Closer to the Edge

Frank’s POV

I frowned and I nodded at his question, I was quite sad but the thought of me being selfish was coming into play today more than it had in a year. But I couldn’t help but feel jealous of Bob and Ray. They’d get to live the full life experience, they’d get married, and they’d fall in love… They’d make their own family and I would be dead. I’d be buried six feet under and they’d probably forget about me a year or less after my death.

I nodded my head sadly and I looked away from Gerard as a tear slipped down my cheek. I wiped it away before looking back at him. There was the blaring sound of a car horn and I jumped. My mom was sitting in her car tapping her finger rapidly. I looked back at Gerard and he sent me a smile.

“Hey, wait lemme give you my number.” He said quickly as I was getting to my feet. I nodded my head and I waited for him to get a pen or paper out. He just pulled his bag in front of him and he grabbed a marker, he grabbed my hand before writing down his number on my palm.

“Call me tonight. Maybe we could hang out tomorrow.” Gerard said, I nodded my head and took off to my mom’s car.

“Hey baby, who was that?” My mom asked me as I got in the car. I looked out of the window as I normally did each day.

“That was Gerard; he’s the new boy of the school.” I smiled.

“So did everyone tell him about you?” She asked as she drove down streets. I shook my head and I rested my head against the cool window. She looked over at me, “Well are you gonna tell him?” She asked, and I shook my head. “Why?”

“I just want a friend or two to not feel sympathy for me ‘cause I have a time line ma, if I can’t fall in love I might as well have a friend or two that don’t know I’m going to die in six months.” I said furrowing my eyebrows.

“But do you know how hurt they’re gonna be when one day you’re gone or you go to the hospital. What would you feel if one of your friends did that?” She asked.

“It’s not what they’d feel. It’s what I’m tired of feeling. Mom I may have Bob and Ray… But I know they show me sympathy. Ma I just want to have a couple of friends that’d I don’t know. Feel sympathy for me every day they have to look at me.” I snapped.

“Frank…” I cut her off.

“No mom I’ll tell them after the new years.” I mumbled. Feeling tears rise to my eyes for the fifth time today. “I just wanna be normal for a couple of months.” I choked out. The tears burned my throat and I could feel snot running out of my nose. My mom pulled up to our house and I jumped out of the car and I ran inside the house. Once I was upstairs in my room I collapsed in my bed and I let the tears spill out of my eyes.

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Later that night my medicine wore off and I jumped out of my bed. I yawned and I walked downstairs. I walked into the kitchen and opened the small cabinet that held my medicine. I grabbed my painkillers and I opened the white bottle before dumping out two tablets and I stuffed them in my mouth and swallowed them dry. I grabbed a glass of water and I walked into the living room where I had heard the TV running. My eyes widened when I saw two heads.

“Ma?” I asked. Both of the heads turned and there was my father who I had not seen since the day we had found out I had cancer. “Dad?” I asked not believing the sight in front of me.

“Hey Frankie...” He laughed nervously.

My eyebrows furrowed, “What are you doing here?” I asked.

“Well son… Your ma and I were talkin’ the other day, and we made up. We also decided that you’d want to have both of your parents…” He said. I rolled my eyes and I walked up to him before giving him a hug. I pulled away and I poured the water on his pants. He scowled at me.

“Shouldn’t have left the day I found out about having cancer you douche. I think that’s good enough payment. Now I’m going to my room to give my new friend a call…” I said walking out of the living room with my mom giggling at what I had done.

I’m such a good son.