saw a top I liked and went to see if it was in my size when I heard some girls talking. They were on the other side of the rack and couldn’t see me, but I could hear every word they were saying. Every word about me.

“I thought she was going out with josh, what’s she doing here with him?”

“What josh?”

“You know, josh franceschi, have you seen the pictures? It looks exactly like her”

“Pictures? No what pictures?”

“I thought I sent them to you? Anyway, you know josh was tweeting about being away in Australia last week? Well a fan saw him with this girl and there are loads of pictures of them together”

“They might just be friends”

“Hunnie, ive seen the pictures, and they were a little more than friendly”

“That’s not fair, he’s supposed to be mine” one of the girls moaned, and they both giggled afterwards. “So, like, how long do you think they’ve been together?”

“Well these are the first pictures ive seen of them like properly together, but in some pictures of him she’s in the background, and some tour diaries she’s backstage, and they were shot months ago, so who knows”

“But he didn’t break up with Hanna too long ago”

“I know its weird right”

The girls carried on, but I had to walk away. It was weird how they didn’t know josh, well not really anyway, but at the same time they seemed to know every last thing about him.

And now me? I mean I knew some day it might happen, I’d seen many of the fans opinions on Hanna, not all positive I must say, but they didn’t know her, so why did they feel the need to act like they did.

I was just wondering how much there was out there about me. I mean ive done some pretty embarrassing shit in my life, and I didn’t need any of that surfacing for them to hold against me.

People forget that famous people are human, and what you say will have an effect on them. They aren’t just a voice or a personality. They’re real, and they have really feelings.

Cause they way I see it is, you could be the sweetest, loveliest person in the world, and perfect for someone, but there will always be others out there trying to stop your happiness because you’ve “stolen” someone’s “boyfriend”. The fact that your boyfriend is famous seems to give others ammunition to hate you.

It’s almost like a reflex. Its almost natural, like breathing. Its instant, and once its starts, it will never really stop.

Cause lets be honest, we will never know these “famous” people that we’re “in love with”. Not really.

I walked back to the front of the store to find tom talking to a girl half his age, yet she was still trying to flirt. He must have seen me in his peripheral vision, because he quickly made his excuses, and came over to me.

“You ready for the tour?” he asked and I nodded. “You alright? Has something happened?”

“No, no, im fine” I said, plastering the best smile I could onto my face. I couldn’t tell he knew something was up, but he didn’t push it. Instead he just led me round, showing me every inch of the shop and introducing me to all the staff.

We were there for about an hour and a half in total, and I thought we were about to leave when he stopped me. “You seen anything you want?”

“A few things, but pay day isn’t till tomorrow” I joked and he just laughed before walking over to something I had been looking at earlier. It was a blue dress with doughnuts all over it, and it had grabbed my attention from the first second I looked at it.

“I saw you looking at this before, you like it?” I nodded and he looked me up and down before picking one up and taking it over to the till and placing it in a bag.

I was giving him a quizzical look and he just smiled before handing the bag over. “A present from me to you, you know, for coming here with me today”

“No tom, you don’t have to” I tired saying but he thrust the bag into my arms.

“Well I already have, so just take it” he smiled before leading me outside.

“Thank you, tom”

“Don’t mention it” he replied and we spent another hour wandering aimlessly around London.

“So are you going back home today?”

“Nah, im staying till Sunday, got some work to catch up on”

“Where you staying”

“Same hotel oli and I stayed in last time” he said and I nodded.

“Well the guys are doing some gigs in Paris next week so we’re having a few drinks in the pub tomorrow, you wanna come?”

“Sure, that sounds nice” he smiled, and before I knew it we were outside the station. “Well I guess I’ll see you soon then” he said and pulled me into a hug, resting his chin on my head.

“Will do, Tommy” I replied, and I felt his chest sake with laughter. We pulled apart, and I had to quickly dash for my train. I called josh on the way back and he told me that dan and him were at a music store and wouldn’t know how long they would be, but would call me when he’s near.

So when I got home I was met with an empty house.

I couldn’t get what those girls had said out of my mind for some reason, and I felt like I couldn’t rest until I had seen the pictures, so I quickly turned my laptop on and typed in josh’s name.

The usual suggestions came up, such as “josh franceschi you me at six” and “josh franceschi twitter”, but then there was “josh franceschi girlfriend 2012” I hesitantly clicked on it and then went to images.

Sure enough there were pictures of josh and I in Australia. Some on the beach, some with my parents, which totally creped me out, but then there were some of him and I just walking around London, or in the pub with some of the guys.

It felt weird, like I had this crazy stalker. But they didn’t want me, they wanted josh. I guess I was just part of the josh franceschi package deal now.

I was strangely okay with that though.